Demystifying the Single Woman

Demystifying the Single Woman

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Demystifying the Single Woman


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TrialByFire is offline TrialByFire Post #21  March 15,2008, 12:21pm
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Ranimal,54047 wrote :

Clearly written by a female to maintain the Female Agenda. "...be honest"? Oh yeah that'll work. Dear, I slept with your best friend. Run that around the block & see how it works. The female drive to get the male to be honest is so she can have more control of ghe situation while she will be honest when she feels like it. "Material things don't impress us". Which planet does that exist on? You see gorgeous babes flocking to wealth by the busload. Sure a guy can do fine with just a little charm. But, try drivinging up to her fancy home in a beat up'82 Chevette. If she says she is not impressed with material things, let's see how she fields that display.Maybe not all women have marriage on the brain.But, at some point in the relationship, whether months or years, she will bring the subject of marriage to the fore. She's a woman. She wants kids. She wants a man to father them. Yes, some will settle for artificial insemination - butthose womenprobably were not dating anyway. Otherwise there were some good comments re. you really do not need a pickup line. "Hello" works amazingly well. As for sitting around some lady's living room playing video games: that is just rude.
Dear Ranimal,

Not quite sure how many women you know or if perhaps you are yourself a self-loathing female, but in response to your 1.30.08 posting: 1. There are women who would very much prefer a man to be honest with them, even about the bad stuff. Having had men make some pretty intense confessions to me I can say that I felt relieved and many times thanked them for being that honest (this does not mean I continued to see them, it does me that I didn't wire their cars with explosives or spread evil rumors about them). Honesty is not a means to gain control of the relationship, it is a means to being able to plan your own expectations and goals around those of another. 2. Material things: please don't make me laugh. The "gorgeous babes" to whom you refer are generally about 18-24 and desperate for male attention/approval. If that works for you, then by all means proceed. Being a women in my late 20s who is doing quite well for herself, my concern in dating tends to be whether or not he'll be intimidated by the fact that I make more money than him. 3. Marriage and kids: sure, many women would eventually like to settle down, so would, I might add, most men. But if you go back to #1 you'll notice that honesty is one of those factors independent, secure women like to have in a relationship. Most of the women that I know, myself included, will tell a guy within the 1st month our general expectations--depending on the guy this could range from "I have fun spending time with you, but I think this relationship won't progress past the infatuation stage," to "I really like you and hope you'll consider possibly allowing this relationship to turn in a more serious direction some day." In the end, honesty like this allows the other person to make an informed decision, no strings or hurt feelings attached.
 
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Marmo is offline Marmo Post #22  March 15,2008, 1:41pm
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I'd be interested in reading this article after it was adjusted for the less than 30 never married group. Even this article explains that "by the time we get older" or "by the time we graduate from college" etc. This article makes things sound nice but I think it is age specific.
 
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FruitaBu is offline FruitaBu Post #23  March 15,2008, 1:45pm
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Wow! Right on target! I feel like I wrote that article when reading it.
 
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sunshine_e is offline sunshine_e Post #24  March 15,2008, 2:01pm
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In response to ranimal, wanting to be with someone ofsimilar social status has nothing to do with having and/or being impressed with material things. I have often found that people with wealth and education are not big on material possessions. Being flashy has nothing to do with how much money a person has, but instead with a mentality (which to me just lacks class); a mentality I could do without. I think this article is right on. I am a 33 year old single woman and I agree completely with this article. This reallyis how I feel.
 
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BuzWeaver is offline BuzWeaver Post #25  March 15,2008, 3:24pm
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Isn't this article more or less a template of common courtesy and social grace? The best I could hope for is that women subscribe to this ideology, however I wouldn't go so far as to say 'all' single women would obied by it. I like the article it reiterates the basics of common sense.
 
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namaste_n is offline namaste_n Post #26  March 15,2008, 3:54pm
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IF I WAS TO BELIEVE SOME OF THE male REPLIES, YOU WOULD HAVE ME THINKING ALL LESS THAN WEALTHY MEN ARE ALIVE AND COHABITATING. I DONT KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I SEE A LOT OF BLUE COLLARCOUPLES OUT THERE COHABITATING AND LIVING TOGETHER VERY HAPPILY IT SEEMS.

ALL BE IT THE ARTICLE IS IDEALIST IN ITS CONTENT, AS A WOMEN SOME OF THE COMMENT REPLIESFROM MEN ARE A BIT "BITTER DIATRIBE". EVERYONE HAS AN IMAGE OF THEIR IDEAL MAN OR WOMAN AND OR SITUATION.

THE POINT OF THE ARTICLE BEING WOMEN NOW A-DAYS ARE MUCH MORE INDEPENDANT AND CAPABLE OF OBTAINING WHAT THEY WANT ON THEIR OWN RATHER THAN RELYING SOULY ON MEN FOR THEIR COMFORT AND THAT MAYBE NOW A-DAYSIT IS MORE ABOUT COMPATABILITY AND FEELINGS/LOVE RATHER THAN THE CAVEMAN DAYS OF THE STRONGEST MALE IN THE CLAN WHO CAN KILL AND DRAG HOME THE BIGGEST BEAST.

IN SOME WAYS IT IS SAD TO HEAR THAT MEN AND WOMEN STILL STRUGGLE TO UNDERSTAND THEIR NEW IDENTITIES AND ROLES IN SOCIETY, OF LINES THAT ARE NO LONGER DRAWN IN CEMENT OR STONE AS IT BE.

MAYBE GETTING IT OUT IN THE OPEN IN WHATEVER FORUM IS AVAILABLETO TALK/RELEASE/VENT SO WE AS A RACE CAN CONTINUETO UNDERSTAND WHERE, WHAT AND HOWWE NEED TO GROW, LEARN AND WORK ON IN OURSELVES.
 
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Heidelberg_boy is offline Heidelberg_boy Post #27  March 15,2008, 4:11pm
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The "honesty" catch phrase is really hilarious. No single woman I knew was honest with me, yet they yammer on about us being honest. "Oh no, I only dated five other guys before you" translates to five guys they went out a minimum of one month. One night stands, club hopping, and anything three weeks or less doesn't qualify. "Material things don't impress us" is another phoney. I purposely dress down, wear no jewelry, and carry very little cash on me. I usually drive a small 4 cylinder Honda car that's at least 4-5 years old. Why? I have train-wreck syndrome. I want to see if being sweet, kind, and gentlemanly is what they truly want. So, far everygirl I dated started out great and I'm thinking (yes, finally someone who appreciates my humor and compliments about her, and doesn't think I'm weird for holding the door for her) then a couple weeks or months into it, she's two-timing me and lying about it. The reason? she wanted excitement in her life and cheated on me with a "bad boy" type. Ugh! So, then I tell her guess what? I've been lying to you as well, I'm actually loaded and I'm from a very wealthy family and their faces always drop about 40 degrees down, LOL!
 
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SillyMe is offline SillyMe Post #28  March 15,2008, 4:31pm
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Address any responses to this to "Gary", because i am hoping women will respond, because im lost as to what women are really looking for.

Im 46, a guy, and quite genuine with people in general, but find i get ignored, or laughed at when i say a simple hello. I got kinda blind-sided on Superbowl night at a local bar by a gal who was younger than I. After talking about an array of different topics, she kissed me (which soon turned into a kiss-fest) I told her (because i am honest) my age, and found out she was 20 yrs younger than me. She gave me her number before she, and her friends left that night, and told me to call her. After 3 calls, and 2 innocent meesages, i gave up, and deleted her number. Why would ya give someone yer number, and tell them to call you, if yer not gonna answer, or call them back. Im just curious if this is something that women do for fun. I think about that night, and her still to this day......even though the age difference is there, can it not be possible to find common interests that make dating possible?
 
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b4real is offline b4real Post #29  March 15,2008, 4:31pm
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Pretty funny stuff....I got a kick out of "we can handle rejection,just let us down easy"

That might be something you women might want to keep in mind next time some guy tries to talk to you.

The brad pitt thing is funny as well...You do care how we look.

If brad pitt said or did all the things the article says not to do....he'd still get over.

In reality nice guys finish last....admit it

how many times have you heard a women say "He's nice but he's too nice"

How many times have you EVER heard a man say that

but yet women always say men like women who are "BItchy"

most likely because THEY seem to be attracted to the "A_HOLES"

I hope things will change

I wish women REALLY wanted what your article says they do....but in my exsperiance the respond to the opposite more often than not.
 
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sweetkeva is offline sweetkeva Post #30  March 15,2008, 4:47pm
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Ranimal,54047 wrote :

Clearly written by a female to maintain the Female Agenda. "...be honest"? Oh yeah that'll work. Dear, I slept with your best friend. Run that around the block & see how it works. The female drive to get the male to be honest is so she can have more control of ghe situation while she will be honest when she feels like it. "Material things don't impress us". Which planet does that exist on? You see gorgeous babes flocking to wealth by the busload. Sure a guy can do fine with just a little charm. But, try drivinging up to her fancy home in a beat up '82 Chevette. If she says she is not impressed with material things, let's see how she fields that display. Maybe not all women have marriage on the brain. But, at some point in the relationship, whether months or years, she will bring the subject of marriage to the fore. She's a woman. She wants kids. She wants a man to father them. Yes, some will settle for artificial insemination - but those women probably were not dating anyway. Otherwise there were some good comments re. you really do not need a pickup line. "Hello" works amazingly well. As for sitting around some lady's living room playing video games: that is just rude.
Ok...if you really slept with her best friend, it's not that you're being honest about it that is the problem. Material things DON'T impress those of us who aren't gold diggers. I don't care if you drive a Lamborghini. If you're a jerk, you're a jerk. I've dated guys on every end of the spectrum from dirt poor to fairly wealthy & to be honest, I didn't know which they were for at least a few dates.

And maybe the problem you're having is that you are telling us what we think instead of listening. I know I don't want marriage or kids & most of my friends aren't on the fast track for either of them. Just goes to prove that those who "get it" get it.
 
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