What to do with my marriage?


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love16 is offline love16 Post #11  September 26,2008, 11:27am
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No I am not saying that it drove him to the other women. No he was not like this before. What I am saying is he changed a lot after the deaths to be nasty distanced and evil and not this.
 
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Sarah is offline Sarah Post #12  September 26,2008, 12:04pm
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love16,272875 wrote :

No I am not saying that it drove him to the other women. No he was not like this before. What I am saying is he changed a lot after the deaths to be nasty distanced and evil and not this.
Some people cannot seem to handle grief well and it would seem that your husband is one of them. Now that you know he is cheating on you, what are you going to do about it? It's not a one time thing, he is a serial cheater with mulitple women. He's beyond a cheater, he is a womanizer. He is also putting your healthat risk. Why did you want to have $ex with him when you knew he smelled of $exfrom other women?


What do you think you should do at this point. I know it won't be easy because you have young children and I know it's easy for us to say, "leave him". I realize things aren't that cut and dried to just up and leave suddenly when you have young children.
 
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angelpoet is offline angelpoet Post #13  September 26,2008, 12:38pm
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jayjay,272639 wrote :

You mean...leave a man who is cheating on you with multiple women....blames you for his own behavior...and justifies his cheating by saying 'it's nothing'? Gee....why would you want to miss all that abuse and emotional pain? Of course you need to leave him! And....the fact that you wanted to have sex with a man that you know has been cheating on you and who even 'smelled like sex' at the time....would seem to indicate you have some emotional issues you need to get dealt with. I'd say....talk to some friends...get professional counseling....and a lawyer. Good luck.
well said... listen up.... and save youself!
 
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love16 is offline love16 Post #14  September 26,2008, 12:48pm
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Sarah,272910 wrote :

love16,272875 wrote :


No I am not saying that it drove him to the other women. No he was not like this before. What I am saying is he changed a lot after the deaths to be nasty distanced and evil and not this.


Some people cannot seem to handle grief well and it would seem that your husband is one of them. Now that you know he is cheating on you, what are you going to do about it? It's not a one time thing, he is a serial cheater with mulitple women. He's beyond a cheater, he is a womanizer. He is also putting your healthat risk. Why did you want to have $ex with him when you knew he smelled of $exfrom other women?


What do you think you should do at this point. I know it won't be easy because you have young children and I know it's easy for us to say, "leave him". I realize things aren't that cut and dried to just up and leave suddenly when you have young children.
We have not had sex in a while and the last time we did I made him use a condom. When I smelled the sex it was not that night. He works afternoons, when he was leaving to go to work I was coming in. He kissed me good bye and it was a smell that was left on my lips of sex. I guess I should have made that clear. When he came home that night was when I tryed to have sex with him to see and he could not get hard.
 
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mind1604 is offline mind1604 Post #15  September 26,2008, 12:58pm
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love16, wrote :

I found out that my husband has been cheating on me with at least 3 different women. We have been married for 5 years and just had our 2 child together 6 months ago. Of course he is telling me that it is nothing going on and that he loves me and don't want me to leave. last night he came home late and smelled like sex, I went to have sex with him and he could not get hard, I told him that it was ok I did not want to anymore and he got mad at me and started an argument. I felt that was a sign that he was guilty. I don't know if I should just leave him. Please help.
My advice to you


My case was same we yours only i am man and make mistake don't make you mistake


I was 8 years in marige and have 3 children


she sleep with another man an may 2005 she tell me that ,my only mistake was i vergive to her weil shi craing thats best wapon that women have, and tray all to save marige(not only that for the sake of children ) 2 years long but halp not and lost 2 years um nothing no one can pay me for my lost shi was in contact with him all this 2 years and do same again


and one thing is sure who cheating one time she/or hi will do same again thats true if you brocke somthing an half no one can fix, 2 % of all circumstance go fine


thalk with him one time again but best option is go away from him
 
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Sarah is offline Sarah Post #16  September 26,2008, 12:58pm
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love16,272970 wrote :

Sarah,272910 wrote :


love16,272875 wrote :


No I am not saying that it drove him to the other women. No he was not like this before. What I am saying is he changed a lot after the deaths to be nasty distanced and evil and not this.


Some people cannot seem to handle grief well and it would seem that your husband is one of them. Now that you know he is cheating on you, what are you going to do about it? It's not a one time thing, he is a serial cheater with mulitple women. He's beyond a cheater, he is a womanizer. He is also putting your healthat risk. Why did you want to have $ex with him when you knew he smelled of $exfrom other women?


What do you think you should do at this point. I know it won't be easy because you have young children and I know it's easy for us to say, "leave him". I realize things aren't that cut and dried to just up and leave suddenly when you have young children.


We have not had sex in a while and the last time we did I made him use a condom. When I smelled the sex it was not that night. He works afternoons, when he was leaving to go to work I was coming in. He kissed me good bye and it was a smell that was left on my lips of sex. I guess I should have made that clear. When he came home that night was when I tryed to have sex with him to see and he could not get hard.
What are you going to do about your situation? What do you think you should do? What do you want to do? These are questions you have to ask yourself. You've been advised by posters, now you need to decide how to proceed.


All the best.
 
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love16 is offline love16 Post #17  September 26,2008, 1:16pm
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I thank you all for your advise, I have made an appointment to see a counselor. I have been with this man for 16 years total and it just hurt like hell. I am not sure what I am going to do from here, because I am trying to think about my kids and he pays the big bills. I have very little money.
 
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Sarah is offline Sarah Post #18  September 26,2008, 1:34pm
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I'm sorry you had this happen to you, please seek counseling and legal advice even if it is for information now. This may at least give yousomething to think about and you can start planning other options down the line. You have to think beyond the bills to, are you willing to raise your kids in an unhappy environment where they witness disrespect between their two parents? What type of role model would you be setting up for them to follow as adults.Can you continue to live with a man who is a habitual cheater with multiple women? Start looking at friends and family you can reach out to for support. You have some big decisions to make and some steps to make as you decide how to proceed and what to do. Look up legal aid resources. You may also want to sit down and have a heart to heart talk with your spouse as well..


All the best as you get through this trying time. Again I'm sorry you're going through this pain. I wish you strength to get through it.
 
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cminpgh is offline cminpgh Post #19  September 26,2008, 2:47pm
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love16,273006 wrote :

I thank you all for your advise, I have made an appointment to see a counselor. I have been with this man for 16 years total and it just hurt like hell. I am not sure what I am going to do from here, because I am trying to think about my kids and he pays the big bills. I have very little money.
Always remember that tomorrow is a new day and each day after that is another new day. I went through the 14 year marriage and cheating husband....with every month and every year, as tme passes, it gets easier and the hurt turns to anger...then it all goes away. I can't tell you that I know how you fell as I did not have the financial contstraints that you will face but I wish you luck...at this point you have no choice but to figure out how to make it in your own,,,
 
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