CB89 is offline CB89 Post #11  October 18,2009, 9:37am
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Thanks for all the comments and tips, I will sincerely try to use them and try and change things slowly! Ill keep you guys posted!
 
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stevex is offline stevex Post #12  October 26,2009, 10:49am
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First off, this really caught my eye. You say you have been in a long distance relationship for five years. How did the two of you meet? Was there a period of time when you were physically together? How far apart are the two of you? How often have you physically been with her?

I ask -- because I am in a situation, as I have mentioned before, where I met a lady online when I was 17 years old, now we purposely had decided not to engage in a relationship and to be friends even though we spend hours on end on the phone and feel great passion for each-other. I am visiting her for the first time in December (booked my airfare, and reserved my room in NYC -- so this time it is actually happening).

Your case is also sort of the opposite of mine, she is majoring in genetics so as you can imagine she spends a lot of her time with school stuff. I have your usual day job and probably have a bit more free time than her. She is also an hour ahead of me in the time zone, so there are many times when she has to go when I am still wide awake. With that said, I do not get upset with her and encourage her to continue to do what she is doing. I don't want to see her do poorly in her studies because she dedicated too much time conversing with me.

While rather blunt, I think your girlfriend's behavior to you shows a bit of selfishness and immaturity; however, I am not saying she is either one of those things. Love, while it can bring the best out of people, can also bring the worst. I think that after 5 years if I am reading you correctly that you two haven't been physically together and yet have created such a strong bond it can be extremely difficult. When you say the relationship has been rocky for awhile, that is where I would see a red flag and wonder if it is right. I am not encouraging you to stop the relationship, but rather to think about the position that you are in and decide if she is the one for you. Is it all worth the heartache of the long distance relationship? If the two of you feel it is than the two of you will make it work.

Again, I would love to hear more about your situation, and I think that would also help us all give better guidance.
 
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