nobodyathome is offline nobodyathome Post #1  September 17,2009, 12:56pm
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I have recently joined your site as an available female. I am a little frustrated for 2 reasons:

1. There does not appear to be a choice to search or have matches sent to you based upon their past marital status + other good matching types. In my case, I am not interested in divorcees based upon my faith. I am only interested in widowers or never married. I have no way to tell if the matches you have sent to me fit in this category and it is very frustrating.

2. There does not appear to be a random way I can search and review profiles, only the ones you send to me. You have been sending many men matches to me that are significantly older than me even though my profile shows that that is not what I am interested in.

Please help me understand.

Thx.
 
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DDjr is offline DDjr Post #2  September 17,2009, 6:49pm
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nah...

Sorry... What you have found is "the way it works". (You might be able to choose previous marital status, though.)
 
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neardc is offline neardc Post #3  September 17,2009, 7:10pm
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You can't select on marital status, but you can set a more appropriate age range for you matches. Just go into the "My Settings" section and indicate what is your preferred age range for your matches.

The model that eH uses is different from other dating sites in that you are matched on the 29 dimensions eH has found are important for long-term relationship success. Thus, eH sends you matches that are compatible based on those factors instead of allowing members to search through a large database of matches. It's up to you, then, to indicate in your profile your preferences on a number of variables (so eH can also send you matches that best fit those preferences), and to review profiles once you receive them to see which ones most interest you.

If you are only willing to consider never-married and divorced men, you might want to indicate that in your profile (I don't know your age, but if you are older this will of course significantly limit your pool of matches...).
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #4  September 17,2009, 7:49pm
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Based on your religious restrictions I would have to believe that, unless your particular religion has a singles / dating site, online dating sites are not going to work very well for you. Though Match may work for you as you can limit your search to never married and widowers and you can limit your religious preferences to only your religion.
 
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trailviews is offline trailviews Post #5  September 18,2009, 2:40pm
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I'd say that eHarmony is not a good site for you to use. Not only does eHarmony not let you match on marital status, it doesn't even display people's marital status in their profiles.

Your only option on eHarmony would probably be to ask about marital status during guided communication.
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #6  September 18,2009, 3:14pm
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nobodyathome wrote :
I have recently joined your site as an available female. I am a little frustrated for 2 reasons:

1. There does not appear to be a choice to search or have matches sent to you based upon their past marital status + other good matching types. In my case, I am not interested in divorcees based upon my faith. I am only interested in widowers or never married. I have no way to tell if the matches you have sent to me fit in this category and it is very frustrating.

2. There does not appear to be a random way I can search and review profiles, only the ones you send to me. You have been sending many men matches to me that are significantly older than me even though my profile shows that that is not what I am interested in.

Please help me understand.

Thx.
hmmm, I forgot if it was even in the questions they ask you to submit your profile??

You did put it in YOUR profile, right?
For example: I'm looking for a guy who's never been married or who is a widower, please, no divorced men"....
In any event, your best bet is probably to use fast track, if you are going to be staying with EH.
 
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BuzWeaver is offline BuzWeaver Post #7  September 18,2009, 4:43pm
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This seems better addressed by giving the OP an introduction to EH.
 
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melcalrrt is offline melcalrrt Post #8  September 21,2009, 10:23pm
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Don't know if I can say this here, but there is a Christian Singles website by that name I belive, with dot com

I tried them, didn't like my matches but it might work for you. I think the others are right you likely won't find that here. I've had dozens and dozens of matches and not one is widowed or never married, at my age there are very very few men who have never been married and virtually none who are kid-free which would be ideal for me. I had the last man on earth who had never been married and had no kids but couldn't hang on to him.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #9  September 22,2009, 5:18am
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melcalrrt wrote :
at my age there are very very few men who have never been married and virtually none who are kid-free which would be ideal for me. I had the last man on earth who had never been married and had no kids
I checked your profile; you're about my age. I can't agree with your estimates of "Very very few" and "virtually none" - there are quite a few of us. And it's not like we hide in the shrubbery and meet in secret when the moon is full. We're out there.

That is all.
 
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