How long before dating exclusively?


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livelife2day is offline livelife2day Post #21  March 8,2008, 5:37am
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Well I am of the opinion that the guy should know what the girl wants and what she wont accept fairly early in the relationship. Thenits very clear, and you are not wasting time or mucking the other person around.And if I am after an exclusive relationship, and we have that discussion very early in the piece, andhe is still hanging around after it, then I think there are no mixed messages or assupmtions. He knows what you want, if he likes it he stays, if not he goes. But being honest and up front never hurt anyone, right from the begining....

So let him know that if the relationship is to become intimate, you will be exclusive and expect the same. I think that is fair. If you aren't sure, then hold off on the intimacy until you get to know the guy better. And time will help with that. If he likes you enough, he will hang around.

I wish us all Good luck in love

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startingfresh is offline startingfresh Post #22  March 9,2008, 11:18am
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Doesn't just happen naturally? My eharmony match and I have now beencommunicating fortwo months and seeing each other for five weeks. Just naturally, we recently both felt that we had met the right match and that it was time to cancel our subscriptions and focus on each other. He actually wrote the most beautiful letter to Eharmony thanking them forenabling us to find each other...
 
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Uncle Apple is offline Uncle Apple Post #23  March 9,2008, 4:51pm
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texasgirl, wrote :
woulDoes anyone else wrestle with this problem? How long do you wait before you bring up the topic of dating exclusively? I'm 46 so maybe it's different in the older age group. LOL Would love to hear some opinions on this especially from the guys. Thanks!
I would say, 6 months to 1 year is good enough time, for waiting. Be sure to have your discussion about it, at the book store over bottes of flavored water.
 
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LeiDyGirly is offline LeiDyGirly Post #24  March 11,2008, 12:03pm
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Date the guy/girl exclusively right after you've felt that they are the ONE you would want to be with for the rest of your life. If not, keep searching! [img]library/editor/plugins/emotions/images/smiley-tongue-out.gif[/img]
 
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Aussie_in_USA is offline Aussie_in_USA Post #25  March 11,2008, 1:33pm
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beloved0000,67768 wrote :
That's easy. I don't date. When a guy shows interest in me, I don't just start going out with him. Sex is not even an issue. Sex to me is so sacred.
I totally agree. I never used to be like that, but a few serious relationships that resulted in a lot of time to heal afterward were not worth it.

I dated a guy last year and broke my self-imposed celibacy rule with him. He's now living in Guatemala... probably to get away from me. Anyway, I've been back on the celibacy bandwagon just as a way of protecting me and ensuring I'm emotionally ready for whatever it is if it ever comes.

And if not... I like being single.
 
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Tigster is offline Tigster Post #26  March 11,2008, 2:46pm
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When I show interest in a woman, she is the only one that gets my attention (no,I don't meanin a stalking way either. And, If she is actively playing the dating game, She doesn't get any attention from me. Plain and simple.

Tig
 
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blueshoe is offline blueshoe Post #27  March 12,2008, 12:10am
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Tig,

Great answer thats the way it should be.
 
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jzlove29 is offline jzlove29 Post #28  March 12,2008, 5:48am
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snowygirl,63928 wrote :
texasgirl, wrote :
Does anyone else wrestle with this problem? How long do you wait before you bring up the topic of dating exclusively? I'm 46 so maybe it's different in the older age group. LOL Would love to hear some opinions on this especially from the guys. Thanks!
Hi there! This is just me, and what I would want in my situation. As soon as you sleep with them, I would hope that they would be exclusive with you.
My experience is an agreement and discussion is always good, just like next step, where are we, and were are we going from here.
 
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rgbgal is offline rgbgal Post #29  March 12,2008, 8:02am
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This is a hard one. Everything will be going great and then exclusivity comes up and guys freak out. These days it's hard to get intimate knowing he may be, and probably is seeing other women in the same way. If only for health reasons this should be brought up and discussed. That way you can make informed decisions.
 
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Tigster is offline Tigster Post #30  March 12,2008, 10:16am
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The "dating other people" thing reminds me of multi level marketing. One person dates 3 different people, those 9 each date 3 different people, those 27 each date 3 different people...etc. The odds of finding "the one" is slim, because when you think you might have found "the one"...the 3 you are dating may be more interested in one of the 3 they are dating on the side...and the 3 they are dating on the side may be more interested in the 3 they are dating on the side....etc. Thatis most likely why you may have one or two dates and never hear from them again. So, that is why I find out if they are dating other people by the end the 1st date (if we hit it off)and before the plans for a second dateare discussed. Ithink it is silly to run home and wait2 days to "text" someone or discuss it in "IM".

Makes my head spin just thinking about it. :-)

Tig
 
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