My husband's lap dance...

Hello all,

Although I have never posted here before, I met my husband on eharmony and thought it would be a great place to vent/seek advice.

My husband on almost a year travels a great deal for work. On his most recent trip, he went to a strip club with the boys. Although he didnt tell me beforehand (and actually told me he had gone to a "club" until he returned home), it wasn't a big deal. He doesn't frequent them, but has gone multiple times in the past and knows I can curb my jealousy for a fun boys night.
I also happen to be pregnant (my first), in my second trimester. I had mentioned casually before that although I don't gripe about him enjoying strip clubs, it might bother me when I'm pregnant because I know I no longer have a comperable body to those women he lusts after. He, of course, doesn't remember this conversation, but it still wasn't a big deal. I didn't even remind him and was glad he had fun, since my hurt feelings were brought on by my own insecurities.
HOWEVER, I found out he was getting lap dances (plural) that night. He didn't lie about it, but did not tell me right away. We have never talked about him receiving lap dances previously, but had the conversation of what we considered cheating multiple times. We both have agreed that any emotionally romantic feelings, conversations, touching, anything with anyone else was cheating and those feelings and actions were reserved for eachother. I assumed that included lap dances, but he claims he thought I knew that's what went on in strip clubs.
Am I just being naive to assume that my husband wasn't receiving lap dances? Maybe. However, it really upsets me that he wants other naked women grinding on top of him. My feelings are so hurt and I am insanely hormonal right now and just can't get over it. I don't want other men giving me that kind of attention, and I can't imagine loving him like I do and feeling that way. I feel so ugly and unattractive that I can't be enough for him (he was only out of town for 3 days). I also feel like he betrayed me and I feel cheated on, though I'm not sure if he saw it that way or not. I don't believe him when he says he loves me anymore, that's how emotional I am. I know it is partially the hormones, but it is still real for me.
We have an otherwise great relationship, never fight, very passionate and affectionate. However, that is ruined for me now (possibly the pregnancy hormones speaking). How would you guys react to this?

There was extreme grinding and touching of him by her. All parts on all parts of him. He even sat for multiple songs, which is so wierd and discomforting to me, but says to me that he was very turned on and enjoying it. This was a club where she got completely naken throughout the dance except for a string.

I cried and cried and cried, and he did listen and comfort me and apologize. However, now I just can't get over the fact that he wants a naked woman grinding on him, who is not me. I may be naive but I had no idea that he felt this way. I trusted his feelings for me and thought he felt how I did, which is that I don't want anyone but him. I trust him to not hook up with someonen else or anything, but I honestly donn't know if he just wont tell me next time he gets lap dances. He truly doesn't get it and thinks that he is a just a man and that's how men are. Is that true?
It's not that he acted on it, but that he wants it. Does that make sense?