How do you tell the difference between someone running a scam and a genuine match?


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Mr. Nice Guy is offline Mr. Nice Guy Post #1  May 25,2009, 2:40pm
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I have a suspicion that one of my matches may actually be someone running a scam, but I know little about the obvious signs, so I am not exactly sure whether I am right or not. Something just doesn't seem right about this match, but I am unable to pinpoint exactly what the problem is. Please tell me how you can tell the difference between a scam match and a real genuine match. What are the obvious signs? What might be the not-so-obvious signs to watch out for?
 
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eH_Advice_Host_Renee is offline eH_Advice_Host_Renee Post #2  May 26,2009, 1:35pm

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Hi Mr. Nice Guy,

Glad to hear that you are not discounting your concerns regarding this match and are asking for assistance.

To help our members have a safe and successful eHarmony experience, we provide you with our Safety Tips. Tell-tale signs, such as asking for money or help with personal business, are listed on our Safety Tips page. I encourage you to review this page so you can read through the whole list of warning-sign behaviors. You can access this page from the link at the bottom of all our Singles site pages or by clicking here: http://www.eharmony.com/safety/tips

Also, you will see that, at the bottom of our Safety Tips, we ask that you not hesitate to e-mail matchconcerns@eharmony.com to advise us of any and all match concerns. So, if you haven't already done so, please report the match's name and location along with your concerns, and a member of our Office of the President will follow-up with you.

All the best,

-Renee
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Hurricane_Em is offline Hurricane_Em Post #3  May 26,2009, 2:48pm
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I've got one I'm wondering about as well; he said he's in grad school for a certain program, but that university doesn't have that specific graduate major. Makes me wonder, I admit. I even verified it to make sure--no PhD in that major .

I think the object is to be careful; verify what you can and just be aware.
 
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GILKEY is offline GILKEY Post #4  May 27,2009, 9:06am
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I had one match "read me the riot act" in her second E-mail after we met. Of the 6 matches I actually met in person she is the only one I wish I hadn't. She said she and a friend signed up and paid their money for their memberships "just as a joke or dare."
 
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GILKEY is offline GILKEY Post #5  May 27,2009, 9:07am
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All of the other matches with whom I communicated by OPEN communication or other means were good people in my opinion.
 
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Hurricane_Em is offline Hurricane_Em Post #6  May 28,2009, 2:42pm
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Hurricane_Em wrote :
I've got one I'm wondering about as well; he said he's in grad school for a certain program, but that university doesn't have that specific graduate major. Makes me wonder, I admit. I even verified it to make sure--no PhD in that major .

I think the object is to be careful; verify what you can and just be aware.
Update--he had a reasonable explanation, so no scam. Information verified and accepted.
 
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Mr. Nice Guy is offline Mr. Nice Guy Post #7  May 29,2009, 8:52am
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Well, as it turns out, there was a problem with this particular match. eHarmony Customer Care replied back saying that they had investigated the matter and had taken appropriate steps based on their investigation. They also removed the match from the list of matches on my account.

So as I suspected, I was correct that there was something to be concerned about with this particular match. My instincts just told me I should be concerned, so I guess I must have good instincts. ;-)

And do you know what else? Now that I had already given this particular match my e-mail address BEFORE I had any concerns, the match keeps sending me one e-mail per day. And to think that I use Gmail and in Gmail there is currently no way to block a specific sender. You can set up a filter to automatically delete messages from a specific sender, but you cannot actually block the messages from a sender or from a domain.

This match is still e-mailing me after a few days and is making no reference to the fact that I have not responded any further to "her" e-mails for awhile. "She" just keeps on talking in "her" happy go-lucky way as if there is nothing wrong. Weird, eh? See what I mean. ;-|

Caio for now.
 
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dool889 is offline dool889 Post #8  May 29,2009, 9:49am
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This happened to me one time. I actually did not suspect this at first but as I continued to ask specific questions in my emails (in order to give them something to talk about) the questions would never get answered. Eventually I just googled their email address and got some scam warnings. Next I googled some quotes from their emails and found that it was word for word identical with a scam out there.

simply being cautious and googling can save you a lot of heartache.
 
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Mr. Nice Guy is offline Mr. Nice Guy Post #9  May 29,2009, 9:49am
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Well, as it turns out, there was a problem with this particular match. eHarmony Customer Care replied back saying that they had investigated the matter and had taken appropriate steps based on their investigation. They also removed the match from the list of matches on my account.

So as I suspected, I was correct that there was something to be concerned about with this particular match. My instincts just told me I should be concerned, so I guess I must have good instincts. ;-)

And do you know what else? Now that I had already given this particular match my e-mail address BEFORE I had any concerns, the match keeps sending me one e-mail per day. And to think that I use Gmail and in Gmail there is currently no way to block a specific sender. You can set up a filter to automatically delete messages from a specific sender, but you cannot actually block the messages from a sender or from a domain.

This match is still e-mailing me after a few days and is making no reference to the fact that I have not responded any further to "her" e-mails for awhile. "She" just keeps on talking in "her" happy go-lucky way as if there is nothing wrong. Weird, eh? See what I mean. ;-|

Caio for now.
 
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Mr. Nice Guy is offline Mr. Nice Guy Post #10  May 29,2009, 12:44pm
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Ooops. Duplicate posts. This is due to some error messages I received on these boards. Mods, if you don't mind, please fix this. Thank you. :-)
 
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