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Gr8Guyn2008's Avatar

Gr8Guyn2008 Love is so confusing. There's no peace of mind

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chawks64 wrote :
I...
I...
I just can't say it.
Why not? I eat green beans, carrots and corn. On occasion I can be persuaded to eat peas. But I don't do all those weird vegetables. Do like salad though
- August 31st, 2009, 08:59 pm
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chawks64 is getting very sleepy.

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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
I dislike vegetables
chawks64 wrote :
I...
I...
I just can't say it.
Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
Why not? I eat green beans, carrots and corn. On occasion I can be persuaded to eat peas. But I don't do all those weird vegetables. Do like salad though
Oh! That's something completely different.

Never mind!
- August 31st, 2009, 09:01 pm
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olneyjeeps Like a match made in heaven, but it was made on EH.

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chawks64 wrote :
I...
I...
I just can't say it.
someone's mind is in the gutter (where all the fun is)?

chawks64 wrote :
Oh! That's something completely different.

Never mind!
You are such a tease!
- September 1st, 2009, 08:32 am
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Iconography doesn't know exactly what she's looking at, but is liking what she sees

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I just thought I should post an addendum to this conversation: I'm in OC with a match. His profile contains a word that, had there been a filter for it, I would have chosen to exclude. Which would mean, of course, I wouldn't be in the very pleasant situation I am right now.

So don't be too hasty. You might be more broad-minded than you know.
- September 13th, 2009, 03:18 pm
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Well, just to add my 2 cents...

Yes, the OP is correct, Washington/Seattle is obviously one of the most liberal places in America, except perhaps maybe San Francisco.

So presumably, she has a beef (ha!) in that she really should be getting a lot more liberal vegan Matches than she is getting.

However, maybe I am reading too much into it, but it sure sounds like the OP isn't willing to compromise on anything...
Not exactly what guys are looking for for that perfect EHarmony Match.

For example, whats wrong with him going off on nature hikes or a Harley bike ride during the weekend while you go to the art festival in the city?

There was a skit once on SNL.... Called "Me-Harmony".
Where the site matches you up with yourself, except for the being the opposite sex.

As for filters, which is actually the topic at hand...
I don't believe EHarmony wants that kind of thing set up.
They allow you filters on what a LOT of people consider super-deal-breakers. Religion and Distance are the biggest.
Things like being a vegan or not just doesn't really fit into what they believe makes or breaks a real relationship.
If you want lots of filters, you probably should hit a different site, like Match. I believe they allow a whole slew of different filters.
- September 13th, 2009, 10:25 pm
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Well here's my two cents:

I believe E-Harmony had a good theory in the beginning when they thought they could match people up based on scientifically matching them using a computer program. But here's the catch... We are human and we are driven by instincts and a far more complex system if internal factors beneath the conscious surface than E-Harmony could even get near.

There are billions upon billions of neurons firing in the brain all at once when the mind makes both an unconscious and conscious decision to proceed. Things including an unconscious comparison to ones own father or mother, millions of previous experiences, voice inflections, facial expressions, body language, etc. along with those suprising interests that are revealed as two people start dating that might actually be a fun and interesting new fact about the person (IE: you find out he enjoys working on a Harley). This is the good stuff, it's what makes dating fun and worthwhile..so if your frustrated by E-Harmony, it might be because attempting to go against nature and against millions of years of courting progress.

Try the real thing...if you need a little help in getting around people and don't want to go to a bar to meet people, there is a site I have discovered called (Meetup .com)...it is a site that you just join a local group of friendly people that go out as a group (like movies, dinner, the park, etc). Its far more natural, just let it happen. Join your local moviegoers group on meetup.com (or just check out the different ones they offer). It was the Holy Grail for this guy.
- October 7th, 2009, 11:58 am
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Well here's my two cents:

I believe E-Harmony had a good theory in the beginning when they thought they could match people up based on scientifically matching them using a computer program. But here's the catch... We are human and we are driven by instincts and a far more complex system if internal factors beneath the conscious surface than E-Harmony could even get near.

There are billions upon billions of neurons firing in the brain all at once when the mind makes both an unconscious and conscious decision to proceed. Things including an unconscious comparison to ones own father or mother, millions of previous experiences, voice inflections, facial expressions, body language, etc. along with those suprising interests that are revealed as two people start dating that might actually be a fun and interesting new fact about the person (IE: you find out he enjoys working on a Harley). This is the good stuff, it's what makes dating fun and worthwhile..so if your frustrated by E-Harmony, it might be because attempting to go against nature and against millions of years of courting progress.

Try the real thing...if you need a little help in getting around people and don't want to go to a bar to meet people, there is a site I have discovered called (Meetup .com)...it is a site that you just join a local group of friendly people that go out as a group (like movies, dinner, the park, etc). Its far more natural, just let it happen. Join your local moviegoers group on meetup.com (or just check out the different ones they offer). It was the Holy Grail for this guy.

Funny.. For someone to claim e-dating is going against the nature of millions of years of the courting process. Then themselves are using a website to find friends, sounds very similiar...Sorry I don't see the difference!

EH or any other dating site doesn't replace the courting process or any of the other insticts you mentioned. imo it's a way for two peoples paths to cross, that in IRL might not ever cross. and if a computer sends me a possible match so what! All those insticts and courting still have to happen. I don't have a million years to wait for that to happen at the grocery store.

Last edited by CaptCrunch23; October 7th, 2009 at 12:50 pm.
- October 7th, 2009, 12:39 pm
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Iconography wrote :
I just thought I should post an addendum to this conversation: I'm in OC with a match. His profile contains a word that, had there been a filter for it, I would have chosen to exclude. Which would mean, of course, I wouldn't be in the very pleasant situation I am right now.

So don't be too hasty. You might be more broad-minded than you know.
Hi Everyone,

Thanks, Iconography, for your post. Your experience is exactly the reason why we don't do the type of filtering that the OP was requesting.

As many have already shared, we match members using those personality qualities and traits proven to be the foundation of long-lasting, successful relationships. Additionally, members are able to set preferences that are important to most members, i.e., distance, age, and religion, etc.

Should a match meet both our rigorous matching process and your matching preferences, we feel the best way to support your success is to give you the opportunity to evaluate their About Me page in total for yourself.

Like Iconography said, if matches were filtered out based on words in their About Me page, she would not have had the opportunity to read her match's About Me page, which inspired her to communicate with him, and eventually reach Open Communication! And my guess is that quite a few of our successful couples would also have never met if we did that type of filtering.

We know that sometimes members don't believe us when we share that there is a reason you received each and every match, but it is true! Even so, we don't expect you to like all of your matches right off the bat, and that is why we encourage you to be open-minded and do some communicating with most if not all of your matches before deciding they aren't The One.

However, if you know that someone absolutely has no potential to be that special match strictly from their About Me page, close the match. That is, simply, part of the process as you search for The One on eHarmony.

All the best,

-Renee
eHarmony Advice Host
- October 7th, 2009, 03:23 pm
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I think, living in the Pacific Northewest you will be hard-pressed on finding someone who doesn't hunt, fish, or camp or any one or combination of those three.
In may dating history it seems that many men hunt. I't a guy thing, I don't get it.
- October 7th, 2009, 10:28 pm
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