5 Relationship Red Flags

5 Relationship Red Flags

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5 Relationship Red Flags


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beautiful_woman is offline beautiful_woman Post #61  April 1,2009, 11:36pm
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I have always heard that it's a big redflag when you date a guy and then he fast tracks the relationship and wants to marry you like after one or two dates (he's desperate or he wants to get his visa type of guy!) take off your heels and run for the hills girl!
 
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beautiful_woman is offline beautiful_woman Post #62  April 1,2009, 11:51pm
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shayster,390417 wrote :

dating a man 51 I am in my 40s but very much livng life i race a nascar stock cars I flag at route 66 speedway in chicago , work very hard raise 2 daughters 17, 13 alone, own a 240 thousand dollar home, own my car, boat, motorcyle .He on the other hand for 8 years has moved in with his parents not to help them, or they were sick but because he cant afford to have his own place , yet he owns nothing, last year he brought a 28,000 dollar truck 500 monthy payments no phone except cell phone no utiltys, pays no rent yet still cant move out he has a good job caterpillar in aurora illinis Don makes more money than me by far I am a good person and do not look down on anyone for what they have or have not , butt..... what is wrong with this picture ,he smokes pot everyday yet says he is not addicted, I have been with him 6 years found out a few years ago that he smokes every flipping day,he says he needs it to escape and trys to convince me that its no worse than booze and that it makes him feel happy,I have never known him not on pot, No I do not partake never have is that not addition? He suffers from depression I try to help him out of his dark hole but he pulls me in it with him, I told him I will help you out but dont suck up all my happy energy but here i am woundering wha t to do 6 years into it has not been perfect nor should it be , he has hit me 4 times , cheated and lies alotttt. If this was a friend of mine I would tell her to run fast not walk run, am I doing the right thing a few days from christmas I really dont wan to hurt him, But I need to save me , alone in chicgo shayster
Wow you are a brave angel! First I think you should recognize that you stayed in this not because you loved him, but because you were hoping to save him? Why do you want to stay in this relationship when he is not ready to be in one? he doesn't know himself, he doesn't try to be a better person for you, he lies a lot! (how can you trust him? how can you speak to him? live with him when he lies a lot?) my family also believes that you should look at someone for all the material things that they have, but then again, what if they have so much because they were doing easy or bad money business blank markets? You don't want that either. Slow things down, recover, try to spend less and less time with him, take a short vacation for yourself or with a best friend or with your mother or someone you trust! Smoking pot is usually the open door to all the collection of bad substance stuff, which leads to knowing badpeople, which leads to substance abuse which leads to him acting bad! Also, try to maintain a happy, healthy life, don't cling to people when your gut is telling you to run for the hills!
 
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GILKEY is offline GILKEY Post #63  April 2,2009, 8:57am
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The founder of E/H says two year minimum courtship period. It was just about exactly two years from the time my wife and I first met until our wedding. (matched 05/04 met 10/05, married 10/07.
 
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Uncle Apple is offline Uncle Apple Post #64  April 2,2009, 12:12pm
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I could name a few more, but don't want to take the time.
 
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zendba is offline zendba Post #65  April 5,2009, 10:02am
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At least I know E-Hell is consistent. Great advice...."nothing in common"...."checking other people out". Why not provide something more insightful, such as "you see them in a video having sex".


I truly feel for the people that actually rely on this advice.


Thank you for the morning laugh.
 
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kitwhit is offline kitwhit Post #66  April 7,2009, 5:32pm
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marthak,51678 wrote :

Was this article ever timely! I was just having second thoughts about ending a long-distance relationship with someone who told me a whopper of a lie for no reason. The gentleman explained several months of no communication with me by saying that his mother had died. It took two years for the truth to come out. Now I'm coping with the loss of what I thought was a growing friendship. Thankfully, your article is helping me bite the bullet and move on. If he told that one for no good reason, what would he do later?
I recently lost my husband and have been out of circulation for a whle. It is difficult to find


a good man...that believes you should have a relationship and get to know each other before you jump into bed with them. I am searching a gentleman and hopefully there are some out there. I love music, travel, people, reading, walks on the beach, love Aruba. Are there any dating groups in the Pasadena, Gibson Island, area?


Thank you for the assistance.


Kitty
 
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Ebony80 is offline Ebony80 Post #67  April 12,2009, 4:36am
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Great article, I got so much from it.
 
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SuzyQB is offline SuzyQB Post #68  April 19,2009, 1:08pm
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I wish I had read this article sooner. Unfortunately, I stayed with a guy that I had so much chemistry with. We were together the first time for about 6 months. Then he broke up with me because he thought we needed to "take a break." After that he told me how much he missed me, yada, yada, yada. So we got back together and seemed to be stronger than ever. Well, 7 months after that, he drops the bomb that he isn't in love with me. Here I am with a broken heart and feeling so used. I can't help but wonder WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME???
 
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Blond1 is offline Blond1 Post #69  April 28,2009, 4:28pm
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Great reminder of the things we turn a blind eye to when trying to make it work. Need to add " can't seem to get over his two previous (and both late) wives", "still keeps photos of thereally badlate ex hidden in his wallet" and "still refers to her mother as his mother-in-law and throws you under the bus when she is around." Ihated the fact that he oogledother women in front of me, especially the really young, hotones that couldbe his daughters friends.I spent years in therapy trying to figure out what was wrong with me, still not realizing that the answer to that question was "NOTHING"After years of taking care of his kids and parents I finally made a break and moved out. I'm slowlygetting my life back andit's not easyfor a womanover 50 to get back intoa"single" state of mind. I tell myself everymorning thatthe karma between us has been satisfied andmake mental notes on how I canmake my life better without taking someone elses needy behavior into consideration. It still hurts, sometimes badly, but it's only because I realize nowhow much of mylife Ispenton this guy thinking theremight be a happy ending, whenall I was really doing was wasting time on garbagedetail.
 
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BlueMerci is offline BlueMerci Post #70  April 30,2009, 7:28am
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I had red flags in my relationships and ignored them. It is not worth it. Years of heartache and trying to fix the other person, was a disaster. To top it off we have children so every time I tried to end it, he used the children as an excuse for me to stay. I am so glad I finally made the decison to go and the children are better off seeing Mom healthy and free from the abusive relationship.
 
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