rg26 is offline rg26 Post #21  October 21,2008, 8:51pm
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TrixiPooch,301450 wrote :

"I just know if he ended up dating someone, it would crush me. "


For that reason alone you should stop seeing him. If you went from "dating" to being "friends" but nothing else really changed - still seeing him a lot, communicating with him a lot, then I'd say he simply wants to be able to "date" other people. I don't see any other reason for him clarifying that. I think you'll just end up hurt if you keep seeing him.
+ 1


If you want to be dating him and he doesn't you should end it. Its OK to be friends - with your friends. Not with someone you want to date who doesn't return your feelings. That's a recipe for getting hurt and crushing your self confidence at the same time.
 
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talonfinite is offline talonfinite Post #22  October 21,2008, 8:58pm
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Sounds like a friendship to me...also sounds like he knows what he wants and was up front and honest with you, which is a good thing. In my opinion, you struck a goldmine by finding what could be a best friend and a great friendly relationship....nothing wrong with that at all.
 
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nurse_girl444 is offline nurse_girl444 Post #23  October 23,2008, 11:57am
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It does sound like friendship, except the telling me how beautiful, pretty, cute I am. Noticing my haircut, the using a potential weekend in NYC as an example of a romantic get-a-way to his friends. The huggy-feely stuff. Is that what male friends do?
 
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cappagirl is offline cappagirl Post #24  October 23,2008, 2:25pm
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Nurse_girl - I can't honestly figure this guy out. I know I'm a girl and thats part of it...but he's giving you all the clear signs that he is into you. It doesn't sound like he's got someone else on the go - but honestly...who really knows? Text messaging takes mere seconds so he could be easily doing it with someone else.
Bottomline is - he's all over the map and I think at this point you just need to call him on it. Ask him to define what you guys are and if he says 'just friends' then immediately call him on the flirting. And be honest about your feelings. What have you got to lose? Just be prepared to hear something you may not like. It might suck - but at least you'll know the truth...and you can move forward from there.
REMEMBER - EVERYTHING happens for a reason.
 
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BuzWeaver is offline BuzWeaver Post #25  October 23,2008, 8:15pm
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LonelyStarState,300802 wrote :

for some reason, guys tend to think that they're more attractive when they have a prop, such as a baby/children or a dog.


in your situation, guys tend to also believe that they're more attractive to other women when they're with some hottie!!!!. you get it?

I like Greek columns myself.
 
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sarcasticpsycho is offline sarcasticpsycho Post #26  October 24,2008, 7:15am
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nurse_girl444, wrote :

I was dating this guy back in the summer for a few months and everything was great. He was super considerate, engaged, and wanted to meet my family and friends. He surprised me by saying he needed to be single, which we all know what that means...he either didn't want to date me for whatever reason anymore or he met someone else. Well, since then, he is constantly initiating conversation and he suddenly wants to do everything together. While we don't have a physical relationship...he wants to have breakfast, shop, go hiking, go to movies, basically everything. We talk at work all day, we text over the phone all day. He is for sure flirting with me and is huggy feely, but hasn't tried anything else. I mean could all this guy want is my friendship? Is he leading me on? What is the deal? It is driving me insane.
He is gay.
 
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tbesq is offline tbesq Post #27  October 24,2008, 8:35am
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It could be one of several things: (1) you're not his #1; (2) he's terribly shy; or (3) he's clueless. I had a friend a female friend a long time ago, we did everything together: eating, going to the movies, sitting in class, going out of town. I did try putting my arm around her once, but she gently brushed me aside. We continued to do things together, but I never sensed it would lead to anything. Sometimes, that's just the way it is. But most times, if you're spending that much QT with a person, it's for a reason.
 
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nurse_girl444 is offline nurse_girl444 Post #28  October 26,2008, 2:04pm
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Yeah, "tbesq", I agree that when you're spending that kind of QT with someone, there is a reason for it. I have been in similar situations (flipped roles) with a man in the past and in my case, I needed him to be moreaggressive. That relationship didn't work out and I regret not giving it a chance. In this case, I wonder if being aggressive will work or backfire. He also wants to go out of town next month and I am not really sure what to think or say about it...
 
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jamesp81 is offline jamesp81 Post #29  October 26,2008, 2:24pm
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This guy is odd. I really don't get his behavior. Safest thing to do is come right out and get him to tell you where he's at and where he wants to go. Most men respond well to the direct approach.


Doesn't sound gay to me. He could beasexual, though. It's not a common thing, but it's not unheard of either.
 
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pooh is offline pooh Post #30  October 26,2008, 2:26pm
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You should think about what is the worse thing that could possibly happen if you confront him. With that in mind, think about how you'd respond so you'll be ready. If he's only in it for the friendship then cut out the touchy-feely part of the relationship since it's the most confusing part. Also, do not make yourself readily available to him since "friends" are not usually together 24/7.
 
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