waiting for the match to initiate


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pussinboots is offline pussinboots Post #1  August 16,2009, 7:18am
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Have you ever been interested in a new match, but from reading the profile felt that [s]he might not be interested in you, so you waited for the match to initiate GC?

Or do you just think, what do I have to lose?

For example my new match today writes that she is looking for, among other things, a Renaissance man. I don't think I'm that, but doesn't eH send you matches prescreened on the 29 Dimensions?

Of course, with the way it's been going lately for me here, I'm amazed that she has a photo and would be even more amazed if she is a paid subscriber. lol
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #2  August 16,2009, 7:29am
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Yes I will sometimes wait for a match to initiate. My usual reason is that she is much taller than me so I consider that she may have a problem with that.

I can't recall that I have had any girls that I thought were good matches except for one thing that I felt would be a problem for them and wait and let them initiate where they did eventually initiate.

I can certainly relate to the non-paying member situation. I currently have over 50 matches in the Communicating folder and at present none are actually communicating.
 
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chawks64 is offline chawks64 Post #3  August 16,2009, 8:22am
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A lot of women won't initiate contact no matter how attracted they are, so I'm not sure it's a good idea to wait. Unless, of course, being semi-traditional in that way is unattractive to you.

I know I initiated with a guy about a year ago, and we ended up going out for for 4 months. Now I know he was a jerk , but when we started dating, he told me he had a lot of matches, but hardly anyone ever contacted him. They were all waiting for him to do it.
 
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pussinboots is offline pussinboots Post #4  August 16,2009, 8:35am
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chawks64 wrote :
A lot of women won't initiate contact no matter how attracted they are, so I'm not sure it's a good idea to wait. Unless, of course, being semi-traditional in that way is unattractive to you.

I know I initiated with a guy about a year ago, and we ended up going out for for 4 months. Now I know he was a jerk , but when we started dating, he told me he had a lot of matches, but hardly anyone ever contacted him. They were all waiting for him to do it.
I was about to take your advice and initiate, but I just noticed this match prefers FastTrack. Maybe I should wait a little until she at least looks at me?! [Believe me, I'm not being shy here.]
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #5  August 16,2009, 8:55am
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chawks64 wrote :
A lot of women won't initiate contact no matter how attracted they are, so I'm not sure it's a good idea to wait. Unless, of course, being semi-traditional in that way is unattractive to you.

I know I initiated with a guy about a year ago, and we ended up going out for for 4 months. Now I know he was a jerk , but when we started dating, he told me he had a lot of matches, but hardly anyone ever contacted him. They were all waiting for him to do it.
I look positively at a match that has the confidence to take a risk and initiate communication. The girl I am looking for is going to my equal in every way. That includes indicating interest in me by inititating, be it communication at eHarmony or during the dating process by asking me out.

I do check my matches at least once a day and if I receive a match during the day I will check then also. With the exception of the few that totally turn me off , who I close, or those that I don't think I quite meet what they are looking for I send First Questions immediately.
 
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notyet is offline notyet Post #6  August 16,2009, 9:17am
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chawks64 wrote :
A lot of women won't initiate contact no matter how attracted they are...
a lot of men won't initiate contact no matter how attracted they are.

here it is, folks! if you are interested in someone, let 'em know! none of us can read minds, here. and someone has to take that first step.

if nobody initiates contact- the relationship will certainly not progress!
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #7  August 16,2009, 9:36am
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pussinboots wrote :
I was about to take your advice and initiate, but I just noticed this match prefers FastTrack. Maybe I should wait a little until she at least looks at me?! [Believe me, I'm not being shy here.]
Dude,
While you're waiting, some other guy is not. If you're not comfortable with fast track, then start with GC.
 
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marmer is offline marmer Post #8  August 16,2009, 9:52am
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I have received 70 matches only one initiated communication. Plenty view me and then either don't initiate or don't close. I try to remind myself that MOST of them were "flex" matches or non-members. Still, I sometimes wonder what I'm paying for as well as "why" no one seems to be interested in me at all.
 
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MicMan is offline MicMan Post #9  August 16,2009, 4:34pm
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pussinboots wrote :
Have you ever been interested in a new match, but from reading the profile felt that [s]he might not be interested in you, so you waited for the match to initiate GC?

Or do you just think, what do I have to lose?

For example my new match today writes that she is looking for, among other things, a Renaissance man. I don't think I'm that, but doesn't eH send you matches prescreened on the 29 Dimensions?

Of course, with the way it's been going lately for me here, I'm amazed that she has a photo and would be even more amazed if she is a paid subscriber. lol
I've never waited to initiate with a match. If I'm going to pay for a subscription, I'm going to take full advantage of it.

I feel I have more to gain than I do to lose.
 
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pussinboots is offline pussinboots Post #10  August 16,2009, 5:44pm
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OK, OK, I just started GC. Let's see if she is active and will even respond.
 
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