reboundgurl is offline reboundgurl Post #1  August 15,2008, 6:43am
reboundgurl's Avatar

Newbie

Joined: Aug 2008

Posts: 1

See profile



Hi, I need any advice I can get!


I'm dating this guy who is great in every way except, he is still getting over a 6 year relationship (he was the one dumped). Its been about 4 months. We met because he IMed me on AIM (searching through profiles), that same day we talked on the phone for hours, and thats how its been since. We met in person after talking for 3 days and kissed on that same day. Now its been a month and a half. I'm really confused because technically we're just dating and he's made it clear he's not ready for a commitment, he says he is just "going with the flow". We see each other about 2 or 3 times a week and are now even sleeping together. He calls me allevery day several times and would even be upset if I went out with another guy (although we're notboyfriend/girlfriend)He's not the kind of guy who would be playing me, and he's very upfront and honest. And he honestly doesn't know whether something more will happen or not in the future when he's ready. Sometimes he talks about his ex gf a lot, and at first i told him it was alright to do. But now i've brought to his attention that its just a bit too much sometimes. I'm just wondering if i'm wasting my time or whether its worth pursuing. He's definitely the long term relationship kinda guy. I'm a little scared though that either a) he'll get back together with her (which actually doesn't seem like a possibility right now but who knows) or b) will eventually just move on. So I'm really just looking for advice on how to deal with him, act with him, and whether or not this is even worth the effort. Any help!?
 
  Reply With Quote
lookin4the1 is offline lookin4the1 Post #2  August 19,2008, 3:09pm
lookin4the1's Avatar

Outlaw - I am who I am, nothing more, nothing less. Accept it or don't.

Enthusiast

Joined: Jun 2008

Kansas City area

Posts: 514

See profile



Ok, clearly you already know you're the "rebound girl". Second, there's a red flag that's popped up already. He calls you several times a day and will be upset if you start dating someone else and you're already sleeping together. How is this not a committed relationship?


Tell him what you want and if he's not ready for it, then things need to slow down or stop. I can see you getting attached and developing more feelings for him and then he ups and leaves because he's still not ready for a committed relationship.
 
  Reply With Quote
LawyerDan is offline LawyerDan Post #3  August 19,2008, 3:23pm
LawyerDan's Avatar

desert outlaw

Veteran

Joined: Jun 2008

Palm Desert, Ca

Posts: 1,984

See profile



fake OP
 
  Reply With Quote
Fergie_Racer is offline Fergie_Racer Post #4  August 19,2008, 3:28pm
Fergie_Racer's Avatar

is amazed how one person can make me so happy.

Quick Study

Joined: Aug 2008

Indiana

Posts: 139

See profile



Don't get attached.
 
  Reply With Quote
livinagin is offline livinagin Post #5  August 19,2008, 6:08pm
livinagin's Avatar

excited about working again!

Virtuoso

Joined: Apr 2008

Somewhere in Central Florida

Posts: 3,237

See profile



I have very fond memories of my rebound. So there.
 
  Reply With Quote
Pwnd is offline Pwnd Post #6  August 20,2008, 2:40pm

has the best candy

Unregistered

Joined: Aug 2008

NJ

Posts: 220

See profile



OK, here it is. The fact that you are already sleeping with him makes your chances at having a serious relationship with this guy about slim to none. You aren't in a commited relationship with this guy but you chose to sleep with him? There really isn't any incentive for him to commit to you at this point. Seeing as he recently broke up with a long term girlfriend chances are he probably still has some feelings for her, especially considering he was the one that got dumped. You are the rebound girl, you aren't going to be the next long term relationship for this guy. If that is really what you are looking for you should probably look elseware.





Ladies, when you are interested in a guy don't give it up easy. Guys want a challenge, not an immediate conquest for the most part. Regardless of what he says to you or how you feel about him making people wait for a while is a good thing.
 
  Reply With Quote
Reply


« would you kiss someone who just ate Oreos... | Dating | How long do you wait before doing a closeout if they are not responding? »
Topic Tools Search this Thread
Search this Thread:

Advanced Search

Posting Rules
You may not post new topics
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Looking for a Great Relationship?

Get started now. Fill out this form and take the questionnaire to receive your matches.

First Name:

I'm a:
seeking

Postal Code:

Country:

Email:

Confirm Email:

Password:


How did you hear about us?


Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“ ^This is the better plan.. My experience has been that love usually comes along when you least expect it, and when your heart is open enough to let it in. If you try to put a set time table on when ... ” –  TheThinker

Join the “Transition from dating to relationship” discussion

“ As Ingy mentions ...he's good with the lines and multitasking relationships.. All anyone can say is: don't get played again...especially by the same guy twice... Move on to someone who is decisive ... ” –  lynntlb78

Join the “Reuniting with EX” discussion

“This varies based on your age, gender, location, settings, and 29 dimensions. My settings are fairly narrow and I've always gotten a steady stream of matches. But, my location seems to have a lot ... ” –  dmi

Join the “Different Strategy” discussion

“I'm extremely allergic to cats, plus I just don't like 'em. So I won't date someone with cats. Dogs, I love. But I'm attracted to certain types of dogs. A guy with a little yorkie turns me off. ... ” –  ZisaGirl

Join the “What about a "PET BOX" ?? again this sounds simple or??” discussion

“If you get the opportunity, yes.” –  ThePriestess

Join the “Should I ever date in college?” discussion

“...and since you're Shaun Cassidy fan mitchell...this song is just for you! "Da Doo Ron Ron" I met her on a Monday And my heart stood still Da doo ron ron ron Da doo ron ron Somebody told me That ... ” –  legend29

Join the “Robin Gibbs Dead at 62...How Deep is Your Love?” discussion



All times are GMT -8. The time now is 7:44am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2012, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.6.0