You tell me - is there going to be a second date?


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MW77009 is offline MW77009 Post #1  February 8,2008, 9:57am
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Ok, I had an experience about which I would like some advise. I had a first date with a match last Saturday (lunch). I had a great time and I liked her. The last several I have been out with I did not particularly like. I thought I was getting some buy signals from her too. Ergo, I thought we hit it off. After the date, I walked her to her car we hugged each other and I told her I would be in touch. I sent her an email on Tuesday saying I had a good time and wanted to see her again. I gave her all my contact info (phone etc she already had). In retrospect, I probably should have called her (like I normally do) but I was busy and in a hurry. Thus far I have heard nothing in return which is no big deal but this was not part of her communication pattern (she responded usually within 24hr. of any correspondence). I could have missed something but I walked in with minimal expectations and my feelings gradually evolved over the length of the date. Thus, I don't think I am fooling myself. I have had this happen a few times before but always, in retrospect, I was able to figure something out.

The way I see it, I have two options: 1) Forget about it. 2) Do a follow up call next week with a specific and concrete date proposal. Any ideas or feedback would be welcome.

 
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steph86 is offline steph86 Post #2  February 8,2008, 12:55pm
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MW77009 - I would definitely give her a follow upcall. It could be that she had a very busy week too and just hasn't hada chance to respond. At least you'll have a more definite answer if you follow up and won't be second guessing yourself. Good luck!!
 
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goodreadTN is offline goodreadTN Post #3  February 9,2008, 4:39am
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MW- Please call. Having read your other posts in these parts, I trust your judgement about her "buy" signals. She may have had a busy week like you did. Tuesdayis not that long ago, so I would read nothing into that. If I were her, I'd be so wondering what happened to that nice I guy I had lunch with on Saturday.Keep hope alive! Good luck.
 
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Brandi1978 is offline Brandi1978 Post #4  February 9,2008, 6:26am
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Give her a call. I think that all the "normal" communication patterns that you have go out the window once you meet in person. I'm having a similar problem right now. I had a match that I communicated with for over a month and a half. First by long almost daily e-mails then two-hour marathon conversations on the phone every two nights or so. I thought our date went great. We had dinner and spent hours wandering around by the water talking. He walked me to my car and kissed me good-night. Then, nothing. I haven't heard from him since. I called him the following Thursday evening (we had been out the previous Saturday) and he didn't answer. I left a message and I'm still waiting and hoping to hear from him, but to me, it looks bleak. Any thoughts?
 
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DianaInHouston is offline DianaInHouston Post #5  February 9,2008, 9:34am
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I would definately call her. If you get no answer and no return call simply move on.
 
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Gemini79 is offline Gemini79 Post #6  February 9,2008, 2:26pm
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CALL her! Most of us women just want a man to put some effort in! If she doesn't respond just move on... but at least you will know!

Good Luck!
 
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swedishtexan is offline swedishtexan Post #7  February 9,2008, 7:41pm
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OK, I have been on several first dates and the guys tell me how much fun they had and how they want to go out again. A few even emailed a few tmes then they disappear. One 30minute coffee get together ended up being 3 hours of great conversation.He was the one who kept talking. He hugged me and told me he had not had this much fun in a long time. He asked if we could go out again. Then gone??????? Beginning to wonder what the heck I am doing wrong????
 
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MW77009 is offline MW77009 Post #8  February 10,2008, 6:00am
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I intend to call her and I will give an update. Sometimes I wonder if people do not sometimes conflate the idea of dating w/ relationship and thereby think that because they are dating this person; that equals relationship instead of just going out and having fun? Then they get freaked and drop off the radar.
 
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DianaInHouston is offline DianaInHouston Post #9  February 10,2008, 8:49am
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I think you are right and that is too bad as they tend to miss out on the fun of building a friendship which is important to any sort of relationship.
 
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duser123d is offline duser123d Post #10  February 10,2008, 7:33pm
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I'm curious to know how frequent your communication was with her before the date.
 
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