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stevenvictx stevenvictx is offline
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Maybe this is just my own problem , but do any other regular income people notice that most your matches are people who are high paying professionals who might rather view you as someone they would hand a slice of bread and bowl of soup to, than date ?

Normally this wouldn't be a problem for me, men in general, or maybe even a plus, if it wasn't for the fact that unless you look like a underwear model, most woman WILL NOT date below their income level.
The experts call it 'support mentality' or something.

Is there a average pay option button anywhere?
- June 13th, 2009, 11:09 am
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tbesq tbesq is offline
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No, eHarmony is not a site for rich people. It is one of the more expensive dating sites at the outset, but you can often get promotional codes for subscription rates that beat some of the other popular paying sites.

As for the income levels of those who subscribe, I have found a decent income dispersion. About a third make less than me, a third the same, and a third make more.

I am not going to speculate as to the income desires of female eHarmony subscribers, that's just asking for trouble. I will say that on other dating sites where income is listed along with income preferences, I have found that about half the women prefer men to make the same or more, and the other half don't mind if the man makes at least 75 cents to their dollar. But I would guess that women may be concerned that they would have to support a man, hence the desire for similar or greater income. But of course, some women may take issue with men who desire women with similar or more income, because that robs some of the "traditional" role should they want that.
- June 13th, 2009, 11:20 am
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trailviews trailviews is offline
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IMHO, coming across as a slightly more expensive dating site is just one part of eHarmony's marketing to attract female members, among others. It's like buying an iPod.

If you wanted me to honestly guess, I'd suspect the members on eHarmony have a slightly higher average income than members on most of the other popular paid dating sites, and the members on those sites probably have a slightly higher average income than members on most of the other popular free dating sites. But, I'm not convinced the difference is large enough to matter to most people.
- June 13th, 2009, 11:40 am
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neardc neardc is offline
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I think that trailviews is correct in that incomes are probably slightly higher (since you have to have some disposable income to subscribe), but there are people from a a very wide range of incomes represented on eH. With discount codes, I never pay more than $10/month for my subscription (purchased in 3-month blocks for $30); at roughly the cost of a movie ticket (no popcorn, though!), that's accessible for most people if it's something they would really like to do.

Given that we each indicate our income in our profile, as well as how important income is to us as a match variable, you can probably assume that most of the women you are matched with would be comfortable with a man at your income level. Some may not be, of course, but it is indeed your problem if you assume that they are all only looking for a Mr. Moneybags.
- June 13th, 2009, 11:50 am
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Mayne Mayne is offline
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Not for the "rich", per se.. but certainly more geared toward upper middle class professionals. That's one reason why it is more appealing to me... I want a respectable and intelligent professional woman, not the tatooted chick with a nose ring so commonly found on other dating sites.
- June 13th, 2009, 11:56 am
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Mayne wrote :
Not for the "rich", per se.. but certainly more geared toward upper middle class professionals. That's one reason why it is more appealing to me... I want a respectable and intelligent professional woman, not the tatooted chick with a nose ring so commonly found on other dating sites.
I like how you equate tattoos with low status or people who aren't professional. How quaint. I think if you saw me in the office then saw me at the beach, you'd be quite shocked.
- June 13th, 2009, 12:03 pm
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tweet37 tweet37 is offline
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stevenvictx wrote :
Maybe this is just my own problem , but do any other regular income people notice that most your matches are people who are high paying professionals who might rather view you as someone they would hand a slice of bread and bowl of soup to, than date ?

Normally this wouldn't be a problem for me, men in general, or maybe even a plus, if it wasn't for the fact that unless you look like a underwear model, most woman WILL NOT date below their income level.
The experts call it 'support mentality' or something.

Is there a average pay option button anywhere?
The reality is you're going to get different answers here than what is practiced 'out there'.

On the eH questionaire there is a setting for education preference ranging from not important to very important. (I don't think there is one for income). Usually, the higher the education level, the more income. I'm not saying always. If your match and / or you select not important, that may explain why you're getting matched with such matches. The reality is once the match realizes that someone is below their actual standard, they're gone. Since eH doesn't match for income level, oftentimes it's not until after the first date that they come to this realization.

The 'regulars' on these forums will say that income and education aren't as important as a lot of other things, but that's not the reality of what's 'out there'.
- June 13th, 2009, 12:16 pm
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neardc neardc is offline
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tweet37 wrote :
On the eH questionaire there is a setting for education preference ranging from not important to very important. (I don't think there is one for income). Usually, the higher the education level, the more income. I'm not saying always. If your match and / or you select not important, that may explain why you're getting matched with such matches. The reality is once the match realizes that someone is below their actual standard, they're gone. Since eH doesn't match for income level, oftentimes it's not until after the first date that they come to this realization.
Income isn't one of the "29 factors," but it is one of the "preference" variables (like smoking, drinking, distance, etc.) that is used to identify the best matches. In that section, you indicate both your own income category and how important income is to you as a matching variable. The income categories that they use seem overly broad, but checking your own income category and indicating that income is "very important" should match you most often with women at a similar level (I think that's how it works, anyway...lol).
- June 13th, 2009, 12:34 pm
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Work_in_Progress Work_in_Progress is offline
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stevenvictx wrote :
Maybe this is just my own problem , but do any other regular income people notice that most your matches are people who are high paying professionals who might rather view you as someone they would hand a slice of bread and bowl of soup to, than date ?

Normally this wouldn't be a problem for me, men in general, or maybe even a plus, if it wasn't for the fact that unless you look like a underwear model, most woman WILL NOT date below their income level.
The experts call it 'support mentality' or something.

Is there a average pay option button anywhere?


The site does appear to be geared more toward upper-middle and higher classes, and in my case, it's probably safe to say most men are not below my income level; however, I wouldn't say all or most of my matches are necessarily highly paid professionals.

I also don't assume that those in the higher earning brackets would necessarily be more likely to hand me a slice of bread and a bowl of soup as date me, though I'm sure some would, but to be honest, I prefer not to date them, either, and sincerely hope I never find myself too attracted to one of them.

I can see how this might be more of a problem for a man, but still think honestly that huge gaps in any of the major areas of compatibility really do hinder the chances of a successful match, so better with a couple of good matches here and there than many with poor potential.
- June 13th, 2009, 12:42 pm
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Icarus_rw Icarus_rw is offline
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I never really saw the price of eHarmony as that much of an issue. I just figured it would weed out all the people that weren't really interested and/or serious about a meaningful long lasting relationship.

~I
- June 13th, 2009, 12:51 pm
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