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shrek99352 shrek99352 is offline
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I need some help understanding something here.

As those of you know, I have been through a lot with my now ex-girlfriend, and as I stand back and watch history repeat it's self; I just can't help but ask one simple question...

Why?

She has some incredibly good relationships in the past, and she has chosen to walk away from them for different reasons. I would like to say that between her ex-husband and myself that we both where very good to her, and she flew the nest.

I guess I don't know why it is that people who are in a very loving relationship, that they know there in a secure relationship, and that we're not going to walk out on them.

Any ideas to help me understand? Any ideas on how I can approach this kind of thing with someone in the future?

FYI, I have got away from her because of this behavior, I got very tired of the abuse...
- August 19th, 2009, 11:02 pm
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Babily Babily is offline
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Maybe you are being too nice. Women like nice guys, but when you are too nice, it might be a turn off.
- August 20th, 2009, 12:34 am
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Wiseman2 Wiseman2 is offline
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Interesting statement, explains your philosophy in this other thread :
http://advice.eharmony.com/boards/da...tml#post715733 (Am I too judgmental?)

Mr. no ride home and Mr. maple syrup guy don't sound like your type .Corny attempts at suggestive flirting, well.... trying to see if you are game, what the heck . Also, Mr. no-ride, took a stab at it? Why don't YOU elevate the field.... by being more selective and planning better dates , rather than setting yourself up with the last minute, try to get lucky, booty call types...... tweet37 wrote :
Where do you find these weirdos?


Babily wrote :
Maybe you are being too nice. Women like nice guys, but
Babily wrote :
when you are too nice, it might be a turn off.
- August 20th, 2009, 07:34 am
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boccabum boccabum is offline
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shrek99352 wrote :
I need some help understanding something here.

As those of you know, I have been through a lot with my now ex-girlfriend, and as I stand back and watch history repeat it's self; I just can't help but ask one simple question...

Why?

She has some incredibly good relationships in the past, and she has chosen to walk away from them for different reasons. I would like to say that between her ex-husband and myself that we both where very good to her, and she flew the nest.

I guess I don't know why it is that people who are in a very loving relationship, that they know there in a secure relationship, and that we're not going to walk out on them.

Any ideas to help me understand? Any ideas on how I can approach this kind of thing with someone in the future?

FYI, I have got away from her because of this behavior, I got very tired of the abuse...
Many women, including your ex g/f, aren't really interested or driven by a secure, loving relationship. That's what they want, sure...but with someone who she feels excites her. Maybe she's defective. Or maybe the fantasy she had of you and her when you first met faded as reality struck and you two became normal to each other.
When a womans (some-not all) emotional attraction to a man fades, no amount of love or security will keep her. The next exciting and mysterious guy that comes along will pull her away.
Not that you did anything wrong, but can you think of ways that you stopped being exciting to her? I agree that someone in a LTR shouldn't have to juggle and entertain their partner forever, but the reality is that if you want to keep a woman like this, you have to realize they get bored very easily.
- August 20th, 2009, 08:43 am
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DancingFool DancingFool is offline
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It's normal to question yourself after you've gotten out of a relationship, but sometimes you have to realize that maybe it is not you. Rather you and her were simply not compatible for various reasons and the important part is to find a woman who is compatible with who you are rather trying to become someone you are not.
- August 20th, 2009, 11:54 am
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