k374 is offline k374 Post #1  September 10,2009, 7:43pm
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What are your thoughts on re-opening matches you closed months ago with the reason "I don't think the chemistry is there"? Does it sound cheesy or desperate to do so? What about someone you stopped contacting a while ago... would you contact them again if you suddenly feel maybe your decision to stop talking to them was premature? Or is this never an acceptable thing to do?

What is the dating protocol!?
 
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jayjay is offline jayjay Post #2  September 10,2009, 7:45pm
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Well, I'll tell you. If you closed someone giving the reason 'I don't feel the chemistry is there' and they asked you to re-open.....they have some serious balls. I just re-opened a match earlier this evening, but that was previously closed for noncommunication. For you I'd just say to think about why you closed the person in the first place (for lack of chemistry)? Was it a mistake?
 
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melman is offline melman Post #3  September 10,2009, 7:47pm
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Anyone you closed "months ago" might not have been active back then, and almost certainly isn't really there now. Forget about it.
 
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bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #4  September 10,2009, 7:53pm
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Do whatever you want to do. Nothing to risk there.

I would say don't close unless you are sure. It is better to just leave it open indefinitely than to close prematurely.
 
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bwr is offline bwr Post #5  September 10,2009, 8:41pm
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I am the type of person that always moves foward and never goes back. I just can't build up enough motivation or interest to try to re-open a closed match.
 
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Oregon_Coast_Guy is offline Oregon_Coast_Guy Post #6  September 11,2009, 12:21am
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You closed the match for a reason. Just remember the reason why you closed them in the first place and you'll keep them closed.

I would not re-open matches that ask me to re-open. It means that I was either Plan B, or, it could be that they just want to be the one to do the close. (There are plenty of female posters who are mad that the guy closed them out first).
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #7  September 11,2009, 8:55am
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I am smart enough to know that it is impossible to judge "chemistry" without ever meeting in person. Therefore I usually close matches because they never communicate or they have something in their profile which I consider a deal breaker.

Once you have said there is "No Chemistry" then that is the end of it.
 
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bwr is offline bwr Post #8  September 11,2009, 2:22pm
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I actually only one time on eH opened a match back up after she requested a re-open 3 months later. I had no prospects at the time and had nothing better to do.

I had closed her before because she was too slow to communicate and went poof.

Well, guess what? It was the exact same story again - she was too slow to communicate and she went poof again, and I closed her again.

Once plan B, always plan B.

The way I see it is if two people are truely interested in eachother, they will know it and things will move along smoothly without major frustration and doubt. Every successful (and I mean every) match for me happened this way.

I think it's best just to move on to the next matches.
 
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