Why all the unclosed matches? Guys, any ideas?


View Poll Results: Why do men leave matches open?
Too lazy to close the match 6 33.33%
Too busy to close the match 3 16.67%
Why bother? 3 16.67%
Thinking about responding, but waiting 3 16.67%
Hoping the woman will take the initiative 7 38.89%
None of the above 3 16.67%
Other-write in possible ans? 6 33.33%
Multiple Choice Poll. Voters: 18. You may not vote on this poll

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MayB2Old is offline MayB2Old Post #1  July 3,2009, 5:09pm
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Gentlemen,

I am a 52 y/o woman from Silicon Valley, CA. Yep, I'm a few pounds overweight (20 to be exact), but have a reasonably attractive face (even after that hack job by Freddie from Friday the 13th, or is that Jason?). Ok, humor aside, I'm curious about something..

I have had quite a few "matches" left in my list of open matches. Obviously, if a guy's interested, he emails, if he's definitely not, he closes the match (preferably, gracefully, instead of "I wouldn't touch you if you were a two bagger!" lol).

But what of these ones who may or may not have looked at my profile and just leave them open. Too lazy, too busy, afraid of being flamed (not able on eH, thankfully)? Oh, especially those ones that peak everyonce in a while. Should I email them? I used to take the initative, but it never seemed to work out (that old hunter/gatherer role thing I guess)..

Any insight?!? It would be sooooo appreciated.

Signed
A Frump that is Stumped..
 
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chrlesmd is offline chrlesmd Post #2  July 3,2009, 6:00pm
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Some of them may not be paying members so they may not be able to communicate unless it's free weekend or something. I don't know why eharmony matches people with non-paying members, but it is what it is.

From my perspective, if I'm interested in someone, I do intiate communication. So, the fact that these matches haven't initated communication probably means they're not paying members or they're not interested. Hope that helps.
 
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DownHomeDiva is offline DownHomeDiva Post #3  July 3,2009, 6:13pm
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Thanks for asking that question. I was wondering, too....
 
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graceventually is offline graceventually Post #4  July 3,2009, 6:24pm
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I suspect that charles is right, and most of these are nonpaying. When I was on eH, I found there were few male subscribers in the 50's age bracket. (I met my fiance on a different site.)

There is a free weekend, though, so who knows? Best of luck!
 
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MayB2Old is offline MayB2Old Post #5  July 3,2009, 8:15pm
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Thank you, Gentlemen. I actually found another topic that was describing the non-paying "matches". Sure, I'm no Christie Brinkley, but 167 "matches" and no interest?! Yikes! Somebody toss me the name of a good plastic surgeon! lol

God help us all!

 
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hawqeye is offline hawqeye Post #6  July 3,2009, 8:38pm
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I as one guy, when I review matches and I like them I initiate conversation. Any matches left over some will get left open for a couple days for me to evaluate some more.

However I do close out my matches which I feel there is no chemistry there from reading the profile.

When matches do not respond to my communication after a week or 10 days then I close them out, even if eH suggests to nudge and wait 2 more weeks. I feel if someone is interested enough they would have done something in a weeks time.
 
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BobinFla is offline BobinFla Post #7  July 3,2009, 9:51pm
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Women do this too.
 
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Rob_UK is offline Rob_UK Post #8  July 4,2009, 4:35am
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I don't leave matches open - I send a cam if i am attracted and if now answer in three days then bang - I close it
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #9  July 4,2009, 9:36am
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When I was subscribed to eH I was literally inundated with matches. I learned real quick to close out the ones who I thought had no potential right away. I has so many requests to communicate that I was too busy to start anything with the ones that were left open. What's the harm in leaving them open?
 
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Zev is offline Zev Post #10  July 5,2009, 12:34pm
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I'd like to know why a guy requests fast track and then doesn't reply when you respond. The reply I sent was friendly but not too personal and contained one or two open-ended questions that would be easy enough to reply to. He's not closed the match either.

I can see how some guys leave so-so matches sitting around unopened because they might want the woman to contact them, first, but why not respond when contacted? Just close the darn thing if you're not interested!
 
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