how much affirmation do you need? give?


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notsoyoung is offline notsoyoung Post #1  November 2,2010, 8:38pm
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I'm the type of person who *needs* to say how much someone means to me...it's important to me. So, each day I tell my Honey how much I appreciate him, I tell him I think he's sexy, I tell him I love him...whatever.

Honey, on the other hand doesn't say any of this very often...he does show me how much he cares. He's so amazing and I truly appreciate all the little things he does for me.

We've talked about our differences in letting the other know how much we care. He thinks it's a guy/chick thing. I'm not so sure.

So, how much affirmation do you need? how much do you give?
 
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livinagin is offline livinagin Post #2  November 2,2010, 8:47pm
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I don't need much. I am the "quality time" chick. Read that book. Your boyfriend needs to read it too.

If you need affirmation, I can do that too. It really boils down to figuring it out for each other to make it last.
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #3  November 2,2010, 9:38pm
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I like to tell them all the time, every chance I get.

Sometimes I try to tone it down...for fear of causing a person embarrassment...but I like to let everybody know how "special" I think they are; I speak from the heart, whenever possible.

I have my fair share of fans...I'm not going to refuse a compliment, if one happens to come my way.

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livinagin is offline livinagin Post #4  November 2,2010, 9:59pm
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j0hn8andy wrote :
I like to tell them all the time, every chance I get.

Sometimes I try to tone it down...for fear of causing a person embarrassment...but I like to let everybody know how "special" I think they are; I speak from the heart, whenever possible.

I have my fair share of fans...I'm not going to refuse a compliment, if one happens to come my way.

j8a
Okay, we think you are wonderful. And beautiful. And funny and kind and . . . anything I missed, sweetie?
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #5  November 2,2010, 10:02pm
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I love my Friends!

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Last edited by j0hn8andy; November 2,2010 at 10:03pm. Reason: ...i really do...
 
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TiffanyDiamond is offline TiffanyDiamond Post #6  November 2,2010, 10:50pm
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I don't know that I "need" a lot of affirmation about my honey's feelings for me. Even if he never verbally expressed his feelings, he shows me every day how he feels about me and I can really feel it. I do know that we speak from the heart everyday and each morning before we start our day and each night before we go to bed we both express our love for one another. Also at any time during the day that we feel so compelled. It's not mushy or forced or "oh, he said it so I have to say it." It just flows from the heart.
 
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OlderButWiser0549 is online now OlderButWiser0549 Post #7  November 3,2010, 3:09am
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I have a pretty big appetite for giving and getting affirmations-- verbal or non-verbal, doesn't matter. Endearments, hugs, kisses, they all work.
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #8  November 3,2010, 3:48am
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Don't think it's a man/woman thing at all. I have a very low need for affirmation - actions, how we treat each other over all, underlying trust and respect, speak to me more than words. Oddly, a lot of guys I date are the opposite - very high need for constant affirmation. I find it both annoying and exhausting to deal with.
 
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Tipitina is offline Tipitina Post #9  November 3,2010, 4:08am
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DancingFool wrote :
Don't think it's a man/woman thing at all. I have a very low need for affirmation - actions, how we treat each other over all, underlying trust and respect, speak to me more than words. Oddly, a lot of guys I date are the opposite - very high need for constant affirmation. I find it both annoying and exhausting to deal with.
I'm low on the need spectrum, too -- I certainly want the trust, respect and occasionally "hey, you're great," but constant compliments make me uneasy. My experience has been that the guys who give them have a high expectation of getting them back in equal quantity. Not surprisingly, I'm more likely to show my admiration by action than by words.

I understand that people need to hear the words, but it's frustrating when I'm told it's disappointing I don't match compliments one to one.
 
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Mythical is offline Mythical Post #10  November 3,2010, 4:39am
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Most people will say they don't need much affirmation, but in reality they do. That's my theory... and I'm sticking to it. I do think actions speak louder than words, though.

It's not a guy/girl thing really. It's just that way different people are.
 
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