trulyblissed is offline trulyblissed Post #1  September 29,2008, 5:32pm
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I have a crush on a woman I work with. She is seeing someone but I am sure it is not too serious. I have aways treated this woman as a friend, not as a potential romantic partner. But thinking about her behaviorI think she is treating me as guy whois chasing her and she is playing hard to get. I don't think a romantic relationship would work for us for various reasons, but she doesn't seem to want to treat me just as a friend. She is a very privateperson, and if I cannotbe a friend to her without her games I think the relationship is over. I confronted her about playing games with me but she denied it. I would like to be her friend and have her open up to me. Any advice?
 
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PosiTiv65 is offline PosiTiv65 Post #2  September 29,2008, 6:04pm
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trulyblissed, wrote :

I have a crush on a woman I work with. She is seeing someone but I am sure it is not too serious. I have aways treated this woman as a friend, not as a potential romantic partner. But thinking about her behaviorI think she is treating me as guy whois chasing her and she is playing hard to get. I don't think a romantic relationship would work for us for various reasons, but she doesn't seem to want to treat me just as a friend. She is a very privateperson, and if I cannotbe a friend to her without her games I think the relationship is over. I confronted her about playing games with me but she denied it. I would like to be her friend and have her open up to me. Any advice?
What games is she playing? Is it possible that you are misreadingher behaviorbecause, as you state, you have a crush on her?
 
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Songryder is offline Songryder Post #3  September 29,2008, 6:04pm
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trulyblissed, wrote :

I have a crush on a woman I work with. She is seeing someone but I am sure it is not too serious. I have aways treated this woman as a friend, not as a potential romantic partner. But thinking about her behaviorI think she is treating me as guy whois chasing her and she is playing hard to get. I don't think a romantic relationship would work for us for various reasons, but she doesn't seem to want to treat me just as a friend. She is a very privateperson, and if I cannotbe a friend to her without her games I think the relationship is over. I confronted her about playing games with me but she denied it. I would like to be her friend and have her open up to me. Any advice?
She's lying.


First of all you don't really know for sure whether the she's serious about the "someone" she's seeing. It may be why she's so "private" about her life. She's flirting with you while she's got this other guy going on . . . tread very carefully here. It sounds like you're not sure of anything about her and how she behaves is bothering you already. You might want to tell her you just want to be friends, if that's truly your intention, but I get that you're attracted to her as well, which is gonna cause a bunch of confusion for you and it'll be a big ego boost for her.


She's giving you mixed messages and she's not telling the truth about what she's doing. Be careful.
 
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LonelyStarState is offline LonelyStarState Post #4  September 29,2008, 6:15pm

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Stop flirting with your boss !!


Dating people at work is a baaaad idea. If things don't work out, you still have to face them every day and everyone else in the office has to put up with both of your B S.


I don't think she's playing hard to get. I think she's being a rooster tease. Act professional and ignore her. She'll be thinking "is there something on my face??" and will start coming to you.
 
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ThePriestess is online now ThePriestess Post #5  September 29,2008, 6:25pm
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trulyblissed, wrote :

I have a crush on a woman I work with. She is seeing someone but I am sure it is not too serious.


...


Any advice?
Do your best to focus your romantic attentions elsewhere and accept that this situation is not a possibility unless later events change the scenario.
 
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trulyblissed is offline trulyblissed Post #6  September 29,2008, 6:29pm
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Okay, one game I will mention. Recently it was my birthday. I bought her a gift for her birthday last month- nothing spectacular but she enjoyed it. I told her (and others) before my birthday came up and she told me that she would get me a shirt and that I could come over to her house and get it on my birthday. We were both not working that day. Well, on my birthday she was too busy and I couldn't get it that day which got me a little angry.She has a pattern ofmaking plans for us and not following through. The next day she worked and I was never sure if she had actually got me a shirt or not by then but I told her I wanted her to get me a shirt (the shirt or actual gift didn't matter). Shepretty muchknew our friendship was over if she didn't. Well, that night she called me and I got my shirt. Letme restate- I wasn't going to end our friendship overa shirt but because of she told me she wouldget me one.
 
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m8se69 is offline m8se69 Post #7  September 29,2008, 7:01pm
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trulyblissed,277292 wrote :

Okay, one game I will mention. Recently it was my birthday. I bought her a gift for her birthday last month- nothing spectacular but she enjoyed it. I told her (and others) before my birthday came up and she told me that she would get me a shirt and that I could come over to her house and get it on my birthday. We were both not working that day. Well, on my birthday she was too busy and I couldn't get it that day which got me a little angry.She has a pattern ofmaking plans for us and not following through. The next day she worked and I was never sure if she had actually got me a shirt or not by then but I told her I wanted her to get me a shirt (the shirt or actual gift didn't matter). Shepretty muchknew our friendship was over if she didn't. Well, that night she called me and I got my shirt. Letme restate- I wasn't going to end our friendship overa shirt but because of she told me she wouldget me one.
How old are you? And what kind of place do you work, that you were both off on the same day? Sounds childish and totally immature on both parts. Step away from the crush!
 
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trulyblissed is offline trulyblissed Post #8  September 29,2008, 7:19pm
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Too old to be doing this. I know I was immature to get angry over the shirt incident, but she keeps implying we will spend time together and it doesn't materialize. That is really what made me angry- especially on my birthday. I keep thinking, naively it seems she will quit these games and we will become friends. She is warm and friendly- she keeps asking me tolittle things for her and me being a nice guy I do. I have never met a person who wants me to be their friend and yetremain so private.
 
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JHerndon is offline JHerndon Post #9  September 29,2008, 7:20pm
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Friend zone. nuff said.
 
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Alena is offline Alena Post #10  September 29,2008, 7:27pm
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trulyblissed, wrote :

I have a crush on a woman


I don't think a romantic relationship would work for us for various reasons


I think the relationship is over.

she does not have a crush on you


so move on


what relationship? there never was one
 
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