Advice and Support from Thousands of Users Just Like You

Dating First-date jitters? Hoping for a second date? Moving on to a full blown relationship? Share your journey and advice here.

Reply
Page 2 of 7 1 2 3 4 Last »
 
LinkBack Thread Tools
hazmat hazmat is offline
hazmat's Avatar

hazmat is relaxing...

Veteran

Join Date: Apr 2008

Posts: 1,885

See profile



I'm just pissed that it takes so long to access my pm's...grrr.
- July 7th, 2008, 02:59 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#11   Reply With Quote
pkren35 pkren35 is offline
pkren35's Avatar

pkren35 got her first par on an actual golf course!

Quick Study

Join Date: May 2008

Posts: 186

See profile

JEG wrote :

goldengirl7676, wrote :





And what's up with the guys who don't fill out their entire profile and give short, nondescript answers, usually with no photo attached? eH seems to be sending me a lot of those lately and I close all of them out because these guys put no thought into their profiles and do not give me any sort of info about themselves. And Idon't likewhen the guyspost fuzzy, faraway photos where you can't even make out which person they are. Or the ones where some girl has obviously been chopped out of the photo. I also don't care for bad web-cam photos or those up-against-the-bathroom-wall self-portraits. Shirtless photos are a major turnoff, too.





Well, I will have to say that the women I have made it to the first date stage with all commented to me how surprised/impressed they were at how muchI wrote in my responses to them. So, any other men listening, it's worth the effort...








And, yeah, the whole photo thing irks me to the max. An upscale matchmaker service should require a minimum of quality photos in every profile before ever matching it to someone. But, expensive and quality are not the same...
JEG, I agree....we're paying good money...but you know, quality is also pretty subjective. One person's AMAZING photo may be another person's not-so-much photo....


Kudos to you for filling out your profile though. I won't even LOOK at a profile if it doesn't have a fair number of full sentences...


And, when I close them out, I always put the "Based on statements in their profile, I'm not interested..." or whatever that one is...I wish there was a close-out that said, "NOT ENOUGH DETAIL!"


- July 7th, 2008, 03:08 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#12   Reply With Quote
ThePriestess ThePriestess is online now
ThePriestess's Avatar

ThePriestess thinks this place is great for advice on how to stay single!

Sage

Join Date: Apr 2008

Posts: 10,196

See profile

goldengirl7676, wrote :

I received a match today who said on his profile, "I am not rich. In fact, I have a lot of debt. But I am happier than I've ever been." That's great that he's happy, but that statement made me wonder. Nobody said anything about being rich, but is it too much to ask for an eH match to be financially responsible and able to support himself?
If this is an issue that, regardless of everything else, makes him an undesired match for you then close him out.


He was honest and upfront ... would you rather he lied?


Should he not be allowed to use eHarmony because of his situation?
- July 7th, 2008, 03:19 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#13   Reply With Quote
dansjudge dansjudge is offline
dansjudge's Avatar

Newbie

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 32

See profile



I think the vast majority of my 'matches' are non-subscribers, as they have no photo. Since joining this group and learning a bit about how guys/girls communicate (particularly that girl who is up until 3am writing answers to a entire passell of folks, and asks the guys to be patient while she tries to get back to them)...but, I digress.


With no-photo matches, I immediately click to ask for a photo. I will then close them out in two weeks, assuming they don't know how to post a photo or they are non-sub.


The folks (i.e. guys) that post such minimal info on their 'profile' DO have to answer ALL OF THOSE FREAKIN questions in order to get to that phase....not sure whether they are truthful, but they do have to do at least that much to get sent to our 'in box'.


I do know " a friend " who tested out the theory and went on EH with a different e-mail address and answered all of the questions and profiles with her own info to see if she would match to herself. And, low and behold in about 1 week she did pop into her own box! Funny though, "she" forgot who she was when she came through as a match and was all excited to meet this new match! About a few lines into the profile it seemed to good to be true, and sure enough it was!








- July 7th, 2008, 03:19 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#14   Reply With Quote
sabete2002 sabete2002 is offline
sabete2002's Avatar

sabete2002 I was modded???!!!!

Veteran

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 2,191

See profile

kelygirl83 wrote :

How about when you have your settings to 30 miles only and you're getting multiple matches in Canada, Australia, and India (I am in North Carolina btw) and no matches for the USA. Is this what I signed up (and paid $50 dollars a month) for?
I think the distance thing has to be set at "extremely important" or whatever it is. Apparently, if it is set at "somewhat important" you'll get matches from all over.
- July 7th, 2008, 03:40 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#15   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Jennweb Jennweb is offline
Jennweb's Avatar

Jennweb likes cake

Pacesetter

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 365

See profile

kelygirl83 wrote :

LOL Hi neighbor! When I was getting local matches most of them were in Cary and Raleigh. Maybe one or two chapel hillians. Have you reached OC with any locals?
Yep I even went on a date. Maybe you have been on a date w/ him too? lol He was from Durham, 26, very much a NC native. "farm" in WV. Sound familiar? I've reached OC with a few CHers and on Carborro'ian. Nothing exciting. How many dates have you been on?
- July 7th, 2008, 04:24 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#16   Reply With Quote
jayjay jayjay is online now
jayjay's Avatar

jayjay ...is relieved that the homebuyer's tax credit has been extended.

Power Poster

Join Date: Jun 2008

Posts: 7,411

See profile

goldengirl7676, wrote :

I received a match today who said on his profile, "I am not rich. In fact, I have a lot of debt. But I am happier than I've ever been."
Isn't that great? This guy probably thinks he's making some kind of deep, meaningful statement. I dare say most of us could have a great time and be happy if we spent money like water and went into debt....that is, until the credit cards were maxed out and it was time to pay the piper. I'd take a pass on someone who wrote something like this.
- July 7th, 2008, 04:54 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#17   Reply With Quote
cp30 cp30 is offline
cp30's Avatar

cp30 is making big plans...

Power Poster

Join Date: Dec 2007

Posts: 5,353

See profile



I never pay any attention to the profiles that are not filled out, and don't respond to them, waste of my time.


As for the debt, that is a weird thing to state in the profile. I would not respond because its just a weird thing to say, straight off. Its just off putting.


But I have found many people have different attitudes about debt. I think many overreact to it (and that shows my attitude) and some people are obviously not smart about money and don't make enough money or have enough earning potential to justify the debt. All of us have different comfort levels with debt and I think we just need to be with someone we are compatible with...or someone that tempers us if we are too far in one direction.


I would not respond to the guy either, but not because of his debt (I have plenty of debt myself but it was all neccessary, and all worthwhile, and I do have the earning power to cover it, but I'm still working on that as a younger person). I just think its a weird thing to say, a little TMI like talking about your ex in your profile (close those people too).


Personally, being single my debt doesn't bother me because its mine and I take care of biz-nis' and the thought of some person coming into my life and getting all anxious and weird about MY finances would really tick me off. Its been my business for a long time, I can't imagine someone coming alone and getting all weirded out by something that is mine and mine alone to deal with. I have good credit and debt....it kinda goes together sometimes. I might be more suspicoius of someone who has no debt...do they have any credit? Has there parents paid for everything? School, cars, apartments, house all that? I'm 30 not 50. Its to be expected unless you have had someone helping you a lot or you have not taken any risks. Hyper sensitivity about debt scares me more....responsible use of credit is nothing to be afraid or ashamed of in my opinion. The guy apparently did not elaborate on his situation, only said he has a lot of debt? Well you can have a lot of debt and have a quite promising future at the same time.....his choice of words though, and sense of timing is highly unnatractive.


but a lot of debt to one person might be a drop in the bucket to me.


Just saying...


- July 7th, 2008, 05:12 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#18   Reply With Quote
FruitaBu FruitaBu is offline
FruitaBu's Avatar

FruitaBu is at home.

Veteran

Join Date: Mar 2008

Posts: 2,318

See profile

I am so annoyed. I have lost messages. Comments are deleting themselves. I can't even get into my messages now. This is ridiculous. Tech support!!
- July 7th, 2008, 05:17 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#19   Reply With Quote
ThePriestess ThePriestess is online now
ThePriestess's Avatar

ThePriestess thinks this place is great for advice on how to stay single!

Sage

Join Date: Apr 2008

Posts: 10,196

See profile

jayjay wrote :

Isn't that great? This guy probably thinks he's making some kind of deep, meaningful statement. I dare say most of us could have a great time and be happy if we spent money like water and went into debt....that is, until the credit cards were maxed out and it was time to pay the piper. I'd take a pass on someone who wrote something like this.
OR ...


... maybe he got his finances trashed by an ex.


... had a medical emergency.


But we could just assume he's a complete loser.
- July 7th, 2008, 05:22 pm
Digg this Post!Add Post to del.icio.usBookmark Post in TechnoratiFurl this Post!Share on Facebook

#20   Reply With Quote

ADVERTISEMENT

Reply
Page 2 of 7 1 2 3 4 Last »

Bookmarks

« That one special thing... | Array | the eH match to beat all »
Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts
BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is On
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are On

Latest on our Dating Advice Discussion Boards

“I get my ideal color which is Brown with highlights by using Excellence Cremelights.” – pennystew

Join the “L'Oréal's 'Find Your Fall Hair Color' Sweepstakes!” discussion

“I think this may change with age and experience dating. For a younger man or woman, it may feel as though the person calling and asking for dates must really like then and thus it might be perceived ... ” – RoxyRedhead

Join the “does persistance pay off?” discussion

“The best movie I have seen in the last six months came out in 1928 and I watched it for the class I'm taking. It was The Passion of Joan of Arc, directed by Carl Th. Dreyer. It's a silent film and ... ” – lindseyk

Join the “Best movie--last 6 months” discussion

“I think you are actually thinking correctly that Thanksgiving together so soon would be a bit strage. Also, that you should just go spend it with your family and rather than letting your date make ... ” – DancingFool

Join the “Made plans for Thanksgiving, now he is unsure” discussion

“What cruise line did you use? I recently went on a cruise to the Bahama's and didn't have to deal with any of that annoying stuff. We weren't forced to tip anyone, at any point. We could even choose ... ” – Dafearon

Join the “Is a Cruise a good Date?” discussion

“So what would be the best financial advice that anybody ever gave you (besides buy Google 10 years ago ^_^).” – Mr_Right

Join the “What is the best financial advice anybody has ever given you?” discussion

“So I've learned from these posts that I am not wrong for feeling this way. I agree, weekend dates hold more weight...more time, no work pressure the next day etc. So, given all of this, is there a ... ” – Can_I_just_be_Jo

Join the “Is there a difference between weekday and weekend dates?” discussion

“I think a lot of people start on eH trying to find a website that will be different that dating in real life. But in practice, online dating is just another version of the same old thing. It can't ... ” – librarybabe

Join the “How do I stop getting too attached to my matches too soon?” discussion



All times are GMT -7. The time now is 11:30 am.

Discussion Boards Archive

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.1
Copyright ©2000 - 2009, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Friendly URLs by vBSEO 3.3.0