Wildflower9 is offline Wildflower9 Post #1  May 19,2009, 1:50pm
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I've been with eH for about a week and, so far, I'm very pleased with the number of matches I've received. I'm doing my best to be open minded and communicate with them. For the most part, they seem like a pretty decent bunch of guys. The problem is, I have absolutely no interest in any of them! I have the option of moving to OC with a couple and I have nothing to say. I'm hoping this means that the right one just hasn't come along yet. Any thoughts ... ?
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #2  May 19,2009, 6:42pm
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Wildflower9,

If you have no interest in them, and truly feel that you don't have it in you to get to know them, then close them out. eHarmony will send you more matches, and hopefully one of them will catch your interest.

Best of luck.
 
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eH_Advice_Host_Kate is offline eH_Advice_Host_Kate — Advice Official Moderator Post #3  May 19,2009, 7:04pm

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Hi Wildflower9,

I’m sure when you’re getting new matches there’s a sense of anticipation, and maybe disappointment when the matches you received don’t seem like good candidates to you – especially at the beginning. It’s very natural to feel this way. It’s our goal, after all, to find one “matchless match” for you. And that can take time. Actually, our Success Stories report that it took them an average of 3 – 6 months before they found the right person. For some it takes less or more time than this.

One thing you might consider is that some people don’t always convey themselves through the Internet as they might in person. They might be more attractive or interesting in person. But, as Tbesq said, if you really know it’s a definite “no”, it’s a kindness to close the match sooner rather than later.

Good luck and welcome to eHarmony Advice!

~Kate
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DDjr is offline DDjr Post #4  May 20,2009, 7:48am
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WF,

As much as EH tries and as much as we might like to be really interested in all our matches, the fact is it just doesn't work that way.

Give it three months - try to be open minded. After three months if you still feel like you're batting zero then we have other suggestions for you.
 
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eH_Advice_Host_Kate is offline eH_Advice_Host_Kate — Advice Official Moderator Post #5  May 20,2009, 8:28am

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Another thing that I should mention…

If you are new to eHarmony or would like help with maximizing your settings, contacting our Customer Care team is a great idea. They can spot things in your settings that you might not have known could eliminate worthy candidates. They will also go you’re your profile and give suggestions. Here’s the link: http://help-singles.eharmony.com/

You also might be interested in our interactive “About Me” workshops on the discussion boards:

http://advice.eharmony.com/boards/da...ate-about.html

http://advice.eharmony.com/boards/da...-thankful.html

All the best,

Kate
eHarmony Advice Host
 
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Wildflower9 is offline Wildflower9 Post #6  May 20,2009, 9:58am
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Good advice, thank you. I'll take another look at my settings and check out the workshops.
 
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mari3434 is offline mari3434 Post #7  October 19,2009, 12:50am
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I'm in the same boat with all EH matches I have received - no interest.
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is offline Gr8Guyn2008 Post #8  October 19,2009, 7:07am
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mari3434 wrote :
I'm in the same boat with all EH matches I have received - no interest.
While this thread was started 6 months ago and the OP has not been around in a while, both her post and yours raises a question in my mind. Why are you on eHarmony?

You are matched based on the 29 Dimensions of Compatibility. These are determined by the answers you provided when you filled out the Personality Profile Questionnaire. If you thought that it was a joke then you will be matched with jokes.

All of your matches will meet the 29 Dimensions, your settings will only filter them further. What you put in your profile does not matter with respect to who you are matched with. It is an introduction of you to your matches.

If you are approaching eHarmony (or any other site) with the view that they are going to drop the love of your life in your lap you have set yourself up for disappointment. If you have come to eHarmony or dating in general with a long list of requirements then you have set yourself up for failure. Look at what really matters, if he uses drugs that may well be a deal breaker but if he has a certain color hair does that really reflect on who he is as a person?
 
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