Unsucessful Relationships/ or too much rejection could be dangerous.


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passat1 is offline passat1 Post #1  August 5,2009, 9:21am
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Details Emerge on Pennsylvania Shooter
By GENARO C. ARMAS,
AP
posted: 5 MINUTES AGO
comments: 885
filed under: Crime News, National News
BRIDGEVILLE, Pa. (Aug. 5) - A man who sprayed bullets into a fitness class filled with women, killing three and then himself, apparently kept a Web page in which he wrote about years of rejection by women and an earlier plan for violence at the gym in which he said he "chickened out."
Neighbors described 48-year-old George Sodini as anti-social, and the Web page in his name showcased a resume setting forth his credentials as an unhappy loner. It listed his date of death — Aug. 4, 2009 — and his status of "Never married."
"I need to remain focused and absorbed COMPLETELY. Last time I tried this, in January, I chickened out," one page on the site said. It ended with the words "Death Lives!"
He also complained of not having a girlfriend since 1984, not having a date since May 2008 and not having sex for 19 years. "Women just don't like me. There are 30 million desirable women in the US (my estimate) and I cannot find one," he wrote.
On Tuesday night, the gunman walked into the fitness center, entered a "Latin impact" dance aerobics class and placed a duffel bag on the ground. He rooted around in the bag for a moment, turned off the lights, took out at least two guns and started shooting.
Three women were killed and nine people were injured. Police say he may have fired as many as 52 shots before turning the gun on himself and committing suicide.
 
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eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #2  August 5,2009, 11:34am
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I actually posted about that here:
http://advice.eharmony.com/boards/of...you-think.html

In my post I said:

"We all get rejected and feel lonely sometimes....but what takes those feelings and escalates them to violent acts? Was the shooter simply "crazy" or is there more to it than that?

What do you think?"

Would love to hear your thoughts!
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #3  August 5,2009, 11:58am
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I think he was probably always a weirdo, and that's why he couldn't get a date, because he creeped out the women.

I mean, come on, he didn't have sex for 19 years? And blaming women for that? Normal men would do what they have to do, or go to a prostitute.

30+ years ago there was a man at work who shot the janitor in the bathroom. Everybody knew that guy was weird, we just didn't know how much. But pretty much everybody steered clear of him. When they searched his desk afterwards, it was full of Son of Sam articles!
 
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DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #4  August 5,2009, 12:08pm
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Perhaps the whole reason that women would stay away from him is precisely because he was crazy. It's really the chicken and the egg question.
 
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Nanette is offline Nanette Post #5  August 5,2009, 12:15pm
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if anyone has ever read Mary Shelleys Frankenstein in essence the same question is posed. was the monster evil or did "society" and people make him that way (i actually wrote an essay on this. its one of my favorite books lol)


 
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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #6  August 5,2009, 12:20pm
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Agree with this. A psychotic loner usually doesn't get many dates........ There are some psychotic states and personality disorders in which the desire for sex and / or a woman ( usually as a possession) is present, but the ability to form bonds, and have social, no less relationship skills, is lacking....
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DancingFool wrote :
Perhaps the whole reason that women would stay away from him is precisely because he was crazy. It's really the chicken and the egg question.
 
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eHA_Admin_Lori is offline eHA_Admin_Lori — Advice Official Moderator Post #7  August 5,2009, 12:30pm
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Wiseman2 wrote :
Agree with this. A psychotic loner usually doesn't get many dates........ There are some psychotic states and personality disorders in which the desire for sex and / or a woman ( usually as a possession) is present, but the ability to form bonds, and have social, no less relationship skills, is lacking....
.
Good point. One of the news sites posted a photo of this guy and I have to say -- I thought he was a good looking guy. Surely he would have been flirted with and such, out in the world -- but if you don't know how to react, what to DO with that type of attention, then you would clearly be nothing but frustrated by it all.
 
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel Post #8  August 5,2009, 12:36pm
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would very much appreciate it if the rain would stop, now! Thanks!

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Nanette wrote :
if anyone has ever read Mary Shelleys Frankenstein in essence the same question is posed. was the monster evil or did "society" and people make him that way (i actually wrote an essay on this. its one of my favorite books lol)

I ask that very same question when my students study this novel...lol
 
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel Post #9  August 5,2009, 12:42pm
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eH_Advice_Admin_Lori wrote :
Good point. One of the news sites posted a photo of this guy and I have to say -- I thought he was a good looking guy. Surely he would have been flirted with and such, out in the world -- but if you don't know how to react, what to DO with that type of attention, then you would clearly be nothing but frustrated by it all.
Very good point. I can't even imagine what kind of a mental state of mind this man must have been in, not that it justifies what he did in any way. My heart goes out to the people whose only "fault" was being in the wrong place at the wrong time.
 
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yeoww is offline yeoww Post #10  August 5,2009, 1:01pm
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eH_Advice_Admin_Lori wrote :
Good point. One of the news sites posted a photo of this guy and I have to say -- I thought he was a good looking guy. Surely he would have been flirted with and such, out in the world -- but if you don't know how to react, what to DO with that type of attention, then you would clearly be nothing but frustrated by it all.
To continue with your comment, Lori, when someone is "off" you can sense it. Suddenly good looks don't matter anymore, the red flags go up and you back away. Granted some people have had unimaginably horrible lives, but most human beings don't turn to mass murder to relieve tension. So I don't think it's the unsuccessful relationships or amount of rejection that's at issue, but how some individuals are "wired."

I recently watched an absolutely chilling movie called "Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer" that kept me awake for several nights after. Without my trying to describe the undescribable (is that a word?) it's worth watching if you want a glimpse into the psyche of a serial killer.
 
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