Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Relationships Relationships: they have their ups and their downs. Share your joy or weather the storm in this discussion board.

Reply
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
Fleuellen's Avatar

Enthusiast

Join Date: Jul 2009

Posts: 789

See profile

tweet37 wrote :
I thought it was illegal in the U.S. to have more than one spouse.
I think it only applies to lawful wife. I'm not aware of anywhere in the world where it is an issue to have more than one common law wife and family. I think in western parlance, it’s just referred to as the "other women."

But I kinda feel it is also bizarre that so many people launch into "micro-mirages." AKA as serial relationships; for a few weeks, months or years. But in such periods they behave the same as it married. Ie, expecting fidelity and accord in how each other behave. Would seem to be a recipe for disappointment.
- August 27th, 2009, 03:50 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#11   Reply With Quote
AsianFusion's Avatar

AsianFusion has gone fishing again!

Enthusiast

Join Date: Nov 2008

Posts: 937

See profile

tweet37 wrote :
Because the husband or wife got too fat?
Or . . . because they started wearing dentures?
- August 27th, 2009, 06:18 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#12   Reply With Quote
wordwoman's Avatar

wordwoman is in contemplation

Quick Study

Join Date: Mar 2009

Posts: 221

See profile

TrueStory wrote :
What I wonder about is WHY polygamy looked down upon and monogamy is praised as the way to be.

The next logical question jumps to mind: why is divorce rate so high in United States?
Monogamy is ingrained in American culture and law.

And, I've heard for years that the major reason given for divorce in the U.S. is financial matters. And, infidelity is way down on the list.
- August 27th, 2009, 06:46 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#13   Reply With Quote
CJF CJF is offline
CJF's Avatar

CJF is pondering life

Quick Study

Join Date: May 2009

Posts: 143

See profile

Polygamy is not popular for several reasons. Most women are not the submissive type and are usually naturally jealous and a bit possesive when it comes to the guy they love. They don't share their shoes with each other..why would they share a man?

Another reason to consider..what happens when they all conspire against you? If you think ticking off one woman is bad...think about ticking off 5 of them...

You might find yourself waking up one morning, stripped naked and duct taped to a tree.
- August 27th, 2009, 07:52 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#14   Reply With Quote
Jacquiem's Avatar

Jacquiem realizes that life deserves a full-throttle effort. Get out of her way!!!

Volunteer Community Leader

Join Date: Apr 2009

Posts: 502

See profile

My take on polygamy is it is not for me. If it works for you, great. Just don't knock me because I don't want that lifestyle for myself.

People divorce for a myriad of reasons, chief of which is financial problems. The seconds that are ties, IMO, are marrying the wrong person, marrying for the wrong reason, and marrying too young, and a growing casual attitude toward the seriousness and sanctity of marriage (I know that one's debatable - that's why it's an opinion).

Is breaking up in a polygamous relationship for any of those reasons any different, with the exception of there is no legal documentation to declare the dissolution of a union?
- August 27th, 2009, 07:55 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#15   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

hogrally's Avatar

hogrally Bought a boyfriend at a Bachelor Auction last night!!

Virtuoso

Join Date: Sep 2008

Posts: 4,561

See profile



Watch the show Big Love if you need your...Poly grip....
Sorry asian fusian...I had to add my 2 cents to your denture comment.
- August 27th, 2009, 09:42 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#16   Reply With Quote
tweet37's Avatar

tweet37 has all the tools and can........satisfy

Virtuoso

Join Date: Sep 2008

Posts: 3,690

See profile

TrueStory wrote :

The next logical question jumps to mind: why is divorce rate so high in United States?
tweet37 wrote :
Because the husband or wife got too fat?
AsianFusion wrote :
Or . . . because they started wearing dentures?
Jacquiem wrote :

People divorce for a myriad of reasons, chief of which is financial problems. The seconds that are ties, IMO, are marrying the wrong person, marrying for the wrong reason, and marrying too young, and a growing casual attitude toward the seriousness and sanctity of marriage
Or...somebody ate too much wedding cake.
- August 28th, 2009, 04:07 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#17   Reply With Quote
sabete2002's Avatar

sabete2002 Happy 2010!!

Veteran

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 2,339

See profile

What you are describing is polyamory. Polygamy/polyandry are marriages even if not recognised legally.

Not for me but I have no issue with those who are fine with the practice, whichever one it might be. Live and let live. I don't really understand why polygamy/polyandry are not legal. If consenting adults wish to be in a group marriage, why not? Polygamy has gotten a really bad press due to creeps like Warren Jeffs who forced young teens into marriage. That has less to do with polygamy and more to do with pedophilia. But yeah, if the adults involved are happy with the arrangement why not?
- August 28th, 2009, 07:28 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#18   Reply With Quote
graceventually's Avatar

graceventually was married Nov.28, and is no longer active on this site.

Virtuoso

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 3,058

See profile

...what is it about the threads on here lately that all remind me of a story....?

So at the risk of sounding like somebody's old granny again, this thread reminds me of a story. I was 20, and my family was traveling in Sweden. We got to this lovely hotel in Stockholm to find that a Saudi sheik, his four wives, and his fifteen children were checking in as well. I believe they'd booked one large wing of the top floor. I'm eyeing them with all the prejudices born of my recent encounters with a minor in Women's Studies....thinking about this repressive regime and hating this dictator, this autocrat, this power-hungry man who was running the lives of these women and children....

....but I was interrupted in the midst of this reverie by two of the children running up to one of the younger wives, chattering excitedly in Arabic, and pointing in the direction of lobby's gift shop. The young woman lookked questioningly at him and the sheik shook his head, waved his hand, and made a few evidently negative comments. That would be the end of it, I thought. But the childrens' mother looked from him to the oldest wife. She crisply addressed a couple of questions to the children, evidently received the answers she was looking for, and rose slowly to her feet, elegant in her black dress and headscarves, to go to the gift shop. The sheik continued to protest, a little more loudly over the voices of the children. But without so much as looking at him, the other 18 women and children rose at her signal and followed the oldest wife into the gift shop. In a few moments, they were all happily snapping up souvenirs. The sheik, still protesting (though a bit more feebly) slowly, heavily walked in, pulling an AMEX Gold Card out of his wallet....

Over the next 3 days, I saw the almost identical scene repeated at some of Stockholm's most favorite attractions....I saw them in a gift shop near the Wasa museum....at another near the royal palace....I saw him buy 19 ice creams in a city park....
....by the time I left Stockholm, my feminist ire had simmered down and I felt simply sorry for the poor sheik. Power?! He appeared to have none!
His oldest wife, on the other hand.....

Last edited by graceventually; August 28th, 2009 at 09:15 am.
- August 28th, 2009, 09:07 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#19   Reply With Quote
hummingbird2009's Avatar

Quick Study

Join Date: Aug 2009

Posts: 91

See profile

To the OP... what hole did you crawl out of? Either you have a insecurity problem within yourself or a s e x addiction.
- August 29th, 2009, 12:11 am
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#20   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply

Bookmarks


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“As a follow up to BEA's post this topic is NOT about each others posting style. If you feel that someone/anyone is being attacked please click the report button. If someone pushes your buttons then ... ” – yoga_gal

Join the “Getting Over My Girlfriend's Past Lovers?” discussion

“"wife material" but not necessarily "girlfriend material" ... It sounds like a compliment to me!! But a veiled insult? Hmmm? Because you've got to be a gf before you can be a wife, right?? ... ” – hankscorpio

Join the “That WAS a compliment... I think?!” discussion

“It is really difficult to get over him. I did delete his phone number from my cell phone so I won't continue to text him, but I think it may take a while before I can really move on. I still think ... ” – scaredhimaway

Join the “Did I scare him away?” discussion

“I can't find good links for reporting bugs in eHarmony. Also, there used to be a link to report a problem with someone's profile. I have what appears to be a match with a broken profile and I can't ... ” – ami1uwant

Join the “Reporting Problems” discussion

“I dont think it works that way obviously. ” – Nanette

Join the “Who Makes The 1st Move” discussion

“lol....the psychologists are referring to a real life face to face meeting. Some research says that it's even shorter than 30 seconds and more like the blink of an eye. I do think there is some ... ” – DancingFool

Join the “Ladies, do you decide in the first 30 seconds if you're interetsed? And, what are you looking for in a first impression?” discussion

“You don't. That would be rude and cruel. You thank them for the lovely/interesting/whatever conversations that you've had the past couple of weeks, but you're focusing on another match. Then wish ... ” – nunayabizness

Join the “New pics and not attracted” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 03:20 pm.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2010, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0