Rhianna speaks out on domestic violence (interesting!)


Reply
  • Page 1 of 2
  • 1
  • 2
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #1  November 5,2009, 12:01pm
eHA_Admin_Lor…'s Avatar

My one wish for you, is love. :)

Moderator

Joined: Nov 2008

Santa Monica, CA

Posts: 5,120

See profile

Video: Rihanna Breaks Her Silence! (Tears Up On When Speaking On Chris Brown Hitting Her)

I found this excerpt from the interview with Rhianna to be really interesting in particularly one respect:

-She blames herself for her situation, for "falling in love with that kind of person". I'd actually never heard a victim articulate that specifically -- I've heard them say they egged their abuser on, etc. (often convinced of that by the abuser), but never that they blamed themselves for falling in love.

Do you think many victims feel that way? If so is that part of why they stay in these abusive relationships far too long, often with deadly consequences?

Overall, do you think Rhianna's speaking out will have a much-needed impact on women currently living in a violent household?
Last edited by eHA_Admin_Lori; November 5,2009 at 2:00pm.
 
  Reply With Quote
eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #2  November 5,2009, 12:02pm
eHA_Admin_Lor…'s Avatar

My one wish for you, is love. :)

Moderator

Joined: Nov 2008

Santa Monica, CA

Posts: 5,120

See profile

Oops, forgot to add a link to an article about this as well:

Rihanna speaks: 'Love is so blind' - CNN.com
 
  Reply With Quote
Dugl is offline Dugl Post #3  November 5,2009, 2:13pm
Dugl's Avatar

is happy.

Pacesetter

Joined: Sep 2009

Posts: 441

See profile

eHA_Admin_Lori wrote :
Overall, do you think Rhianna's speaking out will have a much-needed impact on women currently living in a violent household?
No....there are psychological issues involved that cannot be cured by a suggestion from a pop singer. If it were that easy....siblings, parents and friends of victims would be eligible for Sainthood.
 
  Reply With Quote
D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #4  November 5,2009, 2:31pm
D_Lion's Avatar

- Ladies want to wring my neck - you have been warned!

Sage

Joined: Aug 2008

Posts: 31,680

See profile

Any and every two-party dynamic involves two parties.

It appears to be settled data that some persons choose to date aggressive / assaultive persons repetitively, implying a preference for such persons.
 
  Reply With Quote
melman is offline melman Post #5  November 5,2009, 3:00pm
melman's Avatar

Virtuoso

Joined: Aug 2009

Posts: 2,944

See profile

I have absolutely no idea who this is.
 
  Reply With Quote
tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #6  November 5,2009, 5:01pm
tweet37's Avatar

has all the tools and can........satisfy

Power Poster

Joined: Sep 2008

New Jersey

Posts: 7,608

See profile

Yeah...what's a Rhianna?
 
  Reply With Quote
D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #7  November 5,2009, 5:05pm
D_Lion's Avatar

- Ladies want to wring my neck - you have been warned!

Sage

Joined: Aug 2008

Posts: 31,680

See profile

A celebrity, I think.
 
  Reply With Quote
Bluemay2 is offline Bluemay2 Post #8  November 5,2009, 6:40pm
Bluemay2's Avatar

Quick Study

Joined: Aug 2009

Chicago

Posts: 90

See profile

A young singer (20ish). The ex-boyfriend is also a singer. The incident happened this past February one night before the Grammys. They were both scheduled to attend and/or perform but did not. Media blitz followed. Oprah even had something to say.Yes, I spend way too much time catching up on celebrity news...
 
  Reply With Quote
peg099 is offline peg099 Post #9  November 5,2009, 6:52pm
peg099's Avatar

Sage

Joined: Sep 2008

Canada

Posts: 12,516

See profile

I think many victims - especially those who have fallen for other abusive men in the past - feel that way. They know on some rational level that they don't want to repeat the pattern of falling for the same type of guy, but then find themselves in the same situation.

I'm not sure that her speaking out will have much effect. Many women in abusive relationships feel they have no option but to stay - often because their self-esteem is so low they feel they wouldn't be able to make it on their own. They wouldn't equate Rhianna's circumstances in terms of financial resources, support systemes etc. with their own. In some cases it might even be discouraging to them to know that even someone who is so accomplished, attractive, and wealthy could have trouble leaving an abusive man. It might make their own circumstances even more daunting. On the plus side, for some, it might help them feel less worthless to recognize that even celebrities are not immune. So it might lead to an increase in women reporting abuse - but I don't think that would translate into an increase in women actually leaving.
 
  Reply With Quote
Bluemay2 is offline Bluemay2 Post #10  November 5,2009, 6:57pm
Bluemay2's Avatar

Quick Study

Joined: Aug 2009

Chicago

Posts: 90

See profile

eHA_Admin_Lori;787949.
[I wrote :
Overall, do you think Rhianna's speaking out will have a much-needed impact on women currently living in a violent household? [/i]
No because women in such situations need to be psychologically and emotionally ready to leave. A celebrity cannot evoke this through a tv interview. Her speaking out may have an impact on her young fans (adolescents) by opening a dialogue for discussion with their parents/teachers/friends about dating and violence.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply
  • Page 1 of 2
  • 1
  • 2


« what am i doing wrong? | Relationships | I think I made a really big mistake, need advice »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
Would you date a feminist? CoteDuRhone Dating 410 July 14,2011 12:06pm
emotional challenges women leaving domestic violence niceguy2009 Relationships 9 August 21,2009 3:29pm
Domestic Violence Hairy Relationships 12 May 21,2009 11:10am

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“ ^This is the better plan.. My experience has been that love usually comes along when you least expect it, and when your heart is open enough to let it in. If you try to put a set time table on when ... ” –  TheThinker

Join the “Transition from dating to relationship” discussion

“ As Ingy mentions ...he's good with the lines and multitasking relationships.. All anyone can say is: don't get played again...especially by the same guy twice... Move on to someone who is decisive ... ” –  lynntlb78

Join the “Reuniting with EX” discussion

“This varies based on your age, gender, location, settings, and 29 dimensions. My settings are fairly narrow and I've always gotten a steady stream of matches. But, my location seems to have a lot ... ” –  dmi

Join the “Different Strategy” discussion

“I'm extremely allergic to cats, plus I just don't like 'em. So I won't date someone with cats. Dogs, I love. But I'm attracted to certain types of dogs. A guy with a little yorkie turns me off. ... ” –  ZisaGirl

Join the “What about a "PET BOX" ?? again this sounds simple or??” discussion

“If you get the opportunity, yes.” –  ThePriestess

Join the “Should I ever date in college?” discussion

“...and since you're Shaun Cassidy fan mitchell...this song is just for you! "Da Doo Ron Ron" I met her on a Monday And my heart stood still Da doo ron ron ron Da doo ron ron Somebody told me That ... ” –  legend29

Join the “Robin Gibbs Dead at 62...How Deep is Your Love?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 9:05am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0