She's stepping back to think about things


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JaJae is offline JaJae Post #41  May 16,2010, 12:59pm
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RoxyRedhead wrote :
Many many assumptions in this post-plus a lot of gamesmanship too.

First, she might not come back..To assume she will is simply your experience and in no way reflects on every woman in this situation..myself for example.

I suspect many women/men who ask to have space are asking just for space. This is a busy woman with a lot going on. Lets just assume she was being honest here-that things have moved too fast and she is not ready for commitment. She may or may not decide to seek you out again, but that shouldn't prevent you from being friendly.

As for my opinion, if you haven't heard from her in 3 weeks, nothing would be lost by a polite email hoping she is doing well and saying you are doing well also. Thats just being friendsl-after all you were into the I Love Yous already!

3-5 months is the usual time for a relationship to run..if it isn't *The One*, then that gives both parties time to get to know each other, discover that all isn't what they wish for and break things off.

Try to not be in such a rush for the I L Y and give yourself and the woman some time to learn about each others good and bad points. For the first couple of months, were in the Honeymoon stage..all is roses and rainbows. It takes time for the negatives to appear. Patience...
He has no logical reason to assume she will come back to him. If she had intentions of getting back together she would have been more communicative during the past month. Nobody is too busy to shoot an e-mail or extend a phone call if they really wanted to. If his feelings and their relationship were more important to her she would have extended an olive branch by now. She hasn't. That almost certainly means she is moving on. He should do the same and should not sit around and wait hoping for the best from someone who has chosen to exclude him from her life.
Last edited by JaJae; May 16,2010 at 1:01pm.
 
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GentleDoc is offline GentleDoc Post #42  July 30,2010, 11:28am
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webbjs wrote :
Thanks all. Specifically lilypeach and truthaboutcupid though, I thought your observations and recommendations are spot on how I am and should be thinking of this right now. I'm absolutely prepared for a breakup, but I still hold out hope. I'm not going to go searching new profiles or picking up new women quite yet, but I'm mentally in a place to get back out there soon. Thanks again, and I'd love to hear any other opinions as well.
If you're "not going to go searching new profiles or picking up new women quite yet" because you need some time to heal or regroup, that's fine. If you're not doing that because you're waiting for her, then you're causing yourself needless pain.

Also, the funny thing is, the more you take your mind off of her and live your life, the more likely she is to contact you again. It actually works that way! So, by going on with life, you win either way! Can't beat that with the proverbial stick, can you?
 
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