Please help decipher this?


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Wiseman2 is online now Wiseman2 Post #1  July 9,2009, 2:24pm
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I got this email.. from a friend of mine.... What does it really mean???
I've been thinking about us getting together tomorrow and I decided that I can't do it. I want very much to see you, but If we were to see each other I would constantly be feeling that there could be much more to our friendship had we met at a different time and place, and I really don't believe that I could spend time with you without wanting to get closer to you - which would ultimately only hurt you. I hope you understand what I'm trying to say. I don't want to lose your friendship
 
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D_Lion is online now D_Lion Post #2  July 9,2009, 2:40pm
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She wants you to carry her into the bedroom ...

... but will inevitably disappear on you at some point "to sort out her feelings" or something.
 
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txbubba is offline txbubba Post #3  July 9,2009, 2:40pm

is not out of his mind - just out of bullets

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it means that he or she found someone better then you
 
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brneyedangel is offline brneyedangel Post #4  July 9,2009, 5:08pm
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would very much appreciate it if the rain would stop, now! Thanks!

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She isn't available for anything more than friendship, even though she would like more than that.
 
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Monica1 is offline Monica1 Post #5  July 9,2009, 5:18pm

:o)

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Wellllll.........how long have you known her and do you have any idea why she thinks she could hurt you? Married?
 
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j0hn8andy is offline j0hn8andy Post #6  July 9,2009, 5:23pm
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It's a DEAR JOHN letter.

Better luck next time.
 
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tweet37 is offline tweet37 Post #7  July 9,2009, 6:15pm
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has all the tools and can........satisfy

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She thinks a FWB thing will hurt you.
 
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AustinShaguar is offline AustinShaguar Post #8  July 9,2009, 6:18pm
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She likes you a lot but realizes that either you have baggage that she doesn't think she can handle long term or she has baggage and doesn't think you can put up with it long term. Any chance for a long term relationship is therefore doomed and she's afraid she'll lose you as a friend if you two tried to make it work.

So, do you come with baggage?
 
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EMTZ is offline EMTZ Post #9  July 9,2009, 6:23pm
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has quickly adapted back to her lazy lifestyle

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Wait... Aren't you a wise man?
Last edited by EMTZ; July 9,2009 at 6:23pm. Reason: Just realized the 2 at the end :)
 
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IcecreamMoon is offline IcecreamMoon Post #10  July 9,2009, 10:30pm
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Nothing to see here at all...

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D_Lion wrote :
She wants you to carry her into the bedroom ...
What if she doesn't like heights and gets all dizzy, flustered and hyperventilating before they even get there?

Wiseman,
I'm actually not all that pessimistic about your situation. I think this woman cares about you, and your friendship means a lot to her. She just needs to sort to some of her own feelings and emotions, and maybe deal with some of her past frustrations and disappointments first, before she can even consider changing the nature of her relationship with you.

And I can only see it as a positive sign, not the dreaded "friend zone". But then I don't get why that zone is considered bad either... A relationship without true friendship at the base has little chance of long term survival. It usually turns into a one night stand or friends with benefits, at best. And I have a feeling your lady is thinking along the same lines, and probably does not want to ruin long term possibilities with you by rushing into something she is not ready for at this stage.

One thing that is clear is that she is not ready for a committed relationship right now. I don't know what you should do though, that's for you to decide, depending on the strength of your feelings for her and where you are in life generally at this point in time.

You can either wait or move on, and explain to her why. But I would strongly recommend to stay friends with this woman, and keep the lines of communication open. If nothing else, she sounds like a caring friend indeed.

Then again, others may be right and she may not be interested. This is not the feeling I get from her email, and if she wanted FWB, she'd probably jump at the chance to see you tomorrow... but I'm not a mind reader and my be wrong, of course.

All I know is that kind and honest talking never hurt anyone much.

Good luck!
Last edited by IcecreamMoon; July 9,2009 at 10:51pm. Reason: Just had to add the sentence at the top, just after hearing the pot talking to the kettle in the kitchen...
 
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