Isn't the relationship about synergy between two people in the areas of spiritual, mental, emotional, and physical chemistry and notwhat she or he may or may not have materially and / or financially?

Many have met and married right after college and started off married life together bare bones as have those who didn't go to college.Material things are not a good indicatorofwhat goes into making up a wonderful, life-long marriage and one only has to see that from the recent "You Tube" rant of of Tricia Walsh-Smith against her wealthy husband, Philip Smith, or the former govenor of New York, Elliot Spitzer and his wife, Silda Wall Spitzer. They had money, power, seemingly everything material!

Yes, while it is true that one can't live on lovealone, over time, as each person is getting to know the other, finances - including how one manages their money, how the person views money, and those kinds of things, will need to be addressed in any serious relationship, among many other things.

Money is not the end all and be all of everything. If it were than Elizabeth Taylor should have been very happy in any of her many marriages as should Jacqueline Kennedy Onassis to Aristotle!

Marrying for money never works and more people need to realize that. Things of importance in life are character qualities like honesty, integrity, dependability, commitment, having the ability to resolve conflict, being hard-working, having core values, being kind, treating others as you wish to be treated, helping others, raising strong families. None of these things are dependent on money.

Yes, having enough money to pay the bills is nice and would that it were so for everyone in the world.

There's been a resurgence in recent years where the couple has chosen for the wife to stay home and take care of the family and children! On the news yesterday was a piece about this very thing where couples have found the cost of childcare, work wardrobe, the extra car and gas, and work-related expenses do not even make it worthwhile for the wife to work.Manycouples have chosenfor the wife not to work and they're all somuch happier with that decision than when the wife was working.

Many women find they really want to return to homemaking, at least when their family is young, and do so, leading happy and fulfilling lives.

I've personally heard a good number of couples say it's just too stressful on the household when both are working and trying to raise a family.Life is just too frantic they say.

I'm really grateful to have been ina family where my mother was home when I got home from school and I didn't have to go to some babysitter or childcare place. It gave me such security and stability, and I still remember the smell of homemade bread permeating the kitchen when I'd walk in the door. Plus, my mother had lots of opportunity to teach and train her children, unlike many parents who are frenzied with their ultra-busy lives. I could make a piefrom scratch when I was eight years old andiron my dad's white shirts! I knew how to be mannerly and carry on a conversation with an adult and I was already well on my way to having a good work ethic. Most 8-year olds hardly know how to do anything.

It's much more beneficial for children to have that stability and security in their families than that other income. There's many free things one can do with their children and just being there with them is vital to their well-being.

When two people are working all day and exhausted, who really feels like coming home and making a nice home-cooked meal for their family? Who feels like doing the household chores after a full work day? Who feels like being intimate with their spouse after work, chores, and kids? Kids get snapped at as does the spouse by the other and people's lives just crumble many times as everyone is trying to do too much and is chronically exhausted as a result.

It's not coincidence that the divorce rate has surged sinceboth person in a marriagestarted working, perhaps trying to go to school too, and raising a family on top of it all. It makes life way too stressful!

Making a choice to have less income as a family, but have a less harried life, with more time to "smell the roses," usually makes for a much better marriage and family life.

Single parents have it really, really hard and my heart goes out to them.

There's always going to be disproportionate salaries in any relationship. Everyone wants someone to want him or her for himself or herself. If a person marries for money, then what happens to the relationship when there's a possible fortune reversal, stock market downturn,or a person loses their job? Anyone who marries for money gets what he or she deserves! It's a mistake. Don't do it. Don't even have it as one of your top 5 criteria. There's so many things so much more important in relationships, and money is not one of them, though money issues are one of the top two reasonsfor divorce; sex being the other.

These are just some of the reasons why it's really important to get to know the other person over time and see how each is in all kinds of moods and different situations. These things just cannot be hurried and as the relationship deepens, it's so very important to take the time to discuss many, many things at length including finances - who will balance the checkbook, when will a house be purchased, what is the other's thoughts on credit, spending, saving, etc.; possible children - how many and how soon; where the couple will live; how long will each work; sex; extended family; etc.

As always, these things should all be discussed at great length in any serious relationship and in pre-marital counseling, too,which is an absolutemust before any marriage takes place. A good pre-marital counselor will give each couple an assessment that each will take and then cover everything in many sessions. Usually, there's workbooks and written material. Marriage is serious business, a lifetime commitment, and should not ever be hurried into.

Again, look to the person, not their money, and see what the person is all about and whether he or she would be good marriage material. Having money does NOT make a person good marriage material particularly! Things like, being hard working, saving some of their income, being careful with credit, are just a few of the many, many things that go into making a person a good relationship candidate.

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