Rhianna speaks out on domestic violence (interesting!)


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eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #1  November 5,2009, 1:01pm
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Video: Rihanna Breaks Her Silence! (Tears Up On When Speaking On Chris Brown Hitting Her)

I found this excerpt from the interview with Rhianna to be really interesting in particularly one respect:

-She blames herself for her situation, for "falling in love with that kind of person". I'd actually never heard a victim articulate that specifically -- I've heard them say they egged their abuser on, etc. (often convinced of that by the abuser), but never that they blamed themselves for falling in love.

Do you think many victims feel that way? If so is that part of why they stay in these abusive relationships far too long, often with deadly consequences?

Overall, do you think Rhianna's speaking out will have a much-needed impact on women currently living in a violent household?
Last edited by eHA_Admin_Lori; November 5,2009 at 3:00pm.
 
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eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #2  November 5,2009, 1:02pm
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Oops, forgot to add a link to an article about this as well:

Rihanna speaks: 'Love is so blind' - CNN.com
 
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Dugl is offline Dugl Post #3  November 5,2009, 3:13pm
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eHA_Admin_Lori wrote :
Overall, do you think Rhianna's speaking out will have a much-needed impact on women currently living in a violent household?
No....there are psychological issues involved that cannot be cured by a suggestion from a pop singer. If it were that easy....siblings, parents and friends of victims would be eligible for Sainthood.
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #4  November 5,2009, 3:31pm
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Any and every two-party dynamic involves two parties.

It appears to be settled data that some persons choose to date aggressive / assaultive persons repetitively, implying a preference for such persons.
 
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melman is offline melman Post #5  November 5,2009, 4:00pm
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I have absolutely no idea who this is.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #6  November 5,2009, 6:01pm
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Yeah...what's a Rhianna?
 
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D_Lion is offline D_Lion Post #7  November 5,2009, 6:05pm
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A celebrity, I think.
 
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Bluemay2 is offline Bluemay2 Post #8  November 5,2009, 7:40pm
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A young singer (20ish). The ex-boyfriend is also a singer. The incident happened this past February one night before the Grammys. They were both scheduled to attend and/or perform but did not. Media blitz followed. Oprah even had something to say.Yes, I spend way too much time catching up on celebrity news...
 
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peg099 is offline peg099 Post #9  November 5,2009, 7:52pm
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I think many victims - especially those who have fallen for other abusive men in the past - feel that way. They know on some rational level that they don't want to repeat the pattern of falling for the same type of guy, but then find themselves in the same situation.

I'm not sure that her speaking out will have much effect. Many women in abusive relationships feel they have no option but to stay - often because their self-esteem is so low they feel they wouldn't be able to make it on their own. They wouldn't equate Rhianna's circumstances in terms of financial resources, support systemes etc. with their own. In some cases it might even be discouraging to them to know that even someone who is so accomplished, attractive, and wealthy could have trouble leaving an abusive man. It might make their own circumstances even more daunting. On the plus side, for some, it might help them feel less worthless to recognize that even celebrities are not immune. So it might lead to an increase in women reporting abuse - but I don't think that would translate into an increase in women actually leaving.
 
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Bluemay2 is offline Bluemay2 Post #10  November 5,2009, 7:57pm
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eHA_Admin_Lori;787949.
[I wrote :
Overall, do you think Rhianna's speaking out will have a much-needed impact on women currently living in a violent household? [/i]
No because women in such situations need to be psychologically and emotionally ready to leave. A celebrity cannot evoke this through a tv interview. Her speaking out may have an impact on her young fans (adolescents) by opening a dialogue for discussion with their parents/teachers/friends about dating and violence.
 
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