squirrellover is offline squirrellover Post #1  November 8,2010, 11:15am
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What do *you* consider a success? Is it marriage? Engagement? Dating for x number of years? x number of months? Moving in together? Actually meeting someone that you want to see again (who wants to see you again too)?

For *you*, what is your gage of success?
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #2  November 8,2010, 11:54am

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squirrellover wrote :
What do *you* consider a success? Is it marriage? Engagement? Dating for x number of years? x number of months? Moving in together? Actually meeting someone that you want to see again (who wants to see you again too)?

For *you*, what is your gage of success?
First stage success is 6 months-1 year dating with only minor adjustments/disagreements. I was with somebody about a few short months, but it was filled with daily struggle of incompatibility, so that was a failure.

Second stage would be 1-2 years

Third stage would be marriage/engagement.

Fourth stage would be marriage but sleeping on the same bed lol
 
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TheThinker is offline TheThinker Post #3  November 9,2010, 6:30am
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squirrellover wrote :
What do *you* consider a success? Is it marriage? Engagement? Dating for x number of years? x number of months? Moving in together? Actually meeting someone that you want to see again (who wants to see you again too)?

For *you*, what is your gage of success?
Years ago I probably would have answered this question differently. But at this point in my life, I'd see success as being with someone who has similar values, a good sense of who they are and the willingness to share their life with me.
I also think of success in a realtionship as coming in increments...
If I starting dating someone exclusively and we aren't married, I don't see that as "unsuccessful", either...
No one has a crystal ball...
To that end, I view success as relative to how much the two people on the same page, how much they agree about where the relationship is and/or where it is going.
 
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Gators19 is offline Gators19 Post #4  November 16,2010, 8:50am
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Success? Hmmm. . .good question.

IMHO. . . it varies by the person. In a relationship involving two good willed people, it means enjoying similarities and accepting the differences regardless of the stage of the relationship. The yin-yang effect must be there or in other words--you need to have balance.

If it feels right no matter how busy you are...you find time for your significant other. The whole playing hard to get is simply games for young people. As you get older you realize what is important.

Bottomline: It's not where you are at or what you are doing that matters more but rather whom you spend quality time with. Besides, no amount of money, material things or good looks can make up for someone who is simply a jerk because they are the ones that can make anything you do or place you go a heaven or a hell.
 
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eH_Advice_Host_Renee is offline eH_Advice_Host_Renee Post #5  November 16,2010, 10:07am

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Hi squirrellover,

Great question and some great answers already!

Like Gators19, I do think it depends on the person; so it will be really interesting to hear what success means to various members. Also, I bet, like TheThinker, many members definitions have changed over time; so it would be great to hear about this evolution too.

Got to say I like PY-2's stage approach. That way you can enjoy your levels of success, whatever they may be, as you reach them, until you get to your ultimate goal! (PY_2, that 4th stage killed me!)

Looking forward to hearing how other members gage success.

All the best,

Renee
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p.s. squirrellover, will you be sharing yours?
 
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PY_2 is offline PY_2 Post #6  November 16,2010, 4:20pm

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eH_Advice_Host_Renee wrote :
Hi squirrellover,

Great question and some great answers already!

Like Gators19, I do think it depends on the person; so it will be really interesting to hear what success means to various members. Also, I bet, like TheThinker, many members definitions have changed over time; so it would be great to hear about this evolution too.

Got to say I like PY-2's stage approach. That way you can enjoy your levels of success, whatever they may be, as you reach them, until you get to your ultimate goal! (PY_2, that 4th stage killed me!)

Looking forward to hearing how other members gage success.

All the best,

Renee
eHarmony Advice Host

p.s. squirrellover, will you be sharing yours?
Thanks I forgot to add...stage zero: Finishing up a date and not get apprehended by police lol
 
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Seawitch is offline Seawitch Post #7  December 11,2010, 9:57am
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squirrellover wrote :
What do *you* consider a success? Is it marriage? Engagement? Dating for x number of years? x number of months? Moving in together? Actually meeting someone that you want to see again (who wants to see you again too)?

For *you*, what is your gage of success?
Excellent question. I am new to the online dating, so I don't have an answer for you. However, I look forward to good answers on this one.
 
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