2007eggplant is offline 2007eggplant Post #1  December 7,2007, 12:34am
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I was placed on hold by a member because he was pursuing another match and might want the opportunity to communicate with me again. We were doing fine until it came to open communication. I'm wondering if I should just close him out or keep him? I live on an island and since I started eharmony, I got a huge surge of matches, and well, I'm not getting any now.

I'm a little irritated that I've been put on the "back burner" because there's someone else he's interested in. I'm not sure I understand the "hold" process and wanted to hear others opinions about it.

Thanks!
 
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Serenity is offline Serenity Post #2  December 7,2007, 11:29am
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I have only one match in my box that has no caution flags going up in my head, and I'm on hold. I actually told him to put me on hold because we were at the open communication stage and he wrote me and told me he had met another match, wanted to see her again, and wasn't comfortable pursuing two interests at one time. I respect that he doesn't want to pursue two at once, and although I'm bummed that he met another match before we got a chance to meet, I know there's a chance it may not work out, and I would still like the opportunity to get to meet him. If we closed, then there's no hope. I'm not taking it personally. It is a meeting service (or dating, whatever you want to call it), and it's just the nature of the forum.
 
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MW77009 is offline MW77009 Post #3  December 20,2007, 1:24pm
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The hold thing is a big red flag. They are basically asking you to wait for them to deal with someone with whom they have more interest. My life is too busy for me wait around for anyone. That is why I close them out when they pull that junk.

Mark W
 
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Bobby is offline Bobby Post #4  December 20,2007, 4:53pm
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I never have, and never will, use the "hold" feature. It just doesn't make sense to me at all and I wonder why the heck it's there. My view is basically the same as MW77009. I've never been put on "hold", but if I were, I'd just close the match and say buy bye.
 
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max50 is offline max50 Post #5  December 31,2007, 7:56pm
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I don't know how hold works - if your put on hold, or put someone on hold, is there a chance to say why?
 
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Bree1 is offline Bree1 Post #6  February 21,2008, 4:23pm
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If you put someone on hold you say why you have done so. Once you have put some on hold you can take them off by re-opening the match.



The hold feature can sometimes be a cop-out. Other times a match may not have the profile filled out and the other person is interested but he/she would like to see more info.
 
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ScottK is offline ScottK Post #7  February 21,2008, 6:24pm
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Bobby,45719 wrote :
I never have, and never will, use the "hold" feature. It just doesn't make sense to me at all and I wonder why the heck it's there. My view is basically the same as MW77009. I've never been put on "hold", but if I were, I'd just close the match and say buy bye.
Yup. Same here.

The ONLY time I would accept a Hold without Closing them out in response, is if their profile is SO GOOD or they are SO HOT that I am willing to sit on her backburner, just in case. =)
 
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nwoasis is offline nwoasis Post #8  February 21,2008, 6:37pm
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The only time I ever put someone on hold is if it's a profile that really interests me but there's no photo posted. I remember when I first signed onto eharmony a few months ago that my profile posted before my pictures did. So I did the whole questionnaire, filled out the profile along with pictures and then received my matches some of which had actually already closed me for no picture. So I try to keep that in mind. Sometimes I'll just wait a few days and sometimes I'll place them on hold and indicate the reason as no picture.
 
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chrlesmd is offline chrlesmd Post #9  February 22,2008, 6:30pm
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That's the one thing about eharmony that I really dislike. Why would anyone expect someone they don't know or never met to wait. Seems arrogant. Anytime I get placed on hold, I close it out regardless of what their profile says or how they look.
 
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grmrsan is offline grmrsan Post #10  March 10,2008, 11:33am
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I tried posting this as a new topic, but for some reason it got moderated out. I've never been put on hold. If I put someone on hold because they haven't responded to my communications, do they have the option of telling me they're still alive? Or is it completly a one way button like the closed matches are?
 
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