My wife left a good husband for another man.

This is my story.


I met my ex-wife when she was single mother just out of a bad relationship. She had a two year old daughter and I really didn't think I wanted to date a single mother, too much responsibility for a single 25 year old man. She persued me hard, and convinced me, and I fell in love. Our courtship was fun and she was very giving and supportive of me.


Then we got married!!!!


I raised her daughter as my own, and the first year of our marriage was fine. She pressured me into buying a house, so we did against my better judgement. She got pregant with our son. We had too many bills so I had to work a second job, I was working 70 hours a week. She wanted a new car, I got it for her. She wanted a dog, then another dog, then this, then that. All of which I tried to provide for her.


Around year 2-1/2 she started to withdraw. Withdrew sex, would pull away when I hugged her. Wouldn't do anything I asked of her: make me lunch, wear her wedding rings, change her last name, make the bed, all I asked of her in a kind way to tell her how much it would mean to me if she did these things.


Year 4 we go to counseling. I go for two sessions and then the counselor wants to see just her. She wants to separate so I leave so we can "work things out" I stay at her parents house and she lives in our house. I find out she is having an affair in our house then entire time we are separated and now wants a divorce so she can continue this relationship. I am left broken and shatttered. She lied to everyone. She broke an unbreakable promise, and I am having a hard time coping.

This is my story.


I met my ex-wife when she was single mother just out of a bad relationship. She had a two year old daughter and I really didn't think I wanted to date a single mother, too much responsibility for a single 25 year old man. She persued me hard, and convinced me, and I fell in love. Our courtship was fun and she was very giving and supportive of me.


Then we got married!!!!


I raised her daughter as my own, and the first year of our marriage was fine. She pressured me into buying a house, so we did against my better judgement. She got pregant with our son. We had too many bills so I had to work a second job, I was working 70 hours a week. She wanted a new car, I got it for her. She wanted a dog, then another dog, then this, then that. All of which I tried to provide for her.


Around year 2-1/2 she started to withdraw. Withdrew sex, would pull away when I hugged her. Wouldn't do anything I asked of her: make me lunch, wear her wedding rings, change her last name, make the bed, all I asked of her in a kind way to tell her how much it would mean to me if she did these things.


Year 4 we go to counseling. I go for two sessions and then the counselor wants to see just her. She wants to separate so I leave so we can "work things out" I stay at her parents house and she lives in our house. I find out she is having an affair in our house then entire time we are separated and now wants a divorce so she can continue this relationship. I am left broken and shatttered. She lied to everyone. She broke an unbreakable promise, and I am having a hard time coping.

This is my story.


I met my ex-wife when she was single mother just out of a bad relationship. She had a two year old daughter and I really didn't think I wanted to date a single mother, too much responsibility for a single 25 year old man. She persued me hard, and convinced me, and I fell in love. Our courtship was fun and she was very giving and supportive of me.


Then we got married!!!!


She pressured me into buying a house, so we did against my better judgement. She got pregant with our son.She wanted a new car, I got it for her. She wanted a dog, then another dog, then this, then that. All of which I tried to provide for her.


Around year 2-1/2 she started to withdraw. Withdrew sex, would pull away when I hugged her. Wouldn't do anything I asked of her: make me lunch, wear her wedding rings, change her last name, make the bed, all I asked of her in a kind way to tell her how much it would mean to me if she did these things.

I am sorry for your pain. However in reading "your story", I found it interesting that just about every sentence started out with "She did this, she wanted that, she pressured you to do this, she persuaded you to do that...she..she... she.You even wrote that 'She got pregnant with our son". That was an interesting way to put it, as though her pregnancy occurred all by itself.


She wanted a new car, you got it for her, she wanted a dog. Everything is she, she she. Well "SHE" couldn't have done all of those things and couldn't have gotten away with all of that behavior by herself. What role did "YOU" play in her behavior? Were you an enabler?


I came away with the impression that you allowed ths woman to just walk all over you. Where was your backbone? People tend to use and abuse, and not respect people they can walk all over like a door mat. As perverse as it may seem, that's why the jerks always seem to have the women hanging all over them and the nice guys stay stuck in the 'nice guy buddy role. I don't condone that type of behavior, but it does exist.


You should have "manned up in that relationship, put your foot down and not give in to her demands like that. You should have set boundaries. You allowed her to control you and that is not how healthy relationships function. Remember the scenario of how the kid in the playground would give his lunch away in order to 'make friends?" The so-called friends were only as interested in him as long as he "paid" for their friendship. They were only interested in him as long as he remained of some use to them. That's what you had in your marriage. This is not a true marriage. You were only as useful to her as long as you had something of value to give to her.


Your wife started getting bored when you've given all of your resources. That type of relationship never works. People don't value you for 'you" but for what you can do for them. I think a few self-help books and counseling on your part so that you can learn to set boundaries, learn about the positive traits of a healthy relationship would prepare you to turn this hurtful experience into something you can learn from and prepare you to be ready to embrace the next relationship (and there will be others), in a healthy manner. A healthy relationship is a partnership, a give and take, not one person doing all of the giving and one person doing all of the taking.


Yes your wife sounds like a vampire who drained you dry of your emotions and resources.

Yep "she" did all that. Some of us fall in love with dirt bags, what can I say? It's getting up and starting over again and trying to make a life for ourselves that makes us stronger. I think this kid will be okay, but it hurts like hell.