penguinperson is offline penguinperson Post #1  October 21,2008, 7:27pm
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Okay so basically, I'm still in love with my ex. We went out about two years ago, then he broke up with me. We were distant for a while but this year I see him more often and we've become good friends. He invites me to hang out and we're very close when we're together. When we hang out he is very flirty, always getting close to me, hugging and touchy/feely stuff. Naturally I would think this means he's interested, but he has a girlfriend who he's been with for almost a year now. I'm so confused, is he leading me on or am I just over-analyzing the situation because I can't get over him?
 
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deadtroll is offline deadtroll Post #2  October 21,2008, 7:42pm
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2 things, either he's playing both sides or your 100% in the friend zone with him. Hard to tell from the amount of information given.
 
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nurse_girl444 is offline nurse_girl444 Post #3  October 21,2008, 7:45pm
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My ex is doing the same thing except he doesn't have a new GF (that i know of). It's hard to tell, while you probably want him to want you back, he could be playing the field too...
 
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Altair is offline Altair Post #4  October 21,2008, 7:47pm
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Maybe he just wants to expand his horizons horizontally. Don't be a part of his cheating. Would it be hard for you to stay just friends?
 
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LonelyStarState is offline LonelyStarState Post #5  October 21,2008, 7:55pm

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i think that he feels that he can touch you when ever, where ever just because he's seen you neked before, like you're his property. dump him again and tell his current g/f what he's doing.
 
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ImmanuelInMyHeart is offline ImmanuelInMyHeart Post #6  October 21,2008, 8:37pm
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If I didn't know any better, I'd say your ex hasn't gotten over you completely. Hard to say with such little info.
 
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talonfinite is offline talonfinite Post #7  October 21,2008, 8:54pm
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It's to little information to really et a grasp as to what he or you are doing. Does he hang out with you alone for long periods of time, like a full day? Do you hang out at his house alone for the night; not spending the night, though. Does he share with you all the details about his relationship with his girlfriend and ask your advice? If you're just hanging out when in groups, there really is nothing there, just your imagination. If it's more than get togethers always in groups, it could be something different but more than likely he just considers you friends.


As for the getting close, flirty and such...when two people cross that boundary into intimacy (not just physical0 it's hard not to cross those friendship lines now and again, no matter how hard you try. Best thing is to take the focus off of him (and the thought of you together) and instead turn it towards making yourslef happy. Waiting around for something that may never happen is just hurting you in the end.
 
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talldrinkowater is offline talldrinkowater Post #8  October 21,2008, 10:38pm
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penguinperson, wrote :

Okay so basically, I'm still in love with my ex. We went out about two years ago, then he broke up with me. We were distant for a while but this year I see him more often and we've become good friends. He invites me to hang out and we're very close when we're together. When we hang out he is very flirty, always getting close to me, hugging and touchy/feely stuff. Naturally I would think this means he's interested, but he has a girlfriend who he's been with for almost a year now. I'm so confused, is he leading me on or am I just over-analyzing the situation because I can't get over him?
And you haven't asked him what it means becauuuuuuse? Seriously, when an inquiring mind wants to know, they ASK. He's seen you nekked, he knows how to have an intimate conversation with you....just ask.
 
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Songryder is offline Songryder Post #9  October 22,2008, 9:12am
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penguinperson, wrote :

Okay so basically, I'm still in love with my ex. We went out about two years ago, then he broke up with me. We were distant for a while but this year I see him more often and we've become good friends. He invites me to hang out and we're very close when we're together. When we hang out he is very flirty, always getting close to me, hugging and touchy/feely stuff. Naturally I would think this means he's interested, but he has a girlfriend who he's been with for almost a year now. I'm so confused, is he leading me on or am I just over-analyzing the situation because I can't get over him?
Okay, he "has" a girlfriend and does this girlfriend know he's flirting with you and getting "close" to you and you're ALLOWING IT?!!!! If I had a BF like that he'd be history . . . and you'd be on the other side of a very pissed off woman. How disrepectful can either of you be? He has a relationship and he should be nowhere near you that much and nowhere near that "close".


His ego is having a field day with all this. Friends is one thing, but be close to needing a hotel room is quite another. Think of how you'd feel if you knew your BF was doing the same thing with an ex. Now go find someone that's unattached to flirt with and stop feeding this guy's libido.
 
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strawberry123 is offline strawberry123 Post #10  October 23,2008, 8:05am
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penguinperson, wrote :

Okay so basically, I'm still in love with my ex. We went out about two years ago, then he broke up with me. We were distant for a while but this year I see him more often and we've become good friends. He invites me to hang out and we're very close when we're together. When we hang out he is very flirty, always getting close to me, hugging and touchy/feely stuff. Naturally I would think this means he's interested, but he has a girlfriend who he's been with for almost a year now. I'm so confused, is he leading me on or am I just over-analyzing the situation because I can't get over him?
If you know he has a girlfriend then that should tell you right there no matter what he is doing he is off boundaries to you. You are a big girl learn to say no!Please don't let him keep doing the touchy/ feely stuff to you because it just makes you want him even more. Know when to say no or stop or hownot to put yourself in the paths of his touches. (Yes and I know it is hard) In the end when he's still dating his girlfriend you will be home waiting for him to call you and alone and you will be the one hurting.


I had someone like that. Eveytime he was around me he was always touching me but had a girlfriend. I felt guilty and I just got sick of it. I felt like I was being used. One day when he went to touch me I just politely said "please do not touch me." I know he knew what I meant by it and I will say he has respected me a lot more because of it. I refused to let him use me that way and since I am a very shy person and it was hard for me to do, however,I feel I am stronger for it.


Here's the thing....if you don't get over him your mind and time will be consumed by him while he's out with his girlfriend enjoying himself. Who wants that??? If you're still friends that is good but you need to learn to set a boundary and stick to it. There is someone else who would enjoy your company as a girlfriend.
 
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