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nightling nightling is offline
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From my morning readings ... This is a list of what each gender views as showing you love them. Of course there are many differences based on individuals, this was some sort of aggregate study. But it's still interesting to note the similarities and the little differences between the sexes in the language of love.

For men, in order of importance

taking walks together
kissing
candle-lit dinners
cuddling
hugging
flowers
holding hands
making love
love letters
sitting by the fireplace

For women, in order of importance.

taking walks together
flowers
kissing
candle-lit dinners
cuddling
declaring "I love you"
love letters
slow dancing
hugging
surprise gifts
- November 20th, 2009, 10:09 am
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jayjay jayjay is offline
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Is your list under 'men' what makes them know their partner loves them...or showing their partner? If the former....that doesn't seem especially accurate to me. Taking walks together #1? I take walks with women who are just friends....that doesn't imply love to me at all. Also....I think for most men 'making love' would be higher than #8.

One I'd add, at least for myself, is just talking quietly looking into each other's eyes.
- November 20th, 2009, 10:28 am
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I always thought for men it has always been:

Fetch'em beer
Dress sexy for them
When it comes to s-e-x, give them options: Lights on or off
Morning beejer
Noon beejer
Evening beejer (after you fetch'em beer)
Sitting in front of the TV (and honey, I like my grilled sammich extra crispy).

These are not necessarily my preference
- November 20th, 2009, 11:46 am
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- November 20th, 2009, 12:07 pm
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lol
- November 20th, 2009, 12:08 pm
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nightling nightling is offline
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jayjay wrote :
Is your list under 'men' what makes them know their partner loves them...or showing their partner? If the former....that doesn't seem especially accurate to me. Taking walks together #1? I take walks with women who are just friends....that doesn't imply love to me at all. Also....I think for most men 'making love' would be higher than #8.

One I'd add, at least for myself, is just talking quietly looking into each other's eyes.
I think each list was meant to be what the gender sees as showing/getting love.

I don't know about the accuracy of the list. It was a self-reported thing from long-term partners and reflects what they did together to feel close to each other and demonstrate love. I also wouldn't be all that interested in some of the things on the woman's list.

I would think making love should be higher on the list for men, and that it should probably appear in the women's list, but different strokes for different folks I guess.
Last edited by nightling; November 20th, 2009 at 12:41 pm.
- November 20th, 2009, 12:24 pm
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Mokkesofie Mokkesofie is online now
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nightling wrote :
I would think making love should be higher on the list for men, and that it should probably appear in the women's list, but different strokes for different folks I guess.
Was exactly what I thought as well.
Plus, holding hands doesn't appear on the list for women either which I find strange.
- November 20th, 2009, 12:49 pm
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Yeah-I see this for long term partners......after 10 yearsor so, walking together after work, watching the sun set and talking because huge on DH and M to-do list.
Long term partners have to keep working on the kissing part, IMO-it can get to be a hi/smooch bye/smooch nite/smooch. In the rush of daily hassle necking/ just plain sitting on the couch and necking, goes away. Which is a shame.
And, long term (wonder at the age of the couples here?) sex can become less important for so many reasons..the least of which is illness or drugs that inhibit the libido.
However I don't see this list as valid for young new couples with less that 3 years together.
JMO
- November 20th, 2009, 01:32 pm
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nightling wrote :
I think each list was meant to be what the gender sees as showing/getting love.

I don't know about the accuracy of the list. It was a self-reported thing from long-term partners and reflects what they did together to feel close to each other and demonstrate love. I also wouldn't be all that interested in some of the things on the woman's list.

I would think making love should be higher on the list for men, and that it should probably appear in the women's list, but different strokes for different folks I guess.
Ok...so maybe the men had to fill out the survey in front of their partners and this affected their responses.

Incidentally, I've been in a LTR for as long as 6 years....and sex never became 'less important'.
- November 20th, 2009, 05:26 pm
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PY_2 wrote :
I always thought for men it has always been:

Fetch'em beer
Dress sexy for them
When it comes to s-e-x, give them options: Lights on or off
Morning beejer
Noon beejer
Evening beejer (after you fetch'em beer)
Sitting in front of the TV (and honey, I like my grilled sammich extra crispy).

These are not necessarily my preference
It seems to be missing "fetch another beer"
- November 20th, 2009, 08:01 pm
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