Is it ever OK to date a friend's ex?


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cristie86 is offline cristie86 Post #1  January 19,2012, 8:08am
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Is it ever okay to date your friend's ex?

Whether it was that they were married and divorced? Dated for a few months? Or even a one night stand?

If this person could be your "The One", would you let it slip away just because someone you know had them before you did?
 
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Faraday is offline Faraday Post #2  January 19,2012, 8:13am
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It would depend on how good of a friend they are and if they are over that person...and what kind of relationship they had. If it was more than a few months, I'd opt out.
 
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Lucid is offline Lucid Post #3  January 19,2012, 8:27am
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Good morning girls.

I'd have to go with "No." on this one. I've been there and its hard on both friends and gets awkward for the ex in question. When this did happen, it was short lived and the relationship turned into "just a fling", and we're all still friends. In my case, my friend and his ex were still friends.
 
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cristie86 is offline cristie86 Post #4  January 19,2012, 8:41am
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Good afternoon Faraday and Lucid! How is Canada today?

I don't think that I would date a friend's ex. Mostly, because I think my friends (all 3 of them) have horrible taste in me, IMO. One is dating my brother (ewww), another is into "thugs" and the other likes men that would do WHATEVER she asks. I don't know that I have my own "type" but if I did, those aren't it!

Would asking permission before hand be any easier? I guess the "ackwardness" of the situation would always be there, huh? Imagine the wedding!!!
 
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BikerBeagle is offline BikerBeagle Post #5  January 19,2012, 1:29pm
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cristie86 wrote :
Is it ever okay to date your friend's ex?
Nope ...at least not if you plan to continue being friends.

There are 6 billion people on the planet, one or two of them won't be your friends' ex ...
 
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nick222 is offline nick222 Post #6  January 19,2012, 4:28pm
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It's often okay, but if the friendship is more important the the dating potential you want to discuss it with the friend first to see if they're okay with it.
 
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cristie86 is offline cristie86 Post #7  January 19,2012, 4:50pm
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I still think it would be weird. Whether you have their blessing or not. That's just me though.
 
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Buck is online now Buck Post #8  January 19,2012, 7:27pm
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A few years back, me and my GF at the time spent the weekend at a Spring Barrel Tasting event. Eventually we ended up hanging out with three other couples, and I was the only person of the 8 who hadn't been previously married to someone else in this group. It was most unusual to say the least, but I did not discern any difficulties. Maybe it was the wine. Did I mention we were camping in her ex-husband's driveway?
 
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cristie86 is offline cristie86 Post #9  January 19,2012, 7:48pm
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Wow! Buck, I think I'd probably run off into the woods at that point. Lol! If you hadn't been drinking, I would've asked how it was, but thats probably a minor detail you've overlooked... Lol!
 
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tink333 is offline tink333 — Advice Member-Moderator Post #10  January 19,2012, 7:59pm
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I always thought there was some sort of super secret unwritten rule to not ever, ever, ever do this - at least in the adult world. Back in HS, it just sort of happened that way, but those relationships lasted weeks not years.

And, no. I would never have considered dating a friend's ex.
 
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