Women what does Closed via "Other" typically mean?


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duggus is offline duggus Post #1  July 5,2009, 11:45am
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Is closed by "Other" code for you so ugly? Or "you too old"?? Seems to me that to be respectful, at least we should give a valid reason to close a match. Such as distance too far or age between us too great. I am very new to this and perhaps being overly sensitive.

What the heck??
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #2  July 5,2009, 11:47am
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I used “other” for appearance, but also lifestyle differences that I could discern from her profile.
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duggus is offline duggus Post #3  July 5,2009, 11:58am
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Thanks for the reply. Too sensitive I am. Seeya
 
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neardc is offline neardc Post #4  July 5,2009, 12:08pm
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There are a number of threads on this topic in this forum, so you might want to scroll through and look at those.

Basically, though, it means nothing. There are so many different things it could mean, from "it's the closest option to the bottom of the page" to "your profile is incomplete" to "I don't like guys with freckles."

The bottom line, though, is that it doesn't matter. Closed is closed. Just focus on the remaining matches.
 
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eH_Advice_Host_Kate is offline eH_Advice_Host_Kate — Advice Official Moderator Post #5  July 5,2009, 12:12pm

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Hi Duggus,

eHarmony includes “Other” in the list because not all the selections may describe the real reason that a member would like to close. We encourage members to try not to place too much weight on any reason a match may choose to close, because they don’t know the real you, and don’t have enough information about you to evaluate what kind of relationship partner you would be with the person who is right for you.

From what I have gathered in talking to multiple members (both women and men), there are just about as many reasons for using “Other” as there are members. It seems to vary on a case by case basis. I hope you get a good sampling here.

You could always send a final message indicating that you would like her to reconsider. If she does re-open the match and communication continues, later on you may have your chance to find out why she originally closed the match. You never know!

All the best,

~Kate
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel Post #6  July 5,2009, 1:05pm
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I usually choose other because my reason is not in the list provided. I agree with D_Lion--it's not meant to be a negative statement on my part, but more of a "something isn't clicking for me."
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #7  July 5,2009, 4:22pm
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I'd like to see a write-in reason. They're probably afraid some people would be rude.

I try to avoid it because I know it can be misconstrued, but I've used Other for all the reasons mentioned above. Especially when nothing else seems to fit.

One of these days you'll be using Other too! Good luck.
 
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Chrissyb622 is offline Chrissyb622 Post #8  July 5,2009, 4:38pm
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I don't like the "Other" either, but if you look at it one way...Who Cares? It was quite obvious you are better off anyways and that person didn't have the courtesy to be nice. It probably doesn't help that there's too many options when you close a profile.
 
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