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sexyme13 sexyme13 is offline
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
I am a white guy so I don't really have any answers but I do find the question interesting. It really raises another question in my mind that may be more pertinent.

1. Do blacks (or other races than white) use any dating sites in a significant percentage?

2. Do blacks (or other races than white) make up a significant percentage of eHarmony members?

I will take a complete SWAG at the answers to the first question is no which would make the answer to the second likely to be no also.
To answer your first question...yes a lot of Black women & men use dating sites, but some of the sites, in my opinion are more for casual dating and just for fun nothing serious, as far as going to long term towards marriage.
And to your second question, I am now compelled to believe that no, there aren't many Black women and me on eharmony, it is very very slim.
- October 16th, 2009, 09:33 am
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sexyme13 sexyme13 is offline
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[quote=Tank;770711]
sexyme13 wrote :
Well, it can be consider expensive to some at times, it all depends on how serious you are about meeting someone, but if the ad's of success stories appealed to all races across the board maybe more people would not mind paying for the service and join, because they will see it appeals to their interest. I also believe that maybe non paying matches should be sent to people that are paying members, it's a waste of time.

Do you mean non-payers should not be sent to payers? Just curious. I think it should be noted that over last 2 years I was a member of 4 other well known online dating sevices and they all follow the same trend. Vast majority of members are White as opposed to any other race. I think it is a cultural view against online dating and most believe that it is an act of "desperation", I know I used to.
Yes, my correction, I believe they should not be sent to paying members.
And it in some ways it can be a culture view about using online dating...but I am seeing that not being a problem as much anymore...because I am on other sites and it's lot of Black women and men, but the difference is, as what I stated above in another response, I don't think, on the other sites the people are as serious in finding a life partner as they are in just having a temporary find in casual dating or just a good time.
- October 16th, 2009, 09:38 am
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Sassafras54 Sassafras54 is offline
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I'm a white female and have specified "no preference" for ethnicity. Almost all my matches have been white men: say 50 white men, 5 Hispanics, 1 black man. I live in LA, which has no majority race, and my local area is very mixed.

Either there are very few non-whites on this site or most people only want to date within their race.

I think I have some qualities (other than race) that make my dating pool small. It still seems worth looking here ... makes for a bigger pool than I have without using eH, yes?

BTW there are several groups on this site for black women to talk to each other ... you might be interested in them. Do a search of "Groups" on "black women" etc.

Good luck to both of us!
- October 16th, 2009, 10:12 am
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sexyme13 sexyme13 is offline
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Sassafras54 wrote :
I'm a white female and have specified "no preference" for ethnicity. Almost all my matches have been white men: say 50 white men, 5 Hispanics, 1 black man. I live in LA, which has no majority race, and my local area is very mixed.

Either there are very few non-whites on this site or most people only want to date within their race.

I think I have some qualities (other than race) that make my dating pool small. It still seems worth looking here ... makes for a bigger pool than I have without using eH, yes?

BTW there are several groups on this site for black women to talk to each other ... you might be interested in them. Do a search of "Groups" on "black women" etc.

Good luck to both of us!
Thank you for the info...and yes Good Luck to you too!
- October 16th, 2009, 10:39 am
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ming_on_mongo ming_on_mongo is offline
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I think you raise a good point there, "sexy", and issues re: "affordability", "non-paying members", etc. aside, I could see how eH would give the impression of being a pretty "white" kinda place, at least culturally and politically.

Granted that successful black women already complain about not meeting enough "comparable" black men, but it probably doesn't help eH's image that it was founded by a white Evangelical minister. And though he's since tried to "broaden" its outreach, it's still widely regarded among (white) Evangelical circles as a "christian" site (which many in these forums will try to remind you). There's even been a fair amount of press concerning eH's hostility to "gays", or like someone has nicknamed eHarmony, as dates with "Churchy McHomophobes"!

And maybe not necessarily representative, this also seems to be reflected in the political forums here, where they're obviously very white male AND very conservative. Which is fine, but again, not noted for cultural or racial "diversity".

Finally, as mentioned earlier, if founder Dr. Neil Warren is truly looking to widen eHarmony's appeal, it would be great to feature some other examples of "successful" matches besides just whites. And even race aside, I for one am getting really sick of seeing that same couple ("Joshua" & "Tanyalee", who BTW oppose gay marriage), flogged over and over on the eH ads. And what are they saying, that this is the only succesful match that's happened here...?

Last edited by ming_on_mongo; October 16th, 2009 at 10:59 am. Reason: typo...
- October 16th, 2009, 10:52 am
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ming_on_mongo wrote :
I think you raise a good point there, "sexy", and issues re: "affordability", "non-paying members", etc. aside, I could see how eH would give the impression of being a pretty "white" kinda place, at least culturally and politically.

Granted that successful black women already complain about not meeting enough "comparable" black men, but it probably doesn't help eH's image that it was founded by a white Evangelical minister. And though he's since tried to "broaden" its outreach, it's still widely regarded among (white) Evangelical circles as a "christian" site (which many in these forums will try to remind you). There's even been a fair amount of press concerning eH's hostility to "gays", or like someone has nicknamed eHarmony, as dates with "Churchy McHomophobes"!

And maybe not necessarily representative, this also seems to be reflected in the political forums here, where they're obviously very white male AND very conservative. Which is fine, but again, not noted for cultural or racial "diversity".

Finally, as mentioned earlier, if founder Dr. Neil Warren is truly looking to widen eHarmony's appeal, it would be great to feature some other examples of "successful" matches besides just whites. And even race aside, I for one am getting really sick of seeing that same couple ("Joshua" & "Tanyalee", who BTW oppose gay marriage), flogged over and over on the eH ads. And what are they saying, that this is the only succesful match that's happened here...?

Man! I so feel you! I am tired of seeing them too! But yes I have heard about the controversy and I do believe they need to widen the aspects of the site to show that successful love matches can happen with other races too, not just for White men & women.... but thy just may not want to...the way they have it now and the way they advertise may be exactly what they want and the audience that they are appealing to....maybe everybody else is just a courtesy...I don't know..I'm lost and confused about this site. Lol!
- October 16th, 2009, 11:08 am
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varnold varnold is offline
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Well I want be a spectator and say that it doesn't work for black women but what I will say is that when its time and if this is the site for you that the right man would be at your finger tips.
- October 16th, 2009, 11:12 am
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ming_on_mongo ming_on_mongo is offline
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sexyme13 wrote :
Man! I so feel you! I am tired of seeing them too! But yes I have heard about the controversy and I do believe they need to widen the aspects of the site to show that successful love matches can happen with other races too, not just for White men & women.... but thy just may not want to...the way they have it now and the way they advertise may be exactly what they want and the audience that they are appealing to....maybe everybody else is just a courtesy...I don't know..I'm lost and confused about this site. Lol!
LMAO!!... yeah, they're a "pair" alright!
Apparently Joshua's MySpace profile lists "Jesus Christ my Lord and Savior and ultimate HERO, role model, and friend,", and Tanyalee (who I notice kinda mumbles alot, the little bit they let her talk), has gone on record in favor of California's Proposition 8 (banning gay marriage). But otherwise, I can't see any other reasons to think that eH might really be an all-white, right-wing conservative, fundamentalist christian propaganda vehicle, that's just masquerading as a "dating site" (wink-wink, nod-nod...)!
Last edited by ming_on_mongo; October 16th, 2009 at 11:42 am.
- October 16th, 2009, 11:36 am
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sexyme13 sexyme13 is offline
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varnold wrote :
Well I want be a spectator and say that it doesn't work for black women but what I will say is that when its time and if this is the site for you that the right man would be at your finger tips.
Thank you, that was very sweet...And I am trying to be optimistic....
- October 16th, 2009, 11:45 am
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[quote=sexyme13;770725]
Tank wrote :

Yes, my correction, I believe they should not be sent to paying members.
And it in some ways it can be a culture view about using online dating...but I am seeing that not being a problem as much anymore...because I am on other sites and it's lot of Black women and men, but the difference is, as what I stated above in another response, I don't think, on the other sites the people are as serious in finding a life partner as they are in just having a temporary find in casual dating or just a good time.
I would have to disagree with you there, I have had more than a few matches from Eharmony that started out as non-payers and then became paying and then contacted me and every potential match counts.
- October 16th, 2009, 12:22 pm
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