pureplem is offline pureplem Post #1  April 19,2008, 7:18am
pureplem's Avatar

needs a road trip

Enthusiast

Joined: Apr 2008

Texas

Posts: 733

See profile

My job has many negative stereotypes. I am a truckdriver. I list myself as FedEx truckdriver, hoping the good name of FedEx will offset some of the preconceived notions. How many of you try to make your job sound better than it is, or at least put a more positive spin on it? do some of you look at the occupations of your matches and close them out because of what you think of thier profession? My job is very secure steady, and pays very, very well, but I worry that that my matches will think of some creepy guy they've seen on TV or in an interstate rest area. Thoughts?
 
  Reply With Quote
pureplem is offline pureplem Post #2  April 19,2008, 7:25am
pureplem's Avatar

needs a road trip

Enthusiast

Joined: Apr 2008

Texas

Posts: 733

See profile

Oops. I CAN spell "their"... even if I DO drive a truck!!![img]library/editor/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-tongue-out.gif[/img]
 
  Reply With Quote
Hlyn is offline Hlyn Post #3  April 19,2008, 7:32am
Hlyn's Avatar

has mastered the art of being in two places at once...

Enthusiast

Joined: Apr 2008

Ohio

Posts: 813

See profile



An interesting question! I have never closed on a match because of his occupation. I want to know more about why that person is a waiter/data entry person/telemarketer at age 46. Is he writing the Great American Novel? Is he a struggling but briliant artist? A poet? What's the scoop. There is more to a person than their job. Now...if he does one of those jobs because he tends to punch all his bosses in the chops or because that's the only job his parole officer could get for him....that would give me pause.



PS: My late brother was a truck driver and I have a good friend who just started to "drive the big rigs" - it was a job that he could do that would help him provide for his young family.



Oh...and my brother met his wife (another truck driver) because he liked the sound of her voice on the radio. They ended up flirting via the CB for a while (they followed similar routes) and then met at a truck stop. They eventually got married and began driving together. He passed away from a sudden and massive heart attack while they were on the road in Georgia. If she hadn't been a driver, too, he would have died alone amongst strangers - but - she was with him. The last words that he said to her were "I love you. I just wished we'd had more time."
 
  Reply With Quote
Sunny_Day is offline Sunny_Day Post #4  April 19,2008, 7:42am
Sunny_Day's Avatar

is at home.

Quick Study

Joined: Dec 2007

Thinking of some place warm.

Posts: 74

See profile

pureplem, wrote :
My job has many negative stereotypes. I am a truckdriver. I list myself as FedEx truckdriver, hoping the good name of FedEx will offset some of the preconceived notions.
Don't worry about offsetting preconceived notions. People have all sorts of prejudices, and one against an occupation is one of them. If they have these notions, then they're just ignorant---and you don't want to be with an ignorant woman, of course. Some women do place a high emphasis on a man's occupation, but not all do. Don't try to downplay your job, because that will seem like you're embarrassed about it.
 
  Reply With Quote
pureplem is offline pureplem Post #5  April 19,2008, 7:45am
pureplem's Avatar

needs a road trip

Enthusiast

Joined: Apr 2008

Texas

Posts: 733

See profile

No, I don't downplay it, for several reasons: it is what I do, not who I am; it is a very good job; and if someone really thinks they are "too good" to date a truckdriver, we probably wouldn't get along- even if I DIDN'T drive a truck!!
 
  Reply With Quote
Sunny_Day is offline Sunny_Day Post #6  April 19,2008, 7:52am
Sunny_Day's Avatar

is at home.

Quick Study

Joined: Dec 2007

Thinking of some place warm.

Posts: 74

See profile

pureplem,85705 wrote :
No, I don't downplay it, for several reasons: it is what I do, not who I am; it is a very good job; and if someone really thinks they are "too good" to date a truckdriver, we probably wouldn't get along- even if I DIDN'T drive a truck!!
Exactly!!![img]library/editor/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-laughing.gif[/img]
 
  Reply With Quote
RubyIU is offline RubyIU Post #7  April 19,2008, 8:12am
RubyIU's Avatar

Quick Study

Joined: Jan 2008

St. Louis, MO

Posts: 70

See profile



Education is really important to me, so I almost always get matched with guys in jobs that require a lot of education, but I've never closed a guy because of his job. I have *thought* about it but more because it didn't fit my lifestyle (aka - a bartender, I don't like bars).

Maybe women close you because they don't want someone who will be away from them on long trips? I don't have a stereotype in my mind about truckers - in fact, when my car broke down on a trip, far from home, a trucker immediately stopped and fixed the problem for me enough so that I'd get back home safely. This was before cell phones were so widespread. I can bet that if I ever broke down again, I could count on a trucker to help me again too.
 
  Reply With Quote
scorpio is offline scorpio Post #8  April 20,2008, 8:22am
scorpio's Avatar

Unregistered

Joined: Mar 2008

Posts: 2,262

See profile



It's true that many people tend to stereotype truck drivers, as well as many other types of occupations. I think that one of the main reasons stereotypes exist is because so many peopleare followers who tend to adhere tothe "norm" in their thinking and in their perceptions.

As an artist andsomeone who has oftenchosen the "unpopular" view,I have often been rejected, misunderstood and just plain old "dissed" becausesomeone had neatly "boxed" me based on my occupation. And, there have been times when I have unconsciously done thisvery same thingbythinking ofthe negative things I've heard abouta particular occupation.

Regardingyour beinga truck driver, you are providing a much needed service in this society.There will always be people who will attempt to minimize you based on what you do -ignore them. They are probably not theones who matter in your life, anyway.

For me, a person's interests and character are what tellsmore about him thanhis occupation does.Andcertain interests do tell a lot about someone'scharacter.For example, Iam turned off by men who huntbecause it lets me know that he stalks and kills animals without thinking about the fact that they, too, have feelings.

Regardless ofoccupation, mostpeoplehave other, more important qualities. When writing a profile, it is vital to know your best qualities and state them, so that you will, hopefully, draw the type of match you're looking for.
 
  Reply With Quote
scorpio is offline scorpio Post #9  April 20,2008, 8:34am
scorpio's Avatar

Unregistered

Joined: Mar 2008

Posts: 2,262

See profile

scorpio,86282 wrote :

It's true that many people tend to stereotype truck drivers, as well as many other types of occupations. I think that one of the main reasons stereotypes exist is because so many peopleare followers who tend to adhere tothe "norm" in their thinking and in their perceptions.

As an artist andsomeone who has oftenchosen the "unpopular" view,I have often been rejected, misunderstood and just plain old "dissed" becausesomeone had neatly "boxed" me based on my occupation. And, there have been times when I have unconsciously done thisvery same thingbythinking ofthe negative things I've heard abouta particular occupation.

Regardingyour beinga truck driver, you are providing a much needed service in this society.There will always be people who will attempt to minimize you based on what you do -ignore them. They are probably not theones who matter in your life, anyway.

For me, a person's interests and character are what tellsmore about him thanhis occupation does.Andcertain interests do tell a lot about someone'scharacter.For example, Iam turned off by men who huntbecause it lets me know that he stalks and kills animals without thinking about the fact that they, too, have feelings.

Regardless ofoccupation, mostpeoplehave other, more important qualities. When writing a profile, it is vital to know your best qualities and state them, so that you will, hopefully, draw the type of match you're looking for.
I would just like to add that no one canthink they are"too good" for you or "better than you" unless that thought already exists in your own mind.
 
  Reply With Quote
Shelby is offline Shelby Post #10  April 20,2008, 10:37am
Shelby's Avatar

said what she meant; meant what she said.

Veteran

Joined: Nov 2007

California

Posts: 1,885

See profile



I look at occupation as one component of the profile along with the photos and depth of the statements to assess whether there could be something intriguing for me. That said, I'd want to know how your job or career fulfills you since it takes such a large part of your day. Is it just a job? Or do you feel a sense of accomplishment and pride, giving a valued service to your customers, clients, guests, patients, whatever your field or business? Do you enjoy your work; is it interesting and challenging? Could you relate to what I do for my customers and my work values, my challenges and my successes?

Compatibility in occupational levels is not as important as understanding and respecting each another's contribution and work ethic, and how they mesh with your mutual goals, values and intention for a connected future together.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply


« "My Matches" may not be members? | Using eHarmony | open communication stage: help »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“Absolutely not. I have no idea why allowing gays to marry would affect anyone's lives, unless they're sexually insecure about themselves.” –  sun73

Join the “Did our President give up the election for a single issue?” discussion

“I learned that the woman's communication style has to fit mine or else it won't work.” –  sun73

Join the “Why do 40 yr olds still play games?” discussion

“Here's where to email if you think a match might be a fraud: matchconcerns@eharmony.com . Tell them the match's name and location so they can find them. If what's making you suspicious is an email ... ” –  Simplicity-2012

Join the “Match from another country...is he a "fraud"?” discussion

“I know you clarified you just want a general opinion on when people bring this subject up, but I'm going to give you both that and also what I believe you should do. The general idea most of the ... ” –  Herkemer

Join the “When is it time to discuss your position on having kids?” discussion

“And that's a very valid point. I get the feeling that eHarmony is keeping their price high to show they they are not cheap and therefore, their members are serious.It seems to me that combining the ... ” –  MicMan

Join the “Free Communication Weekend” discussion

“How long have you all been on EH? Thanks for the advice. I signed on in late April 2012 but have been on other dating sites in the past.” –  Simplicity-2012

Join the “New Here” discussion

“The only one that bothers me is the "they weren't his kids so meh ..." But there could be a whole world of story behind that. Like "she dumped me and it was painful and I hated losing the kids in ... ” –  Simplicity-2012

Join the “Yellow flags...To Proceed or not to proceed, that is the question?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 1:08pm.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0