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diannia01 diannia01 is offline
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When you fall in love with someone who is not of your own culture,please, remember that you have to take into consideration their religious point of view before you say,"I do"! That was a bad mistake that Imade with my first husband. I thought everything was going to be fine, until he started pushing his point of view on me constantly after our first year of marriage. Regardless of how much love there was between us (I married him twice during our four years together!),there just wasn't enough to make it work from two points of view religiously...in his opinion.


- September 25th, 2008, 08:54 am
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stoli16 stoli16 is offline
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This article is kind of a shame. All of the things mentioned happen within the first six months of dating someone. Then, BAM! one of these things comes to a head, where one partner can't takethe fact that this one thing is taking the wind out of the sails of the relationshipand then you have the "talk".


At this point, you have two choices:


1) if you are really "feeling" it and you truly believe that this person is worth it. --you work it out.


2) If you are not--you break up.


I think it would have been more helpful if they had an article with questionsto ask yourselfto determine whether or not the new guy or girl is worth getting over the hurdles.
- September 25th, 2008, 10:14 am
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HALLE HALLE is offline
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what do you do if you really care about the person but no matter what they say you still feel like they are holding back something?
- September 25th, 2008, 10:42 am
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Gill35 Gill35 is offline
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Don't stay with somebody because you can't bear to be alone.
- September 25th, 2008, 11:32 am
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jazzyladyd jazzyladyd is offline
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Good Advice here. I have trouble with my date not just looking at other women, it's when they stare them down to see if they'll make eye contact with them. You spend an hour or so to look your best only to have them making eyes at someone else. It can be a little bit insulting. The other side of that coin is, you also have man looking back at you because you did spend the time to look your best.
- September 25th, 2008, 11:36 am
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jazzyladyd jazzyladyd is offline
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Gill35 wrote :

Don't stay with somebody because you can't bear to be alone.
I Agree. However, it's alright to have friends that you do different things with, just not romantically.
- September 25th, 2008, 11:38 am
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Uncle Apple Uncle Apple is offline
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Where was this great article, 4 years ago? Don't break up because of those 8 reasons, nor just because your biological family wants you to.
- September 25th, 2008, 01:39 pm
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Anotherjunkie Anotherjunkie is offline
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What about the break ups that happen without warning or telling you? Hey call me at work, and then you call and he's busy and then nothing...


any advice for that kind of break up?
- September 25th, 2008, 06:30 pm
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incidentlover incidentlover is offline
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irishdancer_jen wrote :

incidentlover wrote :


irishdancer_jen wrote :


Great article - I have recently been talking to and spending time my "ex" again, although I really hate using this term.(It holds such a negative connotation.)Even after 2 years of being apart, I never stopped loving him,but for practical purposes only, we will say "ex". Anwyay, while us being apartmay have been goodin some ways,I feel we broke up for less than reasonable reasons and for reasons stated in this article.


Our biggest problem was that he didn't want to spend as much time with me as I wantedor do a lot of the things I wanted to do.Really, it's nota terrible problem to have though... someone loving another person so much that they want to spend as much time with them as possible. And, on the other end, I could have been more creative and patient. It was more about him than it was me, and I shouldn't have taken it so personally. In retrospect, the fact that I love, trust and respect him more than anyone else I've ever known (and I'm 30 now) is much more important that a relatively small issue that could have been worked though had we communicated a bit more effectively.


It is too soon to tell if we will enter back into a committed relationship or "end up together", but I have every hope we could, and I'm simplygratefulto be givena second chance.


Thanks for writing this article. I hope it will help someone else not make the samemistake that I made and had to learn the hard way.


Good luck, it sounds like you have deep heartfelt feelings for the "ex". Speaking of ex's,a comedian (whose name I forgot) summed it up best... "getting back with an ex is like sour milk, you take it out of the fridge, take a wiff, see that it's spoiled, shrug and put it backhoping thatit may be better tomorrow". That's not verbatim, but you get the jist of it. Usually a person is an ex for a reason.


Thank you for the well wishes, indidentlover. The comedian quote is funny and probably rings true for the most part.


I've actually never gone back to an ex (or wanted to for that matter) until now... not that I've had toomany ex's mind you. I'ma long term kinda gal. But, people grow and learn and change, so never say never.I woulduse the word"mature" here,but sinceI've turned 30, I am opposed to anything that makes me sound old!!!haha


Thanks again! Hope all is well in your world!
No worries, "It is what it is". Good people deserve like kind. I'm not really one to counsel since i've not been on a date or in a relationship for over 5 years. Just see the forest for the trees and best wishes kiddo.
- September 25th, 2008, 07:27 pm
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buddhabill buddhabill is offline
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There are really only 2 reasons you break up with someone:


Either He/She is not the right one, or You are all messed up.


If you look deeply into your own heart without turning away you will know which it is.


If its the frist one, you will break up when the relationship is no longer worth it to you, (really to both of you, but the other person doesn't get it yet).


If its the second one....get some help.....





- September 25th, 2008, 08:30 pm
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