A 10% Response Rate is Fairly Typical

There are quite a few active threads on the boards from newcomers, wondering whether their online experiences are normal, or whether their results are subpar. Rather than posting numerous times, I figured I would start a new thread to detail my experiences.

I was active on several online dating sites, including eHarmony and Match, for about a year -- from late 2010 to late 2011 (when I met my GF). Over that time period, I received responses from approximately 10% of the women that I initiated communication with -- either by sending an email (for sites other than eH) or by starting GC (for eH). Based on my participation in other threads on this topic, I think that those results are pretty typical for guys using online dating sites.

Now, there are a couple of techniques that I developed as the year went on that improved my results slightly: (i) on sites other than eH, sending a streamlined (2 sentence) initial email commenting on a fact or 2 from the woman's profile, and (ii) not bothering to contact anyone who was not active on the site within the last few days. My profiles varied from well written (eH) to thrown together (POF), and my photos were pretty bad, because I just used whatever I had available. I might have improved my response rate slightly if I improved my photos. Be that as it may, 10% is what I, an average guy from Jersey, was able to achieve.

Has anyone gotten a significantly higher response rate? If so, what techniques did you use?

Has anyone gotten a significantly higher response rate? If so, what techniques did you use?

This technique only worked for me on match; modified, it can work on eh, but my results were significantly different. I got a little bogged down at work once and decided that due to a lack of time, I would only email woman that looked at my profile; I didn't have time to go trolling myself. Following that logic, in a 30 day span I emailed 8 women, 4 responded, and I went on 3 dates that month. Of course the following month wasn't nearly as exciting. I think I got 1 date that month, and none on the third.

On eh I tried that once when I got busy again, except because of the way it's set up, I waited until they went back to my profile twice. This was the indicator to me (however mislead it may have been) that they may want me to reach out to them with GC. In a 4 month time span I sent out a TOTAL of 3, got one reply, and dated her for a while before circumstances split us apart. The number may have seem higher, but 1 reply in 4 months hardly seems like a sound technique. I wouldn't recommend it.

Yes, I had a much, much higher response rate. I improved my physical shape at the gym and posted clear photos and a detailed "no-hedging" profile telling matches exactly who I really am.

There are quite a few active threads on the boards from newcomers, wondering whether their online experiences are normal, or whether their results are subpar. Rather than posting numerous times, I figured I would start a new thread to detail my experiences.

I was active on several online dating sites, including eHarmony and Match, for about a year -- from late 2010 to late 2011 (when I met my GF). Over that time period, I received responses from approximately 10% of the women that I initiated communication with -- either by sending an email (for sites other than eH) or by starting GC (for eH). Based on my participation in other threads on this topic, I think that those results are pretty typical for guys using online dating sites.

Now, there are a couple of techniques that I developed as the year went on that improved my results slightly: (i) on sites other than eH, sending a streamlined (2 sentence) initial email commenting on a fact or 2 from the woman's profile, and (ii) not bothering to contact anyone who was not active on the site within the last few days. My profiles varied from well written (eH) to thrown together (POF), and my photos were pretty bad, because I just used whatever I had available. I might have improved my response rate slightly if I improved my photos. Be that as it may, 10% is what I, an average guy from Jersey, was able to achieve.

Has anyone gotten a significantly higher response rate? If so, what techniques did you use?

My own experience is somewhat similar to Gr8guy. I know I've emailed hundreds of women at least among a group of sites, primarily match and OKC, though a bit on Jazzed a while back.

As far as responses from those just by a return email.. I'm certain it's less than 10%. Meeting in person, 2 out of hundreds is probably in those single digits too.

OKC has been my best site by far... match was silent for a year short of one match to meet in person plus two very short email conversations. I wrote at least the req. to get the match deal plus quite a few more... so those plus quite a bunch on OKC now too must equal 150-200 by now. It feels like much more so...

Eharmony, I'm not ss, but in 2 years.. 2 matches have sent requests for GC. Since I'm not initiating there, it's explained but my profile isn't catching any eyes either way.

POF, very quiet in the responses there too, but i've written far fewer mails.

OP, I'd agree with Gr8guy, you're hardly having to try and getting high success rates against a norm. You'd be overwhelmed it sounds like if you write a lot more.