lululee is offline lululee Post #1  October 31,2009, 10:08am
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off to a Halloween party

Joined: Oct 2009

London, England

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After a busy 2 months on eharmony, everything has gone quiet.

Though I send off questions to 90% of my matches, nobody responds. From what I can see, many don't even look at my profile.

Possible reasons:
- eharmony is new in the UK. After it's first burst of adverts, maybe the guys signed up for a month, while I did for the whole year.
- maybe they send you matches that aren't subscribed.
- maybe that's what happens when you hit 45
- maybe the new photo is not right

What do you think? Is there anything I can do?
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #2  November 1,2009, 10:35am
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I'm crippled by the fear That I've fallen too far to love

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lululee I am not sure how popular eHarmony is in the UK so it might not be very popular and active yet. I would suspect that may be a part of your problems.

Part of your problem is likely to be that most (about 90%) of your matches are non-paying members who can't communicate. This is certainly indicated by the fact that you say most don't view your profile.

As for the 45 thing, no don't think so.

As for the photo thing, if the photo here is the one on your eHarmony dating site profile, then nope nothing wrong with the photo. Maybe there is something wrong with the guys in the UK Maybe you just need to move across the pond
 
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eH_Advice_Host_Kate is offline eH_Advice_Host_Kate — Advice Official Moderator Post #3  November 1,2009, 1:33pm

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Hi Lululee,

It’s great that you signed up for a year. Our founder, Dr. Neil Clark Warren, originally designed eHarmony to be a year-long process, because the nature of looking for someone with whom to share a happy, long-term relationship isn’t a casual venture. If that is really what you are looking for, then you are in the right place. It is actually normal for there to be an ebb and flow of matches.

Since eHarmony UK’s inception, we have seen an exponent increase in membership, and expect that trend to continue. You can actually get assistance from our UK Customer Care team if you’d like their professional feedback on your settings and see if there are ways to open them up. They are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week through the UK Help link: http://help-singles.eharmony.co.uk.

Also, if you’d like feedback from the Advice Community, we have profile workshop threads running: Dating advice message board. You can always submit your About Me page answers for feedback from other community members. I haven’t seen your About Me page, but one thing to keep in mind is that sometimes very detailed, well-written profiles sometimes get fewer communications or responses – but they also help you to attract matches who would be more appropriate for you.

If the headshot you have posted here is the same as your primary photo for eHarmony UK singles, I think you don’t have anything to worry about. It’s generally helpful, however, to include a variety of photos – where you are demonstrating your hobbies, maybe some aspects of your daily life, and settings you enjoy. (Including full-body shots is a good idea too).

Good luck, Lululee!

~Kate
eHarmony Advice Host
 
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