JTF is offline JTF Post #1  June 21,2009, 5:50pm
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A week ago a girl requested communication with me on eHarmony. When I sent my first questions in, she answered in a couple of hours. I then sent my Must Have/Can't Stands and she didn't reciprocate for about 5 days, and then she closed me today. This makes me think that there might have been something in my MH/CS that made her lose her interest. But none of them seem to me to be particulary drastic or offensive. Here they are...

MH / CS

Intellect / Anger
Sense of Humor / Lying
Tolerant / Boorishness
Adaptability / Workaholic
Emotionally Generous / Rude
Curiousity / Petty
Affectionate / Cheating
Kindness / Pessimism
Strong Character / Mean Spirited
Chemistry / Victim Mentality

Anything stand out to ya'll?
Last edited by JTF; June 21,2009 at 5:53pm.
 
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wishamee is offline wishamee Post #2  June 21,2009, 6:01pm
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Yep, your MH/CS are fine. She probably saw that she cannot measure up on some need. Maybe she has anger issues, has cheated, doesn't mind lying when it seems handy and do so again.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #3  June 21,2009, 6:39pm
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I have encountered the same thing in the past. I changed my MHCS to be the most mundane that I could find. I also have a bit in my profile that my MHCS are more would like and would rather not have.

With respect to your MHCS I don't see any that someone should find out of line.

This match probably was in communication with other matches that they found more interesting.
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #4  June 21,2009, 6:48pm
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I agree with Great Guy.

I think you have no cause for concern with this list.
 
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rightthingtodo is offline rightthingtodo Post #5  June 21,2009, 7:04pm
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Aaahhh! The "dreaded" MH/CS! It took me a long time to get mine down to 10 each, but once I got 'em, I stuck with them! After all, you want to present yourself accurately if you hope to find a true match. Don't take rejection too personally, my friend. There are plenty of fish in the eHarmony sea...you just have to stay with it! I was on for 4 months before I found anyone with whom I really wanted to get to the point of Open Communication with, much less meet in person. It was worth the wait!
I was matched with the Man of My Dreams almost two years ago and I can't say enough good things about how well eHarmony's matching system worked for us!
Just hang in there, continue to be honest with yourself (and honest in your profile and answers) and the right one will come along!
 
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gneissgirl is offline gneissgirl Post #6  June 21,2009, 7:04pm
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They look fine. One should not change their answers just to please others.
 
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JTF is offline JTF Post #7  June 21,2009, 7:12pm
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What would men be without women? Scarce, sir, mighty scarce...

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gneissgirl wrote :
They look fine. One should not change their answers just to please others.
Thanks for the input. I wouldn't change my answers to please others. I was just curious to see if any of them jumped out to ya'll.
 
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Jomiah is offline Jomiah Post #8  June 21,2009, 7:15pm

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People play games. Not everyone has the same motive. Don't lower your standards, definitely DO NOT change your must have/can't stand list and don't give her another thought, your perfect match will come. Enjoy this process and don't sweat it.

Best of luck.
Last edited by Jomiah; June 21,2009 at 7:17pm.
 
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bluskies4ever is offline bluskies4ever Post #9  June 21,2009, 11:26pm
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It looks like your photo has a woman lopped off. Even if she's just a friend or sister or whatever, I think it's best not to present photos like that to matches.

Your MHCS list is wonderful and you should be commended for your fine values.
 
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Mayne is offline Mayne Post #10  June 22,2009, 12:05am
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
I have encountered the same thing in the past. I changed my MHCS to be the most mundane that I could find. I also have a bit in my profile that my MHCS are more would like and would rather not have.

With respect to your MHCS I don't see any that someone should find out of line.

This match probably was in communication with other matches that they found more interesting.

Why would you (or anyone) try to "game" your MHCS? The idea is to set forth your must haves and deal breakers. If you just want a "date" and don't want to offend anyone, there are far better services available than this.
 
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