radicalgnostic is offline radicalgnostic Post #1  September 11,2009, 9:57pm
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hopes for better weather.

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I'm 50 y.o., never married, no kids, no relationships that have lasted longer than a few weeks.

Nearly all the matches I've received have been women about my age, or a little older, divorced or widowed, with kids & grsndkids. Yes, I've missed out for much of life being alone.

I thought I could find someone I could relate to, and I'm starting to despair. Yes, I know it's only been 3 weeks since I joined and nothing good happens rapidly.

Not enough the profile doctors or image physicians can make me look appealing, I fear. Anyhow, let me stop here, before I go on a self-pitying rant here.

Any suggestions? How does one become "Instant Parent"?
Relate to others?

O well, have a good day anyway.

rg
 
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Laughingdaily is offline Laughingdaily Post #2  September 11,2009, 10:17pm
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Ride along, and Remember to laugh every single day!!

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Maybe try writing down some of the things you need and/or want in a potential partner. That may be a good place to start.

Socialize some and meet people. You may be past the point here where you would be a parent of minors still at home. You can look at your preferences and see what you have set there.
 
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howlong is offline howlong Post #3  September 11,2009, 10:18pm
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Well I am still quite young. But I think that this could be a positive thing, that is if you paint yourself as someone that wants to get involved with their grandkids etc.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #4  September 12,2009, 8:59am
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Do you have no siblings with children that you have been around quite a bit during your 50 years? Have you no friends with children?

You will find women in your age range with children that are both early teens (or younger) who are living at home and those with adult children who live on their possibly with children of their own. Choose those who are most compatible with your own values and lifestyle. You should not need to worry about be an instant parent. Everything takes time and that includes meeting and getting to know any children involved. It will all work itself out.
 
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charlie990 is offline charlie990 Post #5  September 12,2009, 10:20am
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radicalgnostic wrote :
I'm 50 y.o., never married, no kids, no relationships that have lasted longer than a few weeks.

Nearly all the matches I've received have been women about my age, or a little older, divorced or widowed, with kids & grsndkids. Yes, I've missed out for much of life being alone.

I thought I could find someone I could relate to, and I'm starting to despair. Yes, I know it's only been 3 weeks since I joined and nothing good happens rapidly.

Not enough the profile doctors or image physicians can make me look appealing, I fear. Anyhow, let me stop here, before I go on a self-pitying rant here.

Any suggestions? How does one become "Instant Parent"?
Relate to others?

O well, have a good day anyway.

rg
The first question is :- are you REALLY sure you want to be a parent ??... do you want to father a child, or just be a parent to an existing child ?
Often we assume the grass is greener.. that happiness and fulfillment can be found if in a relationship with someone else..
the founding "DR" at Eharmony reccommends that you stay on board for at least a YEAR..
Anything in life is possible IF you put your everything into it ...if you have little experience with relationships, do NOT expect it to be easy .. for love an open heart and mind is essential ..
one thing I can tell you is that Eharmony alone will NOT do the trick..join other sites ..its dead easy to get dates on craigslist ( mostly hookers though) have some fun relating with women....get in some practice .. be prepared to make changes in your outlook toward achieving your goal... and most of all..remember ..it takes TIME and effort..
 
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theweave is offline theweave Post #6  September 12,2009, 10:49pm
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[quote=charlie990;737704..its dead easy to get dates on craigslist ( mostly hookers though) have some fun relating with women....get in some practice .. be prepared to make changes in your outlook toward achieving your goal... and most of all..remember ..it takes TIME and effort..[/quote]

That might be fun! Expensive but fun!!! Never tried there, Kijiji yes, Craigslist, NO!
 
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sabete2002 is offline sabete2002 Post #7  September 15,2009, 2:29pm
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What are you looking for - a relationship with a woman who may have kids or to be a parent? Huge difference.

To be honest, if I read a profile that indicated a guy wanted to be a father to my children, I'd probably close him out. Firstly, it would suggest that he is not so interested in me as the fact that I have children. Secondly, my children have two parents who are very much involved in their lives. Another adult could enrich their lives but would never be a parent in the same way.

Take things a step at a time. First you need to find someone with whom you want to build a relationship then, if they have children, you meet them and begin to establish a relationship with them.

And don't give up just yet. Three weeks isn't long in the great scheme of things.
 
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