Five Ways Women Sabotage Their Relationships

I did not mean to offend either of you.

Maybe stated another way might provide a different perspective and it also might not!

I like to be needed or perhaps better stated, relied on at times. It gives me satisfaction to replace a light fixutre, replace an outlet, fix the toilet, make dinner, make plans, give you directions on the phone when you are in the car and lost, fix a flat tire, wash the cars, take the kids so that you can feel free to be out with the girls or just have you-time, give you a shoulder to cry on out of happiness or sadness, etc, et al.

The independent woman will fight each and every one of these - at least more often than not. This makes me feel as though I am not needed - so why have me around?

that's more about YOU and what you need than what she needs.

are women supposed to sit in the dark until you come over and change a light bulb just so you can feel needed? do you really want to date a woman who is so dependant on a man that she can't drive from point A to B without you?

I don't think you meant to offend anyone, but the way you stated it I found offensive. it's not a syndrome to be independent- It's life.




I doubt that highly. I'm independent and if my guy changes a light bulb for me or takes out the garbage I'm not going to argue. nor will he argue if i go over his house and do a chore or two. it's called being nice.

Playing hard to get is the single worst strategy a woman can employ. It's such a turn-off. You either like a guy or you don't, and should let him know as soon as possible. And that goes for how guys treat ladies, too.

My point is that a man would never be called independent with such a note of disdain.

dis⋅dain

–verb (used with object) 1.to look upon or treat with contempt; despise; scorn.2.to think unworthy of notice, response, etc.; consider beneath oneself: to disdain replying to an insult.
–noun 3.a feeling of contempt for anything regarded as unworthy; haughty contempt; scorn.


That is up to each person to decide, isn't it?

I answered how a woman sabotages a relationship. You took issue with the point about independence. I tried to clarify that independence is indeed an issue (it is to me) and that what I am looking for is an interdependent woman.

It is interesting to me that you look at it from the opposite perspective to prove a point. In looking through my original list, it seems that each could apply to either gender really... but that was not the topic. I wonder what made you take it there - and on this element alone?

As a point you might consider though:

What is behind men that are overly independent? Those men are usually scorned for being "absentee," and "inattentive," aren't they? I could argue there is an awful lot of disdain in that distinction, but I miss the purpose and interestingly feel more comfortable about the fact that stringent independence sabotages relationships...

It seems we might be on two completely different wavelengths. Thanks for your comments.

Not willing to rely on him (need him). The independent woman syndrome.

For me... I keep it reaaaallll simple. I'm looking for a genuinely and sincerely kind heart and somebody with an open/adventurous mind.

What I'm looking for is a man whom I agree with on a majority of important issues, but that fills in for me in areas where I'm not as skilled (emtionally, mentally and physically). In turn, I do the same for him.

So I don't think I'm looking so much for an equal relationship as much as I'm looking for a balanced one.

Okay, and he's got to be sexy, too. In his own way.