Still hurting over cruel breakup


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Dafearon is offline Dafearon Post #11  February 5,2009, 1:31pm
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I know your pain. I too lost the love of my life because it came down to a choice between her children and me.


I'll tell you this. You may never get over the pain. it still haunts me to this day 4 1/2 years later. The thing for me is that I KNOW she's not happy with her decision. I KNOW if things were different that she would want to get back to me. I KNOW things would be better with me than where she is now. BUT, she doesn't know this. She will never know because she won't let herself see. I still talk to her to this day. Just quick IMs here and there. I can still sense her pain. She's not the same person she was. She's much sadder.


But bottom line, it was her choice. I did wait for her for some time, but its not fair for me to put my life on hold when she will never figure out hers. It took me 2 years before i could date again. How i dealt with it was that I had to put those feelings into perspective. Deal with them, and move on. This doesn't happen overnight. Give yourself time to heal.
 
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thehorseracingman57 is offline thehorseracingman57 Post #12  February 5,2009, 6:08pm
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tell me about ti,,,,,almost the same thing happend to me at christmas,,,,,,,,,,would someone PLEASE tell me why women DONT want a very good and most of all a HONEST man,,,,there are so so many games going on that well,,,,,,,im lost I look at my friends all seem to keep there lives going on since my marriage ended over 10 years ago why cant i find true love or better still ,,,,,,is ther one good god loving woman who really want a good man,,,well,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,im here waiting,,,
 
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kath72 is offline kath72 Post #13  February 6,2009, 12:20am
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mkeys81,472584 wrote :

kath72,472071 wrote :


mkeys81,470647 wrote :


just take things an hour at a time, a day at a time and it will get better.


mkeys - how long did it take you to really recover from what happened to you? (saw your post about your bad break up) what really helped you to pick your life up again?


You read my orginal post on these boards about my own break up? kudos, that was a long read... what helped me was finally realizing and truly coming to terms with everything i suggested in this thread. it didnt matter how i felt for her or what i was willing to go through, the only thing that mattered was how she didnt feel for me and that point was made very clear.


the other thing was the amount of negativity i went through in so many different ways that once things started to become clear and i was able to put things into perspective and come to terms - all the little things that happened, all the big things that happened helped to nail the coffin shuti guess you could say.


i also had the help of getting some really quality advice on these boards and sometimes when i would be feeling awful i would come back to the threads and re-read everything i wrote and everything that was writen to me. that would help me remember somethings and again, help me to put everything into perspective.


when people scre w us over its never easy, the best and really the only thing we can do is learn from it and continue the daily grind that life is sooo freakin generous to grant us.
I read your post on "out of the blue" thread - and no post is too long to read when your trying to make sense of what happened to you. You give great honest advice and its been helpful to me - thank you...hope its helping taosguy too. Big hug to you taosguy...hope you've found some help in these messages xoxoxoxo
 
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taosguy74 is offline taosguy74 Post #14  February 7,2009, 6:07am
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Thanks to everyone who responded. I have a wonderful support group friends, family. therapists and I joined a new church. I'm hanging out with new and differnent people and like "Dafearon" stated. I KNOW that she just gave up the best thing that was and could have been in life. Her loss not mine anymore. LOVE TO ALL
 
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