Why start the lie to begin with?

OK, I just met another match in person, after several weeks of Open Communication. Turns out this guy was imbellishing the truth to the point of lie. This has happened several times and each time, they think i should just excuse the lies. Things like being 6 years older than stated, divorced a much shorter period of time then initially stated, they have children living at home full time when this is something that profile says you don't want, some stuff that matters when trying to have a relationship with someone.


So, I'm just wondering, why are the men/women telling the lies if what they want is a relationship? The minute I find out the person has lied on important topics, I'm no longer interested in them (for that reason alone).So, it's really counter-defeating. Why are people going to such lengths just to be rejected in the end?

Well, I don't know why women lie, although (being a guy) I'm aware how it has become more the norm than the exception.


But why men lie on profiles is fairly simple. Men lie because of an age old lie still practiced by women.


What is this fabled lie? It's that women don't care about superficialities such as height, income, status, power, full head of hair, etc. Women have been spinning the yarn forever how they can see past superficialities and love the man from the inside out.


Furthermore, being a fairly self-conscious gender, women also chastized those who might place such importance on superficialities they, themselves, might not be able to satisfy (thin, beautiful, youthful, did I mention thin?)


So in essence, women painted themselves into a corner. They couldnt dare admit that they, too, valued superficial male attrbutes, lest they allow men to value them openly as well (thereby disqualifying themselves).


Men, being so devoutly observant of women, took this rule at face value. That is where, "Surely once she gets to know me, she'll love what's on the inside" was born. Men think once you get past their lack of height, thin wallet, shiny head, and parental roomates you'll want to be with them.


Can women really blame them? They certainly haven't taught men any differently. The moment a guy pretends to voice any kind of physical preference the opposite gender cuffs him and sends him away to the (insert female shortcoming here) appreciation re-education center.


So, in summary, if you want men to stop lying on their profiles, all you really have to do is come clean yourself and openly defend (socially appropriate) preferences, even if it means disqualifying yourself.


Let the healing (or flaming) begin!