outdoorjeanie is offline outdoorjeanie Post #1  July 27,2009, 8:06pm
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I'm just wondering what criteria people use to decide whether they are ready to go on a vacation with someone they are involved with? I'm sure there will be a range of opinions, but do you feel that you must be in a committed relationship to do this, and do you think that by going on a vacation with someone you've been dating indicates that the relationship is moving to the next level of commitment, i.e. marriage???
 
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singinggirl is online now singinggirl Post #2  July 27,2009, 8:40pm
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Jeanie, I don't know if this counts or not, but my bf and I went on a short vacation this past weekend. We've been dating about 18 months and this was the first time we went on vacation. The reason I'm not sure it counts is that we took my kids (7 & 13) and had separate rooms. (We both feel that it's very important that my kids, especially my 13 yr old daughter, not see us in a situation that we tell her is inappropriate.)

So this is different in that we didn't share a room, but maybe even a bigger deal for us because of taking the kids with us. I do think that I need to be in a committed relationship to get to the point where we could do this. I don't know about the getting married thing...
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #3  July 27,2009, 9:16pm
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outdoorjeanie wrote :
I'm just wondering what criteria people use to decide whether they are ready to go on a vacation with someone they are involved with? I'm sure there will be a range of opinions, but do you feel that you must be in a committed relationship to do this, and do you think that by going on a vacation with someone you've been dating indicates that the relationship is moving to the next level of commitment, i.e. marriage???



I've never gone on a vacation where I haven't been married. I have done a few short trips, like your other post, except without the kids. I don't think it means the relationship is moving to the next level of commitment.

My criteria for traveling with somebody is: Do they want to travel the same way I do? Some people like to go first class all the way and drop a wad. Others want to go on $100 a day or less.
 
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Harvey7 is offline Harvey7 Post #4  July 27,2009, 11:51pm

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Most people plan a vacation in advance and make reservations, camping, fishing, hotel and airlines, trains or by car. A vacation in no longer cheap so you save or put it on a charge card and pay it off.
My ideal vacation is a first class Golf and Tennis Resort and ad in some fishing and of course Room Service and breakfast on the terrace, lunch in the club house and dinner at a good restaurant.

Now the next item is who do I want to invite to share the vacation with me? Is she a golfer or will she sleep and lie by the pool, while I play golf? Will she go on a shopping spree and charge it to me or will she be playing golf with me and a 2nd. couple?

Note known of my options include marriage!

It's really about sharing mutual interests and having a good time together! If your going to be a millstone around someones neck, don't accept the invitation.

Harvey7.
Last edited by Harvey7; July 27,2009 at 11:54pm.
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #5  July 28,2009, 1:34am
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Here is my strictly subjective answer to your question –
I would have *no second thoughts* about the subject at all.

I like my personal space and I love to travel, but I don’t like traveling alone and never do. I prefer to travel with a friend, just so we can share the experience and make it more memorable for both involved. Not to mention the added benefit of getting to know each other much better by observing each other and communicating with each other outside of the comfort zone of familiar surroundings!

All joking aside, I've honestly learnt a lot from traveling with my friends - some friendships are no longer as close as a result, while others are infinitely closer, and grow even stronger with every passing day, long after our return date. So, I strongly favor this kind of "interpersonal compatibility testing".

There is another purely, objectively selfish reason for this – I have no sense of direction whatsoever . And walking around with a map all the time is lame – it means concentrating on directions instead of the true value of the experience, based on ALL the senses combined. Therefore I need a friend who instinctively knows whether to turn left or right, rather than consult the map, or the nearest street directory, at every intersection.

Provided that my personal criteria for a partner is very firm in stating that he simply HAS TO BE my True Friend first, I see no conflict of interest whatsoever. In fact, it is a perfect match of Friendship and Adventure, and hopefully more, depending on the level of Involvement on both sides .

Plus, it always helps to have the Right Man with me to enhance the senses .

The rest are just objective details, easy to negotiate, work out and compromise on, if even necessary to compromise at all.

Hope this helps in some way...
Last edited by IcecreamMoon; July 28,2009 at 1:40am. Reason: Marriage would not be part of my travel planning, but a perfect #5 of this post is the highest grade, if you know what I mean
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #6  July 28,2009, 6:52am
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[quote=IcecreamMoon;689260]
All joking aside, I've honestly learnt a lot from traveling with my friends - some friendships are no longer as close as a result, while others are infinitely closer, and grow even stronger with every passing day, long after our return date. So, I strongly favor this kind of "interpersonal compatibility testing".




Absolutely. One of the worst vacations I had was when we took another couple along to Hawaii. Even though we already had the accomodations and car, the four of us could barely agree on dinner, because the other husband was cheap, cheap, cheap!

Thank God they were only there one week! It was a relief to go on to another island and another week without them... Travel is important to me (as the avatar suggests), and my strongest criteria is: How do they want to go?
 
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TiffanyDiamond is offline TiffanyDiamond Post #7  July 28,2009, 7:21am
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outdoorjeanie wrote :
I'm just wondering what criteria people use to decide whether they are ready to go on a vacation with someone they are involved with? I'm sure there will be a range of opinions, but do you feel that you must be in a committed relationship to do this, and do you think that by going on a vacation with someone you've been dating indicates that the relationship is moving to the next level of commitment, i.e. marriage???
I don't think you have to be at the point where you are talking about marriage just to go on a vaation together. If I enjoyed the persons company and we are already at the point where we are intimate in our relationship I would consider that appropriate. If I enjoyed his company and we are not intimate yet I would go but get separate rooms.
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #8  July 28,2009, 7:30am
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j0hn8andy wrote :
Travel is important to me (as the avatar suggests), and my strongest criteria is: How do they want to go?
I don't really know how they want to go yet. I don't even know how I want to go for that matter .

All I do know is that I'm not a big fan of backpacking or camping - I like my creature comforts way to much for that

But as long as my travel companion does not get turned off me for getting along with his mother , we should be just fine, I think...

Or am I mixing up threads here?
Well, before I go a step further and commit the ultimate crime of threadjacking, or even worse... I'd better get some sleep and do some travel related dreaming.

Have a fun filled day, please, but don't travel too far without me!
 
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Gr8Guyn2008 is online now Gr8Guyn2008 Post #9  July 28,2009, 8:13am
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j0hn8andy wrote :
I've never gone on a vacation where I haven't been married. I have done a few short trips, like your other post, except without the kids. I don't think it means the relationship is moving to the next level of commitment.

My criteria for traveling with somebody is: Do they want to travel the same way I do? Some people like to go first class all the way and drop a wad. Others want to go on $100 a day or less.
$100 per day I thought that was first class
 
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Dafearon is offline Dafearon Post #10  July 28,2009, 8:34am
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Gr8Guyn2008 wrote :
$100 per day I thought that was first class
Hey, some cheap econolodges in some places cost more than a hundred bucks a day. Virginia Beach's Econolodge wanted 250!!!! But thats on the shore.
 
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