sheerpictures is offline sheerpictures Post #1  August 18,2009, 6:51pm
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When you're skimming a person's written info, what do you see that makes you want to close a match instantly?

As someone who has closed many matches and who has been closed by many matches, I am curious to see why others choose to cross people off their list of potentials.

After all, although there are a few basic "Do's" and "Don't's" involved in filling out your Introductory Information, profile evaluation is very subjective. I don't think there is a universal Ideal Profile. Different people are attracted and repelled by different qualities.

There are two things that make me close a match almost instantly.

1. Poor or sloppy writing. As an English teacher and a lover of literature, I can't help but recoil when there are glaring spelling mistakes or clunky sentences.

2. Even more stomach-churning than grammar mess-ups is banality. When people answer questions with meaningless declarations like "I am passionate about living life to the fullest!" or hybrids of various cliches such as "Life is full of its ups and downs so I always pick myself up and start again and have great hopes for the future" or bemusing run-on sentences in the manner of, "I am hoping to better myself every day and gain new experiences and knowledge that will help me better able to support my family, friends, and future partner and become more successful at my job," I start popping Pepto-Bismol.

Men who sound like fortune cookies or inspirational Christian bookmarks = not sexy.

Men who sound creative & quirky = sexy.

What about you? Why close a match? What does he or she write, or how does he or she write, that turns you off?
 
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texastee is offline texastee Post #2  August 18,2009, 7:12pm
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"I want a woman who can go from ball gown to ball cap."

What does that mean?
 
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GypsyWillow is offline GypsyWillow Post #3  August 18,2009, 7:20pm
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Upon first look at a profile, if it is not completely filled out that is a no. If they have answered questions with "You will have to find out", or "Only my friends know", I find it unacceptable. I also don't care for a profile with out a photo.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #4  August 18,2009, 7:35pm
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Most of the profiles I see look like they've come off a big Xerox machine somewhere. And I'm talking about profiles that have been filled out... not ones that are obviously incomplete.

(one thing you're passionate about) "I am passionate about living life." Come on, you can't point to one thing that makes you who you are? This ought to be the easiest question in the whole profile, perhaps that's why it's listed first. But hardly anyone can write an interesting answer.

(The first thing you'll notice about me) "I'm very shy." Way to put a positive spin on yourself.

(something only your friends know) "If you become my friend, then you'll know" or some variation. So not only can't you think of anything distinctive, but this is your best attempt at humor?

(anything else you want to say) "Not at this time." Hey, thanks for that.

(last book read) "The Secret." Wish for something and it will come true. You have no sense of knowing how to reach your goals, and apparently no religious thoughts either. You're just clueless. That's nice.
Last edited by melman; August 18,2009 at 7:56pm.
 
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GypsyWillow is offline GypsyWillow Post #5  August 18,2009, 8:01pm
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texastee wrote :
"I want a woman who can go from ball gown to ball cap."

What does that mean?
What does that mean? OK you like baseball games so she should like sporting events, but the ball gown. In todays world what kind of event are you going to take your date to where she would be able to wear a ball gown. Just curious.
 
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nfalls is offline nfalls Post #6  August 18,2009, 8:19pm
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GypsyWillow wrote :
Upon first look at a profile, if it is not completely filled out that is a no. If they have answered questions with "You will have to find out", or "Only my friends know", I find it unacceptable. I also don't care for a profile with out a photo.
"I'm new so I hope this works. PLEASE POST A PHOTO. People think that's shallow but it's not. I have a BA in Psych and chemistry involves looks and that's that. Fill out ALL the questions. And don't use the same cliches."
 
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LeonardoMystic is offline LeonardoMystic Post #7  August 18,2009, 9:02pm
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I close out matches often for the reasons as follow:


1. You have time to sign up, you have time to fill out your profile. Nothing will make me close a match faster than an incomplete profile. If you had time to create one and take the Compatibility Test, then you can make time again to fill out that profile. This includes a clear photograph. I prefer matches who have a photo so I can see who I'm talking to.


2. Be intelligent. Is it so hard to be clean and clear cut in your sentences? Define paragraphs; don't crowd everything together, and be careful about spelling and grammar. When in doubt, consult a dictionary.


3. Be descriptive. You're telling us about yourself so those who are interested can formulate a good opinion of you so you don't end in the pile of millions of closed matches. I hate the one liners and the "ask me if u want to know".


4. While I am a Christian and it's great to have my match Christian, that's not all who I am. It shouldn't be what you're all about either. I want to know hobbies, favorite foods, TV shows, etc. More often than not I get Matches where in each and every question all they do is talk about God or anything religious.


Number 4 is the one that's been peeving me most lately. I am getting downright sick of it. I can't formulate a good opinion on a Match if all they answer is with religion. Why won't you say anything else about your life in your profile? I know your religion can't be all who you are.
Last edited by LeonardoMystic; August 18,2009 at 9:05pm.
 
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DeltaKing is offline DeltaKing Post #8  August 18,2009, 10:07pm
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"I am passionate about life." I didn't realize so many other people share my sentiment about this one - it's an empty answer.

First name = one initial. I'd rather see a made-up name than a timid name.

No photo. C'mon, at least post one.
 
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Teacherman25 is offline Teacherman25 Post #9  August 18,2009, 11:21pm
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My favorite.....
(Most important things in your life) my beautiful baby boy (hes my world), My child support, and SEX.

I am not kidding guys. That was what one of my matches ACTUALLY put.

I have to agree with OP. The biggest turnoff for me is poor grammar. I don't think you have to sound like you are lecturing 300 students at Harvard, but at least make sure you sound like you finished the 4th grade. Some of these profiles are so bad it makes you wonder how ignorant the person must sound in real life. Either that, or they didn't spend much time on their profile.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #10  August 19,2009, 4:58am
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has all the tools and can........satisfy

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No photo and basically blank profile is a huge turn-off.
Last edited by tweet37; August 19,2009 at 4:58am. Reason: Kinda like the OP.
 
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