Any past or present jealous guys?


Reply
  • Page 1 of 3
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
 
Topic Tools Search this Thread
sthngrlc is offline sthngrlc Post #1  July 24,2009, 4:53am
sthngrlc's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Jul 2009

Los Angeles

Posts: 31

See profile

I want thoughts on this issue, especially guys who may have a tendency to be jealous. I started to date a guy (semi-long distance) and within a month he told me that before he could be serious with me, he would need me to not hangout with guys. He told me I could choose to, but if so he couldn't be in a serious dating/relationship with me. I agreed, thinking he was worth it. After 6 months and he acting odd and talking about breaking up, I finally went out with 2 girlfriends to a small party. I lied to him knowing he would get very mad and probably break up with me for that alone. I wanted him to breakup with me for a concrete reason and not because I hungout with people. I guess my question is why do guys act like this? I know lying is wrong, but come on are all guys like this? And yes, he broke up because I ended up confessing after I lied to him for a night.
 
  Reply With Quote
BikerBeagle is offline BikerBeagle Post #2  July 24,2009, 11:43am
BikerBeagle's Avatar

thinks everyone should just ask themselves, WWBBD?

Virtuoso

Joined: Aug 2008

Kansas

Posts: 2,548

See profile

Yes ...all guys are psychotic-nutjob-control-freaks who won't want to be in a relationship with you unless you promise to stop hanging around with other people.

Sheez. Count yourself lucky you got away from this loser and the next guy who makes such a demand of you, you'll know it's never worth it.
 
  Reply With Quote
becomingsabrina is offline becomingsabrina Post #3  July 24,2009, 12:20pm
becomingsabri…'s Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Jul 2008

georgia

Posts: 16

See profile

Some women can be like this also. I've never been a "jealous" person per say but I did meet ONE man in my life that brought that side of me out. I felt as though I wanted him all the time, all to myself. The thought of him wanting someone else tormented me. I felt like I had turned into a different person. Needless to say that relationship didnt last long . Now that I'm years over it and can think about it with a sense of humor, I would love to figure out what it was about that particular man that brought that out in me.

anyone else? or is it just me? maybe he was the only man I ever really FULLY wanted with a passion
 
  Reply With Quote
CJF is offline CJF Post #4  July 24,2009, 12:33pm
CJF's Avatar

is pondering life

Quick Study

Joined: May 2009

NE Georgia

Posts: 143

See profile

The guy was already making demands on you before you even entered into a relationship. Be glad it's over.

All guys are not like this. Some don't even care what we do ;-)

(of course those that don't care expect the same freedom).
 
  Reply With Quote
DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #5  July 24,2009, 1:09pm
DancingFool's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Jan 2009

Posts: 5,209

See profile

Sorry but this guy sounds like a complete psycho and a control freak. Thankfully most people at large are not like that. Hope you now know that this type of a person is never really worth it - they have way too many mental problems to be capable of a healthy relationship.
 
  Reply With Quote
DancingFool is offline DancingFool Post #6  July 24,2009, 1:11pm
DancingFool's Avatar

Power Poster

Joined: Jan 2009

Posts: 5,209

See profile

becomingsabrina wrote :
Some women can be like this also. I've never been a "jealous" person per say but I did meet ONE man in my life that brought that side of me out. I felt as though I wanted him all the time, all to myself. The thought of him wanting someone else tormented me. I felt like I had turned into a different person. Needless to say that relationship didnt last long . Now that I'm years over it and can think about it with a sense of humor, I would love to figure out what it was about that particular man that brought that out in me.

anyone else? or is it just me? maybe he was the only man I ever really FULLY wanted with a passion
Something about his actions made you feel insecure - you did not feel like you are THE woman in his life and THE person who matters to him.
 
  Reply With Quote
Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #7  July 24,2009, 1:56pm
Wiseman2's Avatar

Virtuoso

Joined: May 2009

Posts: 4,573

See profile

Very good posts, yes BikerBeagle, this guy does sound like a controlling pyscho. And as far as becomingsabrina's post, very poignant, if it was that situational, your instincts may have been right that he could, would not really be yours, in other words, he could have been a ladies man who had the ladies around all the time and kept you wondering. These two posts are interesting ends of the spectrum of " he too into me...and insanely jealous" and "he's into to everyone, me too?" Interesting, both of these types who are jealous or try to make you jealous are insecure and usually need a gagle of women around, hence the paranoia with Mr. Possesive, and uneasiness with Mr. Playboy.
becomingsabrina wrote :
Some women can be like this also. I've never been a "jealous" person per say but I did meet ONE man in my life that brought that side of me out. I felt as though I wanted him all the time, all to myself. The thought of him wanting someone else tormented me. I felt like I had turned into a different person. Needless to say that relationship didnt last long . Now that I'm years over it and can think about it with a sense of humor, I would love to figure out what it was about that particular man that brought that out in me.
anyone else? or is it just me? maybe he was the only man I ever really FULLY wanted with a passion
BikerBeagle wrote :
Yes ...all guys are psychotic-nutjob-control-freaks who won't want to be in a relationship with you unless you promise to stop hanging around with other people.
Sheez. Count yourself lucky you got away from this loser and the next guy who makes such a demand of you, you'll know it's never worth it.
 
  Reply With Quote
sthngrlc is offline sthngrlc Post #8  July 24,2009, 2:06pm
sthngrlc's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Jul 2009

Los Angeles

Posts: 31

See profile

Thanks for the insights. I agree that it's a good thing it is over. The thing that seems funny is that he was so jealous yet he broke-up with me and therefore no longer had say over what I did. I'm not a bad person, but I just couldn't take it any longer...I missed my friends. Couldn't even hangout with my best girl friend and her boyfriend of several years unless he was there.
 
  Reply With Quote
KungFuFtr is offline KungFuFtr Post #9  July 24,2009, 2:23pm
KungFuFtr's Avatar

I just saved a bundle on child support by switching to condoms!

Veteran

Joined: Dec 2008

San Antonio Texas

Posts: 1,025

See profile

One of my first girlfriends (17ish) was a very jealous girl. She on the other hand was a massive flirt and tease with other guys. She thrived on attention and was disappointed that I wouldn't yell at her and put her in her place. I lost interest very fast.
 
  Reply With Quote
olneyjeeps is online now olneyjeeps Post #10  July 24,2009, 7:12pm
olneyjeeps's Avatar

...

Veteran

Joined: May 2009

no

Posts: 1,794

See profile

In my humble opinion / observations, jealousy is a clear sign of insecurity. The jealous person is afraid that their partner will find someone who makes them happier and therefore will replace them.
Two schools of avoiding being replaced:
1: By implementing jealous requirements /limitations/threats shielding from possibility from meeting someone
2: making yourself irreplaceable (incidentally, the school I ascribe to)
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply
  • Page 1 of 3
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3


« Its horrible i know... but need advice please | Relationships | Should I ask for him back? »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Topics
Topic Topic Starter Board Replies Last Post
Question for guys 20-35ish Red28 About You 57 August 16,2011 12:24pm
Ladies -- will you date younger guys? stevex Dating 132 October 28,2009 8:12pm
advice from eHarmony past or present subscribers pussinboots Relationships 12 September 13,2009 5:53pm
Am I being jealous or is she unreasonable? chubbard Ask a Dating Expert 44 June 9,2009 9:55am
How to let go of past loves landstar59 Beautiful minds 1 May 30,2009 3:37pm

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“It's important to understand the way a site works. Rigidly assuming / insisting that eH works likes all the others you're used to isn't utilizing the site functions to your best advantage. No.... ... ” –  Wiseman2

Join the “First contact on eHarmony, smile, questions, email?” discussion

“ If you have yet to meet, you don't know him or whether you two will form a connection. Connections formed over e-mail tend to be fantasies. You will see this echoed over and over by experienced ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “How do i recoonect with him again?” discussion

“ Then it's a bit premature to worry about being friend-zoned. The first step is to go out on dates! What specific steps did you try? How many women did you ask out in person? Did you buy a ... ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “For women to answer: How to avoid the friend zone” discussion

“ This is an old thread. She asked this in 2010. By now they are likely very exclusive or very over. ” –  shapeShifter79

Join the “is there a reason to ask if we're exclusive?” discussion

“ I'm sure he wouldn't get that. And I can't be sure that was the actual message. But it sems kind of likely to me.” –  boomer_gal

Join the “Why am I not successful?” discussion

“Hi eccemuliere and welcome to eHA.On an internet forum like eHA, you're going to get a wide variety of responses; some you'll like and some you won't. It's best to focus on the ones that speak to ... ” –  Sassafras54

Join the “Being blown off, or something else?” discussion

“ Although I have ignored my gut at times, in hindsight it's always been right, in terms of recognizing bad choices. QUOTE] But once we realize our past mistakes, we can use our reason to clue us ... ” –  eccemuliere

Join the “Is Your Gut Leading - or Misleading You?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 1:20pm.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0