Being truthful about sex

Let's say sex for men = affection for women.
So, maybe the men are right from the get-go.

I am having a hard time wrapping myself around the concept that a guy can be great - perfect - in all ways and a "dud" in bed.

For a guy to be a dud in bed, well, given the many different ways he can satisfy a woman, he'd have to be intentionally not trying or not wanting to try to satisfy her. In that event, then that is an intentional act and I would have to call it off.

I mean, if it simply is that the man can't get the direction going, then that is one thing and can be remedied by all the other ways a man can satisfy a woman.

So I'd have a hard time seeing this happening, but I can see a scenario where it would.

I just reealllly wanted to quote this part. Also I'd like to add that I know I'm wrong, I'm sorry in advance and yes dear you were right all along to any woman that disagrees with me.

Reading this, the first question that pops in my mind would be: Wouldn't that still leave you wanting for more?

What I'm trying to figure out, is the woman's perspective in this... because from my own point view, if I were to be with a partner who was unable to satisfy me during sex (thank goodness that hasn't happened I guess heh... here's to hoping it never will!), and therefore had to resort to other methods to pleasure me, it feels like I'd be a bit disappointed with the whole thing eventually.

Don't get me wrong, it's an excellent compromise to make up for the lack of skill in sex, but it seems as though it's the type of thing that you'd find more women are able to live with than men would be (and thankfully I guess, since it seems like it's a problem for more women than men to begin with).

At the end of the day though, I think I could see myself being able to live with the above situation. Come to think of it, I guess it's a continuous way of her showing she cares. Hmmm. How sweet!

Anyways, summing up the question then: To the women... if you were with a man, who was unable to satisfy you during sex, but made up for it by doing so otherwise... Would you think of said man as a sex dud? (and therefore end it?) Or would you consider yourself in a sexually satisfying relationship?

Being sexually compatible is VERY important...but my experience with great sex, came from someone who really cared about me, and was into me, and visa versa. I feel that online dating pushes the fast forward button for men. They want to know right away if you are sexually compatible. Even before there are any emotions established between you! In my opinion, how can you know if someone is a good match sexually on the first date???

Here's where I need advice. My experience with online dating is, the men tend to bring in sexual conversation on the first date. I consider myself a sensual person, but I am not someone who wants to "try out people" to see what they are like unless I have a connection with them. So, I think I am giving out the wrong signals on the first dates, because I get uncomfortable when men do this. I am sure my body language says that, and that is a turn off for them.

The dates that I do feel the "sexual click" I refrain from giving signals that I want to sleep with them, because I want the man to see me as a person, not a sexual conquest.

Should I respond to the their sexual conversation with a question? LIke, why are you talking about sex, I hardly know you? or something like that?

I'm not sure you understood my point. From the post I was quoting, the poster was saying that even if a man was unable to satisfy a woman during sex (in this case, it is implied that she's talking about climaxing... regardless of how many times) that they could make up for this "lack of skill" by satisfying their partner otherwise (again, regardless of number of times). The assumption of course, again, is that this is done orally or by touch.

I'm saying that as a man, I'd probably feel a little underwhelmed by this over an extended period of time. I think I could still live with it (hypothetically), but still underwhelming nonetheless. And the question is: Would a woman feel differently?

The only time I mentioned this being more of a problem for women than men, was when I was addressing the situation as a whole... Meaning... I think you would find more women that have not climaxed during sex, because of a lack of partner's skills, than you would find men who have not. Again, number of times would not play into this.