Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Using eHarmony If you have questions or comments about eHarmony's matching process, post it here. Or, lend your guidance and support to a fellow eHarmony member.

Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
PrettyPeepers PrettyPeepers is offline
PrettyPeepers's Avatar

PrettyPeepers is so happy the weather's finally warmed up here!

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 6

See profile

Hi everyone. I'm new to eHarmony Canada. I started on Thursday. I've received 16 matches so far and I've noticed that most of them haven't bothered to look at my profile. Is that typical? Is it normal not to log in every day? Do people get bored with this process and just quit but not close their profiles?

I'm frustrated with this because I am being sent about 5 - 6 matches a day and only 5 have viewed my profile. I'm considering cancelling my membership tomorrow. This is an expensive membership and if this lack of viewing/responses is typical I am not satified with that. I was hoping at least one person would respond by now. I've started communications with 4 matches and none of them have responded yet they've viewed my profile. Is that typical too?

Sorry if I sound like I'm whining. I just want to get a feel from people what their experiences have been in this regard. If there is another thread covering this, sorry. Please point me in the right direction.

Thanks.
Last edited by PrettyPeepers; June 14th, 2009 at 09:29 pm.
- June 14th, 2009, 09:25 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#1   Reply With Quote
pussinboots pussinboots is offline
pussinboots's Avatar

pussinboots is sitting next to the bearded randy geezer to discuss head transplants

Pacesetter

Join Date: Mar 2009

Posts: 389

See profile

Hi, I created a thread also on "using eHarmony" on May 29th. It was titled "profile not being viewed". You may want to refer to it and the posts - including mine - that followed.

As I wrote somewhere else, in my experience about 90 to 95% of your matches will not be active paying subscribers.

If I can give you a little advice: Don't think about canceling yet; you will not get a refund. - Leave yourself open to the possibility of meeting someone from the U.S. as I have done with someone from Canada. We have not met yet, BUT we at least have skype with webcam, which you should think about getting for any possible LDRs. [Canada itself is a big country.] - You have to be patient; I was on eH almost half a year before I started communicating with my LDR.

Seeing your picture and reading your advice profile, you will get a lot more interested and interesting matches than I did at the beginning.
Last edited by pussinboots; June 14th, 2009 at 10:23 pm.
- June 14th, 2009, 10:11 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#2   Reply With Quote
bravethestorm bravethestorm is offline
bravethestorm's Avatar

bravethestorm Still looking for the wedding dress!

Volunteer Community Leader

Join Date: Jul 2008

Posts: 1,235

See profile

Welcome to eharmony and eha!

I think it would mainly be people new to the site that would login daily. The system will send you an email if a match requests communication. I'll generally login in a few times a week or daily if in communication with a match.

It's typical that sometimes you'll get a lot of responses and other times a dry spell. Also some people view your profile anonymously but don't close the match. Generally I'll wait about 2 weeks to a month and then close out the ones that don't respond.

Give the system a chance and take breaks as needed. It's one of those things that is best used as one opportunity to meet someone and not the only method.

Good luck in your search!
- June 15th, 2009, 01:33 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#3   Reply With Quote
Gr8Guyn2008 Gr8Guyn2008 is offline
Gr8Guyn2008's Avatar

Gr8Guyn2008 I'm in love and always will be ... All that was there will be there still

Sage

Join Date: Jan 2008

Posts: 10,615

See profile

PrettyPeepers wrote :
Hi everyone. I'm new to eHarmony Canada. I started on Thursday. I've received 16 matches so far and I've noticed that most of them haven't bothered to look at my profile. Is that typical? Is it normal not to log in every day? Do people get bored with this process and just quit but not close their profiles?

I'm frustrated with this because I am being sent about 5 - 6 matches a day and only 5 have viewed my profile. I'm considering cancelling my membership tomorrow. This is an expensive membership and if this lack of viewing/responses is typical I am not satified with that. I was hoping at least one person would respond by now. I've started communications with 4 matches and none of them have responded yet they've viewed my profile. Is that typical too?

Sorry if I sound like I'm whining. I just want to get a feel from people what their experiences have been in this regard. If there is another thread covering this, sorry. Please point me in the right direction.

Thanks.
As has already been mentioned a high percentage of your matches will be non-paying members who can't communicate. I also believe that most non-paying members are not active. I, too, have found that 90% plus fall into this category. It has been my experience that this is the case on all the other dating sites that I have been on (Match, Yahoo! Personals and POF).

Some questions for you to consider to answer some of your other points.

1. If you are getting 5 - 6 matches a day and you have only contacted 4 then you should have a lot of matches that you could contact. It is a numbers game, the more people you contact the more likely someone will respond.

2. If you were to be trying to meet single guys in person how many would you have to approach before you actually found one that would be interested in actually seeing you again? To carry this question further, how many guys do you see in your everyday life before you actually meet one. At least with eHarmony and other reputable dating sites you have some confidence that the guys you are getting matched to are single and looking to date and form a relationship.

3. You say that eHarmony is expensive. How much would you be spending if you were out on the town seeking to meet guys? Probably a lot more than you spend on eHarmony.
- June 15th, 2009, 08:49 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#4   Reply With Quote
DDjr DDjr is offline
DDjr's Avatar

Enthusiast

Join Date: Dec 2008

Posts: 848

See profile

Welcome to EH & EHA!

There is an expectation with the EH that you will marry your first match. Unfortunately, EH doesn't have a warehouse of "Stepford Wives" waiting to wind up and send out.

EH is just a process of sifting for gold. You have to look at a lot of sand!

How to succeed with EH:

1. Plan that it's going to take months or years, not weeks or days.
2. Don't worry about any particular match (whether they are looking at you, whether they are answering your questions) until into Open Communications.
3. Have good pictures (head shot and full length) visible to everyone.
4. If you like the looks of a match, send questions.
5. Examine all your settings. Try to up these to just outside your comfort zone.
- June 15th, 2009, 09:07 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#5   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

lookin4lovexo lookin4lovexo is offline
lookin4lovexo's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 41

See profile

What does not make sense to me is why they don't even bother to look at the profile. I am aware that they are not paying and unable to communicate... but why can't they at least look at the profile?
Then you say they are "inactive"...well if they are inactive why did I just get matched with them recently(past couple of days) and not the first day I signed up if I have not changed my settings? If they are truly inactive I would assume E Harmony would match me up with them the day I signed up. New members are getting matched with me daily not old ones...right?
- July 13th, 2009, 12:49 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#6   Reply With Quote
ActionSoftGuy ActionSoftGuy is offline
ActionSoftGuy's Avatar

Quick Study

Join Date: Mar 2009

Posts: 151

See profile

lookin4lovexo wrote :
Then you say they are "inactive"...well if they are inactive why did I just get matched with them recently(past couple of days) and not the first day I signed up if I have not changed my settings? If they are truly inactive I would assume E Harmony would match me up with them the day I signed up. New members are getting matched with me daily not old ones...right?
Bad assumptions. No cookie!
- July 13th, 2009, 01:34 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#7   Reply With Quote
lookin4lovexo lookin4lovexo is offline
lookin4lovexo's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2009

Posts: 41

See profile

So the day we sign up we do not get matched up with all of our matches? Every day they send us a couple more, some of which are old members(that were saved and not matched with us right away)? If this is the case, that is really bad on Eharmony's part.
- July 13th, 2009, 01:43 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#8   Reply With Quote
FengShuiBlackBelt FengShuiBlackBelt is offline
FengShuiBlackBelt's Avatar

FengShuiBlackBelt can't win for losing.

Quick Study

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 158

See profile

Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
It has been my experience that this is the case on all the other dating sites that I have been on (Match, Yahoo! Personals and POF).
The difference on those sites is that you can see who is online and get a sense of who the active users are by watching the traffic. eHarmony gives you no indication of how many of your matches actually use the site and are able to communicate.

Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
3. You say that eHarmony is expensive. How much would you be spending if you were out on the town seeking to meet guys? Probably a lot more than you spend on eHarmony.
Again, you would be meeting real people and not looking at dead profiles. It may be more expensive, but you can communicate with them and filter them in real time. Not to mention, you'd be doing something fun instead of sitting in front of a computer. So there's a tangible return on investment whether you find a match or not.

I think it's a bit disingenuous of eHarmony to match paying members with dead profiles. We pay with the expectation that others will be paying too.
- July 13th, 2009, 02:22 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#9   Reply With Quote
rusli rusli is offline
rusli's Avatar

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 2

See profile

I'm very disappointed in the number of matches that I'm getting. I haven't received a match in ages and the people that I did start communication with did not respond. I was one of the non paying members for a long time and a few months ago I thought that maybe if I was a paying member I would have a bit more luck. At least if anyone did contact me, I'd be able to respond. Since I've started paying 3 months ago, I have had a lot less activity in my account. I've even tried changing my profile, changing my settings, etc., etc., and still nothing. I've already paid for the full year so I'll stick it out til then but I will not be renewing.
- July 13th, 2009, 06:44 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#10   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply
Page 1 of 2 1 2

Bookmarks


« Anyone else having problems uploading a photo? | Array | eHarmony 'ants' to hear from you »
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
What NOT to say in my "About Me" Profile SarcasticInSeattle Using eHarmony 23 February 6th, 2010 04:31 am
Matches dried up dreamingartist Using eHarmony 19 November 19th, 2009 10:02 am
how to block a match from viewing my profile? megan_texas Using eHarmony 7 November 6th, 2009 07:46 pm
I must be doing something right, because... Mr. Nice Guy Using eHarmony 4 June 5th, 2009 03:20 pm
viewing my profile LindaLoo716 Using eHarmony 2 May 23rd, 2009 06:12 am

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“My guess is that he's just joshing with you. He's probably thinking back to a time when it may have been a big issue that his own young daughter or sister was not allowed to call boys, so to him ... ” – oldsewandsew

Join the “He asks me if I'm allowed to call boys??? What??” discussion

“Bless your heart. I hope you get a second chance or learned from this and have a great second first date. BTW, I actually liked the kissing the hand part. ” – newbie40something

Join the “Rough Start” discussion

“You know, sometimes being gracious and mature is really difficult. There are so many things I want to say, particularly now that the rumours are flying, but what's the point? He never heard me in the ... ” – lindseyk

Join the “It's over.” discussion

“Five stars for getting Male thinking! And chance of getting me a Beer now? I don't know ~ is your mom busy or not right now? I won't be getting it, obviously, I think like a man. ” – trixie1868

Join the “When a guy says he's not looking for a relationship...” discussion

“The living together is not good and you have to think about the child as well in this.. it best that until he can make up has mind as if he want to really step up to the plate... i personal would ... ” – misswright

Join the “co-habiting with no engagement... smart or not?” discussion

“ Have you ever fallen in love very early on? Do you believe it is possible? No....nyet....nah...nunca! This phenomenon has somehow never been a personal experience...ever!” – legend29

Join the “Is love at first sight real?” discussion

“I have learned that IRL dating fits my personality and demeanor much better then online dating.... Yes...I have to be seen and heard IRL to be fully appreciated!” – legend29

Join the “What lessons have you learned from online dating?” discussion

“Thank you for your take. I appreciate that you took the time to help! Is she worth it? OH YEAH!!! Do I think it will all work out? 10% chance. The lady is 1 in a million as far as I am concerned. We ... ” – confusedinfl

Join the “Help” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 06:47 pm.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2010, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0