MicMan is offline MicMan Post #11  August 19,2009, 4:54am
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is living life to 83% of its normal capacity.

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Like several others have said....incomplete profile and no picture.

If you put up pictures with other people, make sure to clearly label which one you are. "out with friends" is wholly unhelpful if all of your pictures are group shots.

Don't have a one-dimensional profile. If you keep hammering the same thing over and over and over and over and over again, you're going to come off as having that thing as the only thing in your life.

Please, no txt spk in ur profile.

Make your profile as who you are, not who you want to be. For example, if you went scuba diving once on a vacation ten years ago and you've never done that since, it probably isn't a good idea to say that's something you're passionate about or can't live without or whatever.
 
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Down_To_Earth_Runner is offline Down_To_Earth_Runner Post #12  August 19,2009, 5:43am
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A few Turn-offs regarding photos:


No photo. Obviously.

Tiny photos. Barely make out the color of their hair.

Photos of the person in a group of 2, 3, 5, etc. people of the same sex, and they never indicate which person is them. So you still have no idea what they look like.

Photos of the match with her/his ex. I have seen quite of few of these where the picture has the girl with a guy and the caption reads “me & my ex”. Yeah, that’s what I want to see!!

Senseless photos without the person in the picture; e.g. places they have visited, their pets, car, etc. Wow, you visited Germany, I have to start communicating with you!!

Their profile lists “Never” for drinking or smoking, yet they have photos of themselves drinking or smoking. Classic.

Photos of the match with a friend, and the friend is much more attractive.

Feel free to add your own!
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #13  August 19,2009, 5:58am
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I will rarely immediately close a match. If there is no photo I request a photo.

When I do close immediately it is usually because from their photo I can tell that I just do not find them at all attractive and I am not looking for a model. Or they have referenced something in their profile that I am just not compatible with. If they mention that they spend their leisure time riding their Harley that would be an instant close, just not interested in becoming emotionally involve in an organ donor.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #14  August 19,2009, 6:01am
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I'm crippled by the fear That I've fallen too far to love

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When you're skimming a person's written info, what do you see that makes you want to close a match instantly?

As someone who has closed many matches and who has been closed by many matches, I am curious to see why others choose to cross people off their list of potentials.

After all, although there are a few basic "Do's" and "Don't's" involved in filling out your Introductory Information, profile evaluation is very subjective. I don't think there is a universal Ideal Profile. Different people are attracted and repelled by different qualities.

There are two things that make me close a match almost instantly.

1. Poor or sloppy writing. As an English teacher and a lover of literature, I can't help but recoil when there are glaring spelling mistakes or clunky sentences.

2. Even more stomach-churning than grammar mess-ups is banality. When people answer questions with meaningless declarations like "I am passionate about living life to the fullest!" or hybrids of various cliches such as "Life is full of its ups and downs so I always pick myself up and start again and have great hopes for the future" or bemusing run-on sentences in the manner of, "I am hoping to better myself every day and gain new experiences and knowledge that will help me better able to support my family, friends, and future partner and become more successful at my job," I start popping Pepto-Bismol.

Men who sound like fortune cookies or inspirational Christian bookmarks = not sexy.

Men who sound creative & quirky = sexy.

What about you? Why close a match? What does he or she write, or how does he or she write, that turns you off?
Not everyone writes like Hemingway
 
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JDavid is offline JDavid Post #15  August 19,2009, 7:52am
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In profiles on any of the "matching" or "dating" sites the following are items that cause me to hit "delete".

Bitterness, baggage, negative attitudes ("I don’t want any more drunks or losers, already had that").

Inability to communicate effectively – brief or blank profile, grossly incorrect spelling or grammar, simplistic statements, or preponderance of clichés.

Identification that primary focus of life is upon God, grandchildren or pets / animals. Those may be admirable to others, but they do not fit with me.

Indication that "fun" and entertainment are primary considerations in relationships (mentioned ahead of more significant personal characteristics or relationship attributes).

Stated desire for travel, fine dining, expensive pursuits (on someone else's dime – unless specified otherwise)


Lack of photo or photo that is not clear is not an immediate "deal killer", but it makes me wonder why. Appearance is a factor for all of us – there is no point in being coy or sanctimonious. If a person continues to hide their appearance - - - delete.
 
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NKD599 is offline NKD599 Post #16  August 22,2009, 2:58pm
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People that come off as judgmental are another big turnoff. For instance, "If they mention that they spend their leisure time riding their Harley that would be an instant close, just not interested in becoming emotionally involve in an organ donor."
 
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Teacherman25 is offline Teacherman25 Post #17  August 23,2009, 6:43pm
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NKD599 wrote :
People that come off as judgmental are another big turnoff. For instance, "If they mention that they spend their leisure time riding their Harley that would be an instant close, just not interested in becoming emotionally involve in an organ donor."

I disagree with that statement. I do not think the above post is judgmental at all. Nobody is saying you are or it is bad to ride a Harley. They are only saying that it isn't for them.

If someone says, smoking is a deal breaker because they don't want to spend the last 5 years of the relationship caring for a lung cancer patient, I can't get mad. They simply don't want to date a smoker. Its not for them. it would be very different if someone said....I don't like smokers...They are a bad group of people.
 
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bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #18  August 23,2009, 6:56pm
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If a man were to close every profile that contained "living life to its fullest" then he would have noone left to communicate with & would not be dating online. You really have to ignore that as hard as it may be.
 
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bigfincat is offline bigfincat Post #19  August 23,2009, 7:05pm
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texastee wrote :
"I want a woman who can go from ball gown to ball cap."

What does that mean?
Are you really asking what that means?

I will agree that it is a lame way to put it though.
 
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missalmost is offline missalmost Post #20  August 23,2009, 7:36pm
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Guys who don't bother to answer the questions. I've had quite a few of my matches do this-one guy even wrote "I'll fill this in later" on almost ALL of the questions. The only thing I learned about him was his age, location, height, and his name. Plus, for his job, he had listed that he "sold white goods". Huh? Linens? Or cocaine?
I also get some very odd answers, that make me wonder if the guy is stable. One wrote for a reply to the question "What is the first thing people notice about you?" He said.....my smell. Wow. Had to restrain myself from fast tracking that one
 
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